Country route drivers

What is some of the craziest $h|+ you've seen hillbillies do out in the country?? Recently I saw a guy sawing the head of a 14 point buck that was dead on the side of the road. WTF
 

rod

Retired 22 years
had a guy shooting birds off his bird feeder because "it cost him too much to feed them"


I loved the "rural route" part of my route. You never knew what you woud find at the next stop.
 

soberups

Pees in the brown Koolaid
Lets see....

I have delivered to farms at the same time the butcher was there to slaughter and process a couple of their cows. He has a mobile slaughtering van equipped with a winch, a hoist, and a freezer in back. He shoots them in the head from about 75 yards away with a scoped .30-06, then hooks a cable to them and winches them over to the truck and up onto the hoist and starts cutting.

I also have a pig farm on my route that sells whole hogs to the local Samoan/Pacific Islander community for their traditional open-pit bar-b-q's. The guy puts on a pair of hip boots and wallows out into the knee-deep muck of the pig pen with a shotgun, blasts the chosen pig in the head (while all the other pigs squeal and run around in a panic), and drags it back to his waiting customers where cash is exchanged and the pig is tossed into the trunk of a car.

I had a customer way out in the country who lived in an actual teepee for over 2 years while he was saving up the cash to have a manufactured home set up on his property. He had a generator he could fire up when he needed power, as well as a satellite dish, a TV, a cell phone and a porta-potty.

I have several customers who grow dope. I can smell it from a quarter of a mile away.

I have customers who ought to be on the TV show "hoarders". One lady in particular has literally thousands of small plastic pots with mostly dead plants and flowers in them. To get to her front door you have to walk on this little path thru all of the pots that is barely wider than your feet. The property is overgrown with weeds and brush and junk, and everywhere you look there are all of those plastic pots full of dead flowers. The house is covered in cobwebs and all of the windows have the blinds drawn and it is a dark and spooky and morbid place. The lady is a QVC addict and gets stuff constantly, and the garage is now full of empty QVC boxes. I hate going there, I am always afraid that one day I will wind up tripping over a dead body or something.
 

UpstateNYUPSer(Ret)

Well-Known Member
I deliver in the city but also have a hoarder on my area. She passed away about a month ago and they had to bring in three dumpsters to get rid of all of her stuff. She was also a QVC queen and the stack of empty QVC boxes was impressive. Her kids are cleaning the place up to put back on the market.
 

dillweed

Well-Known Member
Not so sure this is crazy. Bet he stuffed the thing and made some good $$$

What is some of the craziest $h|+ you've seen hillbillies do out in the country?? Recently I saw a guy sawing the head of a 14 point buck that was dead on the side of the road. WTF
 

menotyou

bella amicizia
I have never understood the sport, myself. But, I live in deer central. I think we are going to put a new house out back and turn this one into a store/ice cream stand/coffee shop kinda place. The seasonal traffic if phenomenal.
 

bigbrownhen

Well-Known Member
The guy was probably going to have the head mounted and make up some bs story of how he took the buck himself. If he is an honest joe, then perhaps just taking the antlers, they are great to "rattle" another buck in during season. It is common around here in the fall to see deer hanging in a tree in the yard to be processed. Up around the lake, you might see catfish heads drying on a fence post along the road.

I have seen the "hoarders" on route as well. Some folks live that way out of pure lazyness or just don't know any better.

The scary ones, are the meth/dope dealers. Lately the people "tweaking" on the K2 stuff. Some stores sell the "legal version" here, but laws are coming soon to make it illegal thank goodness.
 
Just watching that guy saw off that head made me lol and say hillbillies over and over again. Laughing is healthy so something good came out of it.
 
Lets see....

I have delivered to farms at the same time the butcher was there to slaughter and process a couple of their cows. He has a mobile slaughtering van equipped with a winch, a hoist, and a freezer in back. He shoots them in the head from about 75 yards away with a scoped .30-06, then hooks a cable to them and winches them over to the truck and up onto the hoist and starts cutting.

I also have a pig farm on my route that sells whole hogs to the local Samoan/Pacific Islander community for their traditional open-pit bar-b-q's. The guy puts on a pair of hip boots and wallows out into the knee-deep muck of the pig pen with a shotgun, blasts the chosen pig in the head (while all the other pigs squeal and run around in a panic), and drags it back to his waiting customers where cash is exchanged and the pig is tossed into the trunk of a car.

I had a customer way out in the country who lived in an actual teepee for over 2 years while he was saving up the cash to have a manufactured home set up on his property. He had a generator he could fire up when he needed power, as well as a satellite dish, a TV, a cell phone and a porta-potty.

I have several customers who grow dope. I can smell it from a quarter of a mile away.

I have customers who ought to be on the TV show "hoarders". One lady in particular has literally thousands of small plastic pots with mostly dead plants and flowers in them. To get to her front door you have to walk on this little path thru all of the pots that is barely wider than your feet. The property is overgrown with weeds and brush and junk, and everywhere you look there are all of those plastic pots full of dead flowers. The house is covered in cobwebs and all of the windows have the blinds drawn and it is a dark and spooky and morbid place. The lady is a QVC addict and gets stuff constantly, and the garage is now full of empty QVC boxes. I hate going there, I am always afraid that one day I will wind up tripping over a dead body or something.
I have two hoarders on my route. I don't know how they live. They both receive QVC and Amazon packages every day. Inside their houses, they have a path leading from the door to each room. With the exception of the path, every square inch of their house is comprised of boxes, junk, etc... It amazes me they live like that.
 

moreluck

golden ticket member
yeah, thats why I watch hoarders buried alive, I think the same thing, and it makes me, tidier.
I cringe when they start pulling out the junk and there's roaches all over and skeletons of long lost pets and dried up old poop!! How do they even stand the stench?
 

rod

Retired 22 years
I have never understood the sport, myself. But, I live in deer central. I think we are going to put a new house out back and turn this one into a store/ice cream stand/coffee shop kinda place. The seasonal traffic if phenomenal.

If you are going after the deer hunting crowd you would better off to turn your old place into a bar-------------thats where most of the hunting takes place anyway.
 

toonertoo

Most Awesome Dog
Staff member
I cringe when they start pulling out the junk and there's roaches all over and skeletons of long lost pets and dried up old poop!! How do they even stand the stench?
yes I was just watching a cat one. I actually had a house that had 140 cats on my route, I knew it had alot, they would be in between the windows when I would pull up across the street. One day I had an Omaha steaks delivery and when they opened the door , I dropped the box, OMG. She ended up dying there and her son had moved out. She was dead 2 weeks before someone knew, it was summer and 90. They tore the house down. Her son was mad, it was his inheritance.
 
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