Depression

['Lord Brown's bidding']

Ah, a subject close to my heart....Everyone in my family suffers with depression, and three of the four have been diagnosed with Bi-polar disorder (although we question two of those diagnoses).

First off, depression is a natural thing that almost everyone experiences; it's a defense mechanism of the body, to help it from becoming overwhelmed from emotional stress and becoming a complete wreck (hence, those who said stress can lead to depression are right). I said almost because we all may know someone who is an emotional wreck, and much like the mechanism that leads to someone becoming "clinically depressed" is malfunctioning in them, the person who is always an emotional wreck is also suffering from a malfunctioning mechanism, just it is the opposite: their depression won't turn on, whereas a chronically depressed person's mechanism won't turn off.

What is depression? Simply put, the body has a mechanism-a chemical whose name escapes me right now-that shuts off one's emotions so that, as I have said before, their emotions don't overwhelm the body. A basic example of this is when you hear a news report of some huge disaster that kills many people and drastically alters the lives of many more, maybe by forcing them to move, or they lose everything they have. By design people have the ability-most, anyway-to be empathetic, to place themselves in someone else's shoes and feel what they feel. However, what would happen if you identified to an intimate level with those who suffered such a disaster, constantly thinking about how you'd react if your home was destroyed, or if you lost even one family member, much less half or all? The body prevents that by shutting down your emotions, if only for a brief moment; that process makes you "depressed". However, then sports comes on and the Phillies have won the world series (or Giants, or dem stinkin' Mets, or whoever) and you move on. The body goes through another chemical change using serotonin-I remember that one-and you are restored to normal.

Because of what depression is-a lack of emotion to prevent being emotionally overwhelmed-it is not "sadness", which is an emotion. Generally-speaking, when someone has "the blues" they are probably not depressed, they are sad. Symptoms are similar-low energy ebb, no desire to do things they enjoy-but sadness is an emotion; if you remain sad for too long, to "protect itself" the body will cause you to become depressed, so that emotion does not cause serious harm, but like a fever fighting a virus, the mechanism can have some devastating consequences if it is malfunctioning. However, it is a great pet-peeve of mine to hear people make sadness synonymous with depression, because what then follows are things that can help sad people but not necessarily depressed ones, especially clinically-depressed ones (you don't "cheer-up" because your body won't let you, not because you just aren't trying, and all the fun things in the world may not help depending on the severity of the depression). I will admit, though, it can be difficult distinguishing between the two if you are suffering from depression.

 

['Lord Brown's bidding']

What many think of as "depression"-when used correctly, not sadness-is properly referred to, technically at its base, as clinical depression (remember, except for emotional wrecks, everyone gets "depressed", if only to prevent greater harm). The problem with those who are clinically-depressed, or worse (manic depressive, although it is now called Bi-Polar, with two sub-classes; major depression; major depressive syndrome, etc.), is that the mechanism that restores one from a depressed state-the release of serotonin-is faulty, and they are not fully restored. Thus they stay in a state with either low-emotions or next-to-none at all. Having dealt with it, I can say you don't "feel" anything, even sad (when I was depressed I wished I could feel sad, believe it or not). I felt dead, or more precisely inanimate, like a rock or other lifeless object, and most others describe it similarly. I would not wish it on my worst enemy; it hurts my heart to have the thought, as evil a thing as it was.
Depression is not hereditary (although, if we all have a common ancestor, seeing how it is natural, I guess it it!); what is is the gene that cause the mechanism to go faulty that regulates the release of serotonin. IOW, just because your mom is bi-polar doesn't mean you will be, too. You are just more susceptible to get it than someone without that gene is, but they may develop it, too, whereas you may not. My maternal-side of the family gets the gene from my grand mom, but of the 7 of them only two became bi-polar. Nonetheless, one of my mom's sisters dreaded becoming bi-polar; nonetheless, she lives a very fulfilling, engaging, exciting life as a missionary, and thus her situation-with all the excitement and positive experiences that came with it-was not conducive to developing bi-polarism, and now that she is in her 40's (depression typically is onset in one's late-teens to early-20's) the risk is virtually non-existent. How one lives their life, more so than their genes, determines one's fate regarding becoming clinically depressed.

 

[undies]

I've been diagnosed with situational depression. The situation being my job. Over the years I've managed to learn how to manage my emotions and stop letting all the crap to me so bad. I still get stressed out here and there but you just have to let it go and realize some things are just out of your control.

 

['Lord Brown's bidding']

To the OP, the main thing I have learned about depression-whether avoiding it or coping with it-is how do you live. I have the same job or have worked many of the same jobs as others here, yet I am no where near as cynical or negative as many here are. Part of that was being raised to try to have a positive view versus a negative one, and now part of that is to avoid sliding back into depression since I am susceptible to it. Life-style changes are big-what you eat, how you sleep, etc.-and make them if you must; make them! Find a way, but do it.

Get medical help, although that doesn't necessarily involve a doctor, much less drugs/meds. Everyone really should start with behavioral therapy, in my opinion. Cognitive therapy especially good, because it doesn't concern itself so much with discovering the causes or root issues-although that will be explored some, but no visit-after-visit of "lying on the couch talking about your mother', which is a negative perception that scares many who need help; scared me, too-as focusing on practical suggestions to help you cope better. Simple things, like as some said learning to truly only worry about what you can control. However, that is easier said than done, moreover it has to be applied in a specific way; again, what works when you are sad won't necessarily work if you are depressed. Nonetheless, life changes may be all you need, but you should get professional guidance in how to proceed. And if medication is involved, even that doesn't have to be permanent, just as one doesn't have to take medicine to reduce a fever indefinitely (unless the fever is indefinite, but that usually leads to death in a short time, anyway).

The mistake many make is waiting until it is too far along, when major changes are necessary-like seeing a therapist indefinitely, usually for life, or taking meds for a similar time period-or worst, the depression gets the best of them and they hurt or kill, either themselves are someone else. If you suspect you are depressed, don't become that latter person; get help now. If you are stressed, get help now before you system becomes overwhelmed and you become depressed. If you are in a situation that can lead to stress, do something to alleviate it. In UPS' case you may need to find other employment, or change your perspective on your current job; focus on what you like about it, and grow from there (if there isn't anything you like except the pay and benefits, find something else, seriously; rather you not need the health benefits to the extent a depressed person will than you stick around an become one who needs them, although easier said than done). I love serving people; I love challenging myself, finding a better way to get from point A to point B while beating "their numbers"; I love going the extra mile for my customers. These loves transcend UPS btw, so I do not have to drink "the brown kool-aid" to feel the way I do. Now that I know how to cope with having depression-I do not suffer with the worst type (bipolar disorder) but w/o medicine I am always susceptible to becoming depressed-I have bad days, but I truly enjoy my life at UPS, despite the challenges. You can, too! (And if you can't. seriously get another job, especially if you work at night. It's not worth your sanity dude/dudette!)

 

[1BROWNWRENCH]

 

[1BROWNWRENCH]

The heroin had to be a large contributing factor I would think.

...and Courtney

 

[stepitup]

We are provided with, at least in Central States, a program called "Solutions". It is part of the "Employees Assistance Program", aka EAP. You can access information to it through UPSers.com. I believe it is under "My Life and Career" tab. It is a wonderful benefit, I highly encourage anyone who is struggling with personal life and work balance issues to use it.

 

[InsideUPS]

Every time I get depressed I think to myself that it could always be worse, I could be in management. That always cheers me up.

Now this one made me laugh.

I don't think I know a more miserable group of individuals than operational management employees. Management gets abused from the Top...the Bottom..the Sides... and from "Behind" every day of the week. Almost every management person I know is set up for "failure" in one way or another. They are directed on how many employees they are permitted to work but take the beating when things don't work out so well.

So....yes...life at UPS could definitely be worse....

 

[gingerkat]

I'll go ahead and raise my hand and admit to having biochemical depression. As embarrassing as it is, I'll talk about it if it brings awareness to this terrible illness to even one person. I was probably born with it as I can remember having a major depressive episode when I was a child of 7 or 8. My fathers family, all 9 siblings suffer from depression, but I didn't know that until he died and I read his medical records.

Many people think depression has to do with jobs, money or lifestyle and for some it does, but not for the people that have a chemical imbalance. I had a career making lots of money, a good marriage and what appeared to be a good life. But, there were days I felt a deep pain that I couldn't chase away or identify. I hide my depression from everyone with my smiles, laughter and happy ways, but my inside didn't match my outside. I only sought help about 9 years ago and only now learning to accept that I have this illness.

Some days I wake up feeling terrible and I just don't know why. Hell, I do a lot to chase away these "blues". I live in sunny California and I go outside to jog, ride my bike for many miles and yet it still there some days. But yes, stress, job dissatisfaction, lifestyle changes and situational depression can absolutely kick you into a deep depression. Last year my husband of many, many years walked out the door and I didn't leave the house for almost two months. So for me, when something traumatic happens, my depression goes haywire.

I only share my story because so many people are unaware of what this illness is really about. It's not a choice, because I guarantee that no one with depression would choose it. I mean this when I say it, I would gladly exchange a limb to get get rid of this illness. Sadly, like me, many people are too embarrassed to seek out help and live with unnecessary pain. There's a good chance that some of your friends, maybe an extended family members or even a sibling are taking med's or seeking help, you just don't know it.

Good luck to OP and I hope (really and strongly hope) you seek help from an M.D.

 

[jibbs]

I used to smoke weed when I got depressed/anxious/angry, now I just listen to the music I used to listen to when I smoked weed. If music doesn't calm me down these days then I'm likely hitting the heavy bag until my knuckles are cracked and bleeding, then taking a long walk/run and passing out pretty quickly after I get back to the house. It's strange because it seems like depression, anxiety and anger are all interrelated in my psyche. If I'm depressed about something, I'm also two breaths and a wrong word away from a panic attack or just being plain old mad.

I recognize these issues before they surface these days, though. I know what makes me tick, and with that knowledge I'm able to prevent chains-of-events from spiraling out of control on me when my mind's not at it's strongest. For me, my approach to depression is all about prevention instead of reaction.

 

[rod]

I just read an email from my daughter whos husband had received yet another message from his sister saying that she don't want to live anymore. This gal is good looking, young- mid 30's, very intelligent (works as an electrical engineer when she can hold a job and insists on driving her family up a wall with her "I'm going to kill myself" routine. Shes has pulled this **** a dozen times before. She refuses to get the help she needs, goes off her medication the few times she has tried them, gets involved with abusive boyfriends and for the most part makes a hobby out of making the rest of her family miserable. All I can do is give my support to my daughter and warn her to keep this nutcase away from my grandkids. Thank God ,at least for the moment, she don't live anywhere near them but has hinted that she wants to move back home with her mother who does live close. I have talked to this gal and tried to let her know how her "drama' is affecting those closest to her but she just don't get it . Yes- I know she needs help. Yes- I know everyone should be understanding about her "condition". Yes - I know I probably come off as some kind of heartless bastard but I have had 2 close family members commit suicide and I am tired of it. I'm still pissed of at both of them for putting the rest of the family through all the sadness. You can't force those who don't want help to get it.

 

[gingerkat]

I just read an email from my daughter whos husband had received yet another message from his sister saying that she don't want to live anymore. This gal is good looking, young- mid 30's, very intelligent (works as an electrical engineer when she can hold a job and insists on driving her family up a wall with her "I'm going to kill myself" routine. Shes has pulled this **** a dozen times before. She refuses to get the help she needs, goes off her medication the few times she has tried them, gets involved with abusive boyfriends and for the most part makes a hobby out of making the rest of her family miserable. All I can do is give my support to my daughter and warn her to keep this nutcase away from my grandkids. Thank God ,at least for the moment, she don't live anywhere near them but has hinted that she wants to move back home with her mother who does live close. I have talked to this gal and tried to let her know how her "drama' is affecting those closest to her but she just don't get it . Yes- I know she needs help. Yes- I know everyone should be understanding about her "condition". Yes - I know I probably come off as some kind of heartless bastard but I have had 2 close family members commit suicide and I am tired of it. I'm still pissed of at both of them for putting the rest of the family through all the sadness. You can't force those who don't want help to get it.

You're right, it's one thing to be understanding, but it's another thing to hold people "hostage". To me you are not coming off as heartless, you're coming across as concerned for your loved ones. Actually, my therapist would probably tell you that you're right on. If she claims she's going to kill herself, call 911 and give them her address and let the professionals deal with her. They'll 5150 her and evaluate her situation and it probably will be the best for her.

A lot of people that suffer from forms of depression go off med's frequently because it's a fact that it takes a minimum of 4-6 weeks for a medication to work or I should say to know if it works. It's also now recommended that a combination of medication and CBT is found to be beneficial over medication alone. They always tell us that mediation is just a tool, but you have to use that tool right. One of the reasons for CBT is so we can try to use these methods to helps us with our triggers and to know when it's time to make critical phone calls.

I used to go to group therapy every day and you would be surprised at how many people refused or didn't take their medication correctly. It's sad because everyone wanted to get better, but they would be very frustrated with the medication. So many of them come with terrible side effects or they just don't work. Psychiatric med's are a crap shoot and have to be swapped out so many times to find the right one. I used to tell them that I thought the doc's at my medical facility were in bed with the pharmaceutical companies.

But, good for you Rod. I'm glad you're so supportive of your daughter and her family. This gal needs help, but not from her brother or his family. You sound like a wonderful papa!

 

[packageguy]

With all the challenges we face everyday, I wonder how many of us suffer from mild to severe depression. There are so many negitives out there: Long hours, harrassment, contract rumors, customers, not enough time at home, rising gas prices,bills, taxes....in a average day we all are faced with numerous stressfull situations. Does anyone feel depressed? If so what do you do to cope with it.

welcome to brown cafe i try not to think about it much just get in my truck and my thing

 

[1BROWNWRENCH]

I used to smoke weed when I got depressed/anxious/angry, now I just listen to the music I used to listen to when I smoked weed. If music doesn't calm me down these days then I'm likely hitting the heavy bag until my knuckles are cracked and bleeding, then taking a long walk/run and passing out pretty quickly after I get back to the house. It's strange because it seems like depression, anxiety and anger are all interrelated in my psyche. If I'm depressed about something, I'm also two breaths and a wrong word away from a panic attack or just being plain old mad.

I recognize these issues before they surface these days, though. I know what makes me tick, and with that knowledge I'm able to prevent chains-of-events from spiraling out of control on me when my mind's not at it's strongest. For me, my approach to depression is all about prevention instead of reaction.

I know the short fuse feeling. Not a good symptom here.

 

[serenity now]

With all the challenges we face everyday, I wonder how many of us suffer from mild to severe depression. There are so many negitives out there: Long hours, harrassment, contract rumors, customers, not enough time at home, rising gas prices,bills, taxes....in a average day we all are faced with numerous stressfull situations. Does anyone feel depressed? If so what do you do to cope with it.

that's why they call it work

 

[stink219]

With all the challenges we face everyday, I wonder how many of us suffer from mild to severe depression. There are so many negitives out there: Long hours, harrassment, contract rumors, customers, not enough time at home, rising gas prices,bills, taxes....in a average day we all are faced with numerous stressfull situations. Does anyone feel depressed? If so what do you do to cope with it.

I suffered from depression for a few years after I became employed with UPS. I saw many doctors, took many meds, talked it out. Nothing seemed to help. After about a year of that, I stopped everything. And I'm sorry to those that suffer from it, but I now feel that depression is all in the "perception" of how we view things. It is a processing of individual thought. Once you accept everything that's positive in your life and reject negative thought processes you will instantly start to feel better. We have 25,000 to 50,000 thoughts a day. You need to start to change a significant portion of those into positive thoughts. Use active reasoning. When your feeling depressed, dissect that thought. Once you identify the negative process you can then be aware of the "pattern". I used to think I was always working, no time for family, fun, things that I enjoyed. I was too focused on the negative. Once I started thinking of the things that UPS afforded me, a home, a boat, vacations, fancy restaurants, money, it all got better. UPS's work motivation model is surrounded by negative reinforcement but It's in our ability to change the perception of our minds in an instant. My close UPS buddy was depressed about not being able to see his daughter in plays, at ballet, gymnastics, all other activities during the week. We talked about it a bit, and once he started thinking that all this extra stuff cost a good amount of monthly tuitions and dues, he realized that if he wasn't working to make up the money, he still wouldn't see his daughter in the activities because he wouldn't afford it. Now who would suffer? The daughter! There is no other motivator in life than your own childen. Correct?
So in abbreviated terms, think of negativity as a bully that always tries to beat you up, put you down and stomp on you. You just need to wake up one day, kick his friend-cking and he will never bother you again. Try it. Worked for me. I hope it helps.

 

[brownboyups]

old school...few coors lights after work and everything feels better
if you let any manager at UPS get into your head your mentally weak...you have problems
do your job...take there money and go home (never take the job home)
if your doing stuff at work u shouldn't be doing u should worry (i hope u get caught)
if u do your job just not as fast as they want (*** em)
24 years at UPS

worked a 10.5 day (3-12-13)...+$360.96...that's not excessive OT...thats a great day and food on the table
ask the guy that can't find a job if excessive OT is a deal breaker on getting a job
anyone that works for UPS knows u give up time with your family to make great money (can't have it both ways)

just my opinion (remember coors light)

 

[gingerkat]

^^^^
I know you're just trying to help, but remember alcohol is a depressant. Sorry, I know you're being light hearted, I just take things of this nature seriously.

 

[toonertoo]

I suffered from depression for a few years after I became employed with UPS. I saw many doctors, took many meds, talked it out. Nothing seemed to help. After about a year of that, I stopped everything. And I'm sorry to those that suffer from it, but I now feel that depression is all in the "perception" of how we view things. It is a processing of individual thought. Once you accept everything that's positive in your life and reject negative thought processes you will instantly start to feel better. We have 25,000 to 50,000 thoughts a day. You need to start to change a significant portion of those into positive thoughts. Use active reasoning. When your feeling depressed, dissect that thought. Once you identify the negative process you can then be aware of the "pattern". I used to think I was always working, no time for family, fun, things that I enjoyed. I was too focused on the negative. Once I started thinking of the things that UPS afforded me, a home, a boat, vacations, fancy restaurants, money, it all got better. UPS's work motivation model is surrounded by negative reinforcement but It's in our ability to change the perception of our minds in an instant. My close UPS buddy was depressed about not being able to see his daughter in plays, at ballet, gymnastics, all other activities during the week. We talked about it a bit, and once he started thinking that all this extra stuff cost a good amount of monthly tuitions and dues, he realized that if he wasn't working to make up the money, he still wouldn't see his daughter in the activities because he wouldn't afford it. Now who would suffer? The daughter! There is no other motivator in life than your own childen. Correct?
So in abbreviated terms, think of negativity as a bully that always tries to beat you up, put you down and stomp on you. You just need to wake up one day, kick his friend-cking and he will never bother you again. Try it. Worked for me. I hope it helps.

This works well for regular depression, not chemical imbalance. Not clinical depression. There is a huge difference

 

[Brownslave688]

I just read an email from my daughter whos husband had received yet another message from his sister saying that she don't want to live anymore. This gal is good looking, young- mid 30's, very intelligent (works as an electrical engineer when she can hold a job and insists on driving her family up a wall with her "I'm going to kill myself" routine. Shes has pulled this **** a dozen times before. She refuses to get the help she needs, goes off her medication the few times she has tried them, gets involved with abusive boyfriends and for the most part makes a hobby out of making the rest of her family miserable. All I can do is give my support to my daughter and warn her to keep this nutcase away from my grandkids. Thank God ,at least for the moment, she don't live anywhere near them but has hinted that she wants to move back home with her mother who does live close. I have talked to this gal and tried to let her know how her "drama' is affecting those closest to her but she just don't get it . Yes- I know she needs help. Yes- I know everyone should be understanding about her "condition". Yes - I know I probably come off as some kind of heartless bastard but I have had 2 close family members commit suicide and I am tired of it. I'm still pissed of at both of them for putting the rest of the family through all the sadness. You can't force those who don't want help to get it.

my wife's brother has tried to kill himself a few times. Last time he called my wife and said he was going to do it. I was beyond pissed. Someone who wants to kill themselves doesn't call someone else and say they are going to do it.


Its really hard for me to comprehend. The thought has literally never even crossed my mind. Don't understand how it would cross someone's mind that that's the only option. Closest I've had to suicidal thoughts was hoping for a broken arm in junior high so I could get some sympathy from the ladies.