Dirty Fun (that's what she said...)

Discussion in 'UPS Discussions' started by Mr.Grey, Sep 4, 2009.

  1. Mr.Grey

    Mr.Grey New Member

    Your best ups inside lingo that we all love .

    Here is some of mine .

    I'm just going to stick it in your can. (air hub)
    my package is just to big to fit.
    just bang the slot and it will slide in.
  2. soberups

    soberups Pees in the brown Koolaid

    The postman always rings twice...

    but the UPS man comes 3 times!
  3. faded jeans

    faded jeans just a member

    Do you take deliveries in the front or the rear?
  4. Big Babooba

    Big Babooba Well-Known Member

    Driver Released - Back Door!!!:wink2:
  5. retired2000

    retired2000 Active Member

    cover driver to a customer "are you a pick-up?"
  6. Mike23

    Mike23 Guest

    Sorry your package came late, I was touching it all day if it makes you feel better.
  7. trplnkl

    trplnkl 555

    From a consignee that meets you at the door...I saw you coming.
  8. City Driver

    City Driver New Member

    how is this not just as offensive as my ellen degeneres joke

    where is upstateupser the politically correct internet cop at?
  9. klein

    klein Für Meno :)

    Delivered light-bulbs.
    Told the lady, I came to brighten up your life.

    She was with another 3 girls ( a business), asked me: " are ya ?"
    I said, sure, brought you some new lights.

    She looked at my feet. Said : Well, you got a good shoe size, you might just work.

    What a laughter... and did I ever get red faced.
  10. UpstateNYUPSer

    UpstateNYUPSer Very proud grandfather.

    In North Carolina with my son visiting my daughter/his sister.
  11. rod

    rod retired and happy

    The Ellen joke was no where near these. I guess it boils down to just what side of the bed some people get out of on any particular day. :sad-little:

    My contribution:
    I have a big package for you- where would you like me to put it:wink2:
  12. Monkey Butt

    Monkey Butt You can call me Chappy Staff Member

    Thanks for clarifying that.
  13. cachsux

    cachsux Wah

    "You sure that big things going to fit in there?"
    Female customer as I made her pickup with a 53" trailer instead of the 28" trailer the regular driver brings.

    "Sure,a little butter and it`ll slide right in.'
    My reply.
  14. code5

    code5 Member

    I once had a female co-worker give me an air package and she said "It came on the can". I did my best to contain my laughter until she left. As soon as she did another one of my co-workers said "I hope the door was closed"!!

    One of our clerks was on our driver sort and load and she was mad that one of the drivers were giving her a hard time. Unaware, she said "Why do you guys always come on my face instead of behind my back". She meant we were mean to her behind her back instead of right to her. We were all trying to hide our histerics. When she realized what she said she laughed and called us all purverts even though she did all the talking.
  15. MC4YOU2

    MC4YOU2 Yep, not wearing brown anymore

    Secretary during delivery asks me after I took over a retired drivers route.
    "Will you come like Jim did if I put the sign in the window? I mean again?" I just nod yes and quickly retreat to the truck and drive away with the biggest grin for the rest of the day!
  16. NickJames

    NickJames New Member

    I saw from far away that you had a really big package!
  17. dilligaf

    dilligaf IN VINO VERITAS

    I don't think it's a matter of what side of the bed one gets out of, maybe it's more a matter of what one is not getting in bed. Imagination is just not enough. :ohmy: And it's taken out on others who were supposedly friends.
  18. over9five

    over9five Senior Member Staff Member

    I just don't see the use of a 53 OR a 28 inch trailer....
  19. dilligaf

    dilligaf IN VINO VERITAS

    Depends on your point of view Over! 53 or 28 inches might be to much. :wink2:
  20. The English language is so nicely ambiguous/ambivalent, but it happens in other languages too. It all has to be seen in the context of circumstances or how it was SUPPOSED to be perceived. sometimes people talk two different kinds of English, so it could be misunderstood/misconstrued.
    Worked once in a pet food research company (developing new products for cats and dogs), so whenever we said :
    " Wir machen alles fuer die Katz" (literal translation " We do everything for the cats") it really meant : "We do everything in vain." (the exact opposite).
    Therefore "Hony soit qui mal y pense" (Its literal translation from Old French is "Shame be to him who thinks evil of it"), and this is the motto of one of the highest orders in the United Kingdom, the Order of the Garter) or 'Shame on him, who suspects illicit motivation'
    English is not my native tongue, but sometimes I am given the opportunity to massage it a little bit. And then it is fun.