Divorce/Pension Question

klein

klein

Für Meno :)
No, but basically 50% of what her spouse made in those marriage years !
And she only seeks out richer guys.

Probably learned that from Hollywood and Entertainment tonight/Peoples magazine.
 
Big Babooba

Big Babooba

Well-Known Member
UpstateNYUPSer said:
The 2% for every year of marriage while employed at UPS is a New York law, not a pension rule. We have the option here of either using the Teamster approved lawyer or we receive a set amount from the union if we decide to use our own lawyer to help offset the cost--I think it is $1,000 which, as well all know, will not buy much legal representation. I did not get in to division of assets, child support or other issues as the OP did not ask about any of these.

50% of the pension for the years worked at UPS during the marriage? Wow.
Click to expand...
Not wow - OW!!!
 
D

Divorce Sucks

New Member
Divorce sucks. I loved my UPS'er, the brutality of the workdays left little of him after work, and the hyped day led to hyped evenings and weekends. He could never really stop the freight train of the working hours. I always got how exhausted and frustrated he was, kept me waiting for a better day for years. I knew core him was a very good man. Living under that stress really smashed my self esteem, his anger was always there, and after a while it was hard not to have a wall up when he was home, protective and defensive, waiting for the next angry minute, hour, week.

At pandemic, all broke loose, sparing details, insistence for therapy was met with divorce papers. I still don't think he understood that once a divorce is initiated, It takes on a life of it's own. Very little chance to stop divorce once papers are filed. I will always be sad that my lifelong friend became so different, distant, angry, spiteful. At 60 it's doubtful either of us will find a lifelong partner, there for the good and the bad days. 2 years of lawyers, wasted court time, and finally divorce and settlement, The cost was huge, My grandchildren lost the only grandpa they knew, my mom died in my home, on hospice, during the divorce process. She never understood it, she loved him, too.

Man, therapy would have been cheaper and likely wouldn't have shaved years from both of our lifespans. If you can make it work, do it, or at least try. Promise, the grass may seem greener somewhere else, but once the marriage is hopelessly gone in divorce and tens of thousands of dollars wasted, that green grass will be brown, and possibly sad and lonely. UPS does exact a toll, if te job can be left at work, if the people in our lives matter first, what comes from that can ease the nastiest day out alone it a brown truck in dangerous heat or cold. No amount of settlement would replace my husband, no amount of money will replace the loss of what was and could possibly again, have been a good marriage.
 
542thruNthru

542thruNthru

Well-Known Member
Divorce Sucks said:
Divorce sucks. I loved my UPS'er, the brutality of the workdays left little of him after work, and the hyped day led to hyped evenings and weekends. He could never really stop the freight train of the working hours. I always got how exhausted and frustrated he was, kept me waiting for a better day for years. I knew core him was a very good man. Living under that stress really smashed my self esteem, his anger was always there, and after a while it was hard not to have a wall up when he was home, protective and defensive, waiting for the next angry minute, hour, week.

At pandemic, all broke loose, sparing details, insistence for therapy was met with divorce papers. I still don't think he understood that once a divorce is initiated, It takes on a life of it's own. Very little chance to stop divorce once papers are filed. I will always be sad that my lifelong friend became so different, distant, angry, spiteful. At 60 it's doubtful either of us will find a lifelong partner, there for the good and the bad days. 2 years of lawyers, wasted court time, and finally divorce and settlement, The cost was huge, My grandchildren lost the only grandpa they knew, my mom died in my home, on hospice, during the divorce process. She never understood it, she loved him, too.

Man, therapy would have been cheaper and likely wouldn't have shaved years from both of our lifespans. If you can make it work, do it, or at least try. Promise, the grass may seem greener somewhere else, but once the marriage is hopelessly gone in divorce and tens of thousands of dollars wasted, that green grass will be brown, and possibly sad and lonely. UPS does exact a toll, if te job can be left at work, if the people in our lives matter first, what comes from that can ease the nastiest day out alone it a brown truck in dangerous heat or cold. No amount of settlement would replace my husband, no amount of money will replace the loss of what was and could possibly again, have been a good marriage.
Click to expand...
60 years old and getting divorced. Sorry to hear that. He should have just retired.
 
Wally

Wally

BrownCafe Innovator & King of Puns
jeepjk09 said:
My son has worked for UPS for 16 years and has been married 16 years. He's going through a divorce and is being told he has to give the wife 50% of the pension earned up to the date of divorce. Has anyone gone through this? He was also told she would get the money in a lump sum after the divorce because he would have to withdraw it from the fund. Is that even possible? Someone else told us that she would just get a percentage of it when he retires. Anyone have any input on this subject? He works for UPS in Arizona. Thanks
Click to expand...
So my agreement says she doesn't collect until I retire. Every day I work now is sweet revenge. I got a letter from her lawyer some time back reminding me of this agreement so I know she was counting on the checks! Lol, it really is sweet.
 
Non sequitur

Non sequitur

Well-Known Member
Divorce Sucks said:
Divorce sucks. I loved my UPS'er, the brutality of the workdays left little of him after work, and the hyped day led to hyped evenings and weekends. He could never really stop the freight train of the working hours. I always got how exhausted and frustrated he was, kept me waiting for a better day for years. I knew core him was a very good man. Living under that stress really smashed my self esteem, his anger was always there, and after a while it was hard not to have a wall up when he was home, protective and defensive, waiting for the next angry minute, hour, week.

At pandemic, all broke loose, sparing details, insistence for therapy was met with divorce papers. I still don't think he understood that once a divorce is initiated, It takes on a life of it's own. Very little chance to stop divorce once papers are filed. I will always be sad that my lifelong friend became so different, distant, angry, spiteful. At 60 it's doubtful either of us will find a lifelong partner, there for the good and the bad days. 2 years of lawyers, wasted court time, and finally divorce and settlement, The cost was huge, My grandchildren lost the only grandpa they knew, my mom died in my home, on hospice, during the divorce process. She never understood it, she loved him, too.

Man, therapy would have been cheaper and likely wouldn't have shaved years from both of our lifespans. If you can make it work, do it, or at least try. Promise, the grass may seem greener somewhere else, but once the marriage is hopelessly gone in divorce and tens of thousands of dollars wasted, that green grass will be brown, and possibly sad and lonely. UPS does exact a toll, if te job can be left at work, if the people in our lives matter first, what comes from that can ease the nastiest day out alone it a brown truck in dangerous heat or cold. No amount of settlement would replace my husband, no amount of money will replace the loss of what was and could possibly again, have been a good marriage.
Click to expand...
A very accurate description of the damage a stressful, physical career can cause. I see it as analogous to NFL defenseman that plays angry. Its the energy that he feeds off. Its what makes him great. Unfortunately doesn't make for a pleasant home life. Wishing you a peaceful life.
 
542thruNthru

542thruNthru

Well-Known Member
Wally said:
So my agreement says she doesn't collect until I retire. Every day I work now is sweet revenge. I got a letter from her lawyer some time back reminding me of this agreement so I know she was counting on the checks! Lol, it really is sweet.
Click to expand...
Even if she remarries?
 

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