Former UPS pilot-Child molester

[dannyboy]

Interesting thread.

While young, I watched a news report about a couple of guys serving life. They were given life because at that time that particular state repealed their death sentences.

These guys had already raped and killed several people. They were sadists. One guy said his biggest thrill would be to shank an guard through the cell bars, and watch him struggle to get to the phone for help.

IMHO, there are some human beings that refuse to act like human beings, and treat others around them like humans. In those cases, they need to be treated like the animals they are and done away with, to where they no longer pose a threat to society.

I do understand that that flies in the face of what is taught in the Bible, but there also needs to be a mechanism to rid society of those types of animals.

JMHO
d

 

[dilligaf]

Dill, BB, AJ et all

If stats are correct, one fourth of the posters here at BC were molested as children. Mostly by people within the family, uncles, cousins, fathers, mothers......yes, boys are molested as well. Most try to shrug it off as "getting some early on", but it hurts non the less.

I totally agree with the "why dont you give so and so a hug" is a bad sign. If you have to tell your child to show affection toward someone, and it is not freely given, there might be a problem. Never ever force a child to show affection to anyone. Never ever. Big mistake.

To those that have suffered, peace comes if you let it. But as Regan said, trust but verify. Always.

My kids hate it, but thats life.

d

Danny, your words mean alot to me. I know you have dealt with many kids in your life and those kids have been blessed to have you both. I wish I had been that fortunate but I was fortunate enough to have gotten out without losing myself.

Peace is coming, little by little.

 

[trplnkl]

Yes, elected officials. I doubt very seriously that they are courting the pedophile vote.

You're probably right, however they aren't courting the victims of violence either.
And pray tell, what makes elected officials qualified to decide what is proper punishment for this kind of atrocity?
They got to where they are (most of the time) by outspending their opponents or because their family has been in politics for generations. Can you remember a politician from your state ever vowing to make sure the punishment phases fit the crime? I can't recall even ONE in my adult years.

 

[stevetheupsguy]

Yes, elected officials. I doubt very seriously that they are courting the pedophile vote.

Or are they? Pedophiles aren't just creepy bums on the street that are easily identified. They can easily be your Mom, Dad, Priest, Best Friend or Co-Worker and you would never know it until they got caught, IF THEY GOT CAUGHT.

Let me tell you all a little story. I used to live with a girl and her daughter. This girl was a Corrections Deputy and she had to work odd hours. Sometimes she would leave her daughter at her folks house, with me or with friends of her folks. One day while I was watching her, we started playing a game. I would hold her upside down and touch her feet to the ceiling and start saying, ooh, I'm gonna tell your Mom that you were dancing on the ceiling. She got a big kick out of this game.

One day while playing, her pants came down a bit and when I set her down and started adjusting them I started saying, you can't let your pants come down because no one is supposed to see your panties or private parts except for Mom. She then started saying the Grandpa puts his hand in her pants and rubs her. I was AGHAST, because I knew her Grandpa and he seemed like such a wonderful guy.

I immediately reported what she told me to her Mom. We further found out that it wasn't her actual Grandpa, but the friends of my girlfriends parents. The man whom she referred to as Grandpa with the mustache, had been molesting her since she was an infant. She was 4 years old at this point. We reported this to the Police, who arrested and tried the man. I believe he received little more than a year and like 15 years of probation. He actual moved her from Mass., where he had been molesting his own daughters when they were growing up. Just think, had I not been at the right place at the right time, this could still be going on.

So you see, it's not just the people that look the part. Dannyboy stated that 1 in 4 of us BC'ers has lived through this abuse. I'll go even further and bet that there are pedophiles in our audience. Please be aware of where your children are and what they are doing. Predators are watching and waiting to take away their innocence.

BTW, I'm proud of you folks that stepped up in this thread. I don't think everyone needs to shout from the rooftops, though you can keep a watchful eye from your area.

 

[ajblakejr]

OMG I had no HELL. I am not traumitized, I am a survivor but not like you all.
PLEASE, it does not even compare. I am so sorry you all didnt have a great child life, and some person took away that love and safeness children deserve away. And all I can say is every time I read this over, I cry for all of you.

Have a great weekend all.

toonertoo

Thank you.

My Uncle was the beast.
My parents loved me.
I had a great childhood...it was what my Uncle did to me that sucked.
I put these too different things in different rooms in my brain.

It was hard for my father...hell...he was afraid to hug me after I these big boobies arrived overnight when I was in fifth grade...then he was home for the the biggest fear a father has when my mom was having knee surgery...having to deal with that "thing".

I just want everyone to know and I will repeat it...

Most of the time it is a Family Member or a trusted friend that does this to a child.

Please do not force, expect, push, etc, your child into showing affection for any adult.

Ban these words...Go give Uncle a hug and a kiss goodbye.

 

[trinity]

sad story. . . Makes you want to lock up your kiddies away from anyone.

 

[bbsam]

You're probably right, however they aren't courting the victims of violence either.
And pray tell, what makes elected officials qualified to decide what is proper punishment for this kind of atrocity?
They got to where they are (most of the time) by outspending their opponents or because their family has been in politics for generations. Can you remember a politician from your state ever vowing to make sure the punishment phases fit the crime? I can't recall even ONE in my adult years.

Because we entrust them to decide the proper punishment. Would you leave it to the victims? What of the surviving victim who would rather forgive the offender? We could see murderers walk free on the religious convictions of family members. While that is extreme, I would submit that vengeance, though emotionally justifiable, would run in the same vein and thus bring about an outcome other than justice. In fact it is "rule of law" that brings about a cool and methodical meeting out of justice.

 

[dannyboy]

Sorry to see your first post had to be on this subject.

BTW, welcome.

Dill

Children are resilient if allowed. There are a lot of things that they can overcome if supported properly. It mostly centers on parents and family, as to the extent of the healing of the wound.

Reminds me of a child in Vietnam. Parents broke the child's leg, and left it to beg where our GI's would see it.

Our guys brought in in for care, and it was set and pinned. Shortly after release, the child was back as a beggar with the leg broken again, by the parents, so she could beg.

While not as obvious, some parents have real problems in dealing with the fact that their child was molested "under their watch". And at times, when the offending person is a close family member, it makes the whole soup of issues even worse.

Some parents need counseling worse than the child (I really think most, but that is my personal observation). And because they dont know how to properly address issues and problems, they make it worse, and in some cases, much worse. And when that happens, there is no chance of ever healing to the point where normal life begins. And that is such a shame. Its almost like the child is the one at fault for ripping a family apart, and to the child, they feel responsible.

And that is if the parent is not the offender, so you can only imagine how bad it gets when they are. (or in the cases of some of the posters here, you know)

Unfortunately, child abuse (sexual abuse, child exploitation etc) has been around since the cave man. Unfortunately as well, our punishment system for that type of offense is still in the stone age as well.

That being said, Child sexual abuse false arrests are very common.

Take my neighbor. He was married, had two sons. Wife was screwing around with a guy, and she wanted to leave. She also wanted the boys, so she swore out abuse charges against the dad. They arrested him and place him in jail pending additional charges.

The new boyfriend told the mother he was not interested in dealing with her bas&#$^$ kids. So the mother, two days after she swore out the charges, recanted, and gave the father full custody of the boys.

That was almost two years ago, he still has the boys. The state never has charged the mother with anything. And the arrest still appears on his record when pulled. And now, on top of all that, he is dealing with brain cancer.

Personally, I think that mother ought to be in jail for quite a while, if we lived in a fair world, with justice for all.....

Sorry for the rant, but abuse is a tender subject for a lot of people, me included.

d

 

[wannabeups]

You so right! The woman should be brought up on charges. How any woman could chose a man over her kids is beyond me.

If I was the guy I would kick her ARSE to the curb. I don't have any interest in ANY woman who does NOT put HER KIDS FIRST. One thing you have to remember, KIDS DID NOT ASK TO BE BROUGHT INTO THIS WORLD.

A woman who would chose a man over her own kids tells me right about the bat that she only cares about HERSELF and once she gets tired of you will do the same thing to you.

 

[toonertoo]

Yes I guess you are right Danny, but I think as many who get found guilty and are not, may not match the ones who are found not and are.
I can see, have seen how this can be used as manipulation. I also dont think if a 3 yr old tells you someone did something to them that they should have no knowledge of, that they are lying. They are innocent they speak their mind, out of the mouth of babes. Yes everyone gets a trial. That goes without saying. And I also think people who bring false allegations should hang. But those who are guilty, hang them as fast as you can.
Such as that Cooney guy who killed Jessica Lundsford. Those people should never be released, the repeat offense is to high, they cannot be fixed. You can whack off the tallywhacker, that dont fix the brain.
It isnt about sex, its about power, and its about time they pay with capital punishment.

 

[dilligaf]

Danny,

rant on! please..................... don't stop Danny. Don't ever stop.


This is/was a good thing. In the end this thread is/was a good thing. I have no regrets about saying what I did. Someone asked me, 'what if someone tried to use this information against you?'. This was asked out of sincere concern and care for my well being. I could not give an answer. For the life of me I cannot fathom why someone would try. But, it is not out of the realm of possibility. After all, look at what we are talking about to begin with. Anything is possible. It is a sad thing.


For me, one of the biggest contributing factors to being taken out of the situation was the intervention of another person. I have no doubt that that intervention saved me. I was on my way to being lost for good. I know that in my heart as well as I know the inside of my eyelids. I said before that I was drinking. At about 10 yrs old. I, to this day, cannot even stand the smell of vodka and orange juice. I got so drunk one night that I probably was very (extremely) close to alcohol poisoning. I went through most of my early 20's like this though not to that extreme. It's not like that now. For that I am greatful. See, the other thing that I believe goes hand in hand with this is alcoholism. No, I can't give any statistics. I know my father was an alcoholic.

I have been writing this for like the last hour and up until just now I have not struggled to keep the tears out of my eyes. Up until now I did not really think or believe that anyone would ever care what happened to me or us. Realising that has brought the tears. There are so many facets and aspects to this. Not many care to know or even want to take the time. I am having a hard time trusting that this won't come back to bite me in unexpected ways. But I'll be damned if I can stop it. Nor do I want to.

 

[dannyboy]

Tears are good for the soul. So is an open dialog on the subject.

I had a situation not too many years ago where there was a group at McDonald's. Several men with their children, while their wives had a "girls night out". There were several other groups of children there as well, including two boys belonging to one of our feeder drivers. 5 and 7 I believe.

One of the young children in our group was three years old. After a while climbing in the upper parts of the play ground, she began to call for her father, repeatedly. One of the other guys there was asked by the father to go check on what was wrong, and did so. He went to the top of the playground, and returned with the girl. As he went up, I went to get a drink refill, and he was back down before I returned, and he had taken her to her father and whispering with him. The father and daughter then abruptly left.

I questioned the guy later in private as we were leaving, as to what was wrong. He stated that as he got to the top of the playground, in the top "tree house" the two boys were trying to remove the little girls panties, and she was trying to resist. I dont know why he did not confront the father of the two boys that had tried to assault his daughter, as that would have been the normal thing to do.

Fast forward almost 30 days. The father announces that his three year old said that the guy that went up to rescue her was trying to pull her panties down to play with her "gina", and that he was seeking to file charges.

Well, being a former foster parent, and a witness to the whole situation, I could not really legally speak to any of the people involved, neither friend, or the feeder driver. What I did do was to suggest that the guy that went up to help her down, that he see a forensic psychologist.

Anyway, after a lengthy investigation by the Department of human services into the matter, they did not find any evidence that it had happened, nor did intensive interviews with the child suggest that the guy had any inappropriate contact.

What it did do was brand the guy that had been trying to be helpful for the rest of his life. For you see, many applications that deal with sensitive jobs ask if you have even been accused of anything involving a child, or inappropriate sexual contact.

I did speak with several of the people involved, including the forensic guy, and the one glaring item was the fact that the three year old used the term "gina" when referring to the whole episode. Very age inappropriate. While it did send up red flags about what was going on in the home, nothing was ever done.

As a witness to the whole thing, I can say for certain that the guy left to get her down at the same time I left for a refile. Before I got back, he was already down and speaking with the father. There was no way that he even had the time to do what he was accused of. But the damage was done.

One thing parents need to do is listen to their children. Not only what they say, but listen to the body language. It can tell you volumes as to what is going on in the group your child is in. Then once you feel like something is wrong, get some professional help. Many times parents, in their zeal to find out and protect, end up doing damage to the child, or influencing the story. Its best to let those that investigate this professionally do their job.

Tooner, yes, there are some guilty that go free. Well sort of. The fact that they have been accused will forever haunt them. For some people, in their circle of friends, that is not a big deal. But for others, they might as well have been found guilty, as that is the way our society treats them anyway.

d

 

[ajblakejr]

Tears are good for the soul. So is an open dialog on the subject.


One thing parents need to do is listen to their children. Not only what they say, but listen to the body language. It can tell you volumes as to what is going on in the group your child is in. Then once you feel like something is wrong, get some professional help.
d

Please listen to the body lanuage.

 

[trplnkl]

Because we entrust them to decide the proper punishment. Would you leave it to the victims? What of the surviving victim who would rather forgive the offender? We could see murderers walk free on the religious convictions of family members. While that is extreme, I would submit that vengeance, though emotionally justifiable, would run in the same vein and thus bring about an outcome other than justice. In fact it is "rule of law" that brings about a cool and methodical meeting out of justice.

No sir, actually we don't entrust them to make that decision, it just kind of falls in with the job. I don't remember ever voting for a "law maker" based on their stance on judicial punishment. Do you? The overwhelming fact remains that punishment of broken laws vary from state to state. How is that appropriate? Some of these varying laws are determined by bleeding hearts that feel that a child molester shouldn't be be punished because "obviously they had a bad childhood themselves, how could they be responsible". What rubbish. Yet the child's personal hell crosses state lines.
Of course I can see that you are more than likely one of those BH, so I'll not address you again and save my energy.

 

[bbsam]

No sir, actually we don't entrust them to make that decision, it just kind of falls in with the job. I don't remember ever voting for a "law maker" based on their stance on judicial punishment. Do you? The overwhelming fact remains that punishment of broken laws vary from state to state. How is that appropriate? Some of these varying laws are determined by bleeding hearts that feel that a child molester shouldn't be be punished because "obviously they had a bad childhood themselves, how could they be responsible". What rubbish. Yet the child's personal hell crosses state lines.
Of course I can see that you are more than likely one of those BH, so I'll not address you again and save my energy.

Lawmakers are not voted on based on crime and punishment issues? Ever hear of Willie Horton? Can you name the mentally retarded individual who was put to death in Arkansas in large part because Bill Clinton needed to appear tough on crime? Know why Rudy Giullianni was so popular when he was first elected as Mayor of New York? Was the "War on Drugs" anything more than ramping up of criminal punishment?

Why is punishment that varies from state to state a problem? Justice Scalia would probably say states rights ensures that the "bleedin hearts" hold sway in California and the "red necks" get Texas.

"obviousy they had a bad childhood..." is a thought process not so much by a bleeding heart, but any halfway decent defense attorney doing his best to defend his client (regardless of how repulsive) to the best of his ability as provided by the Constitution. It is a question that would be posed in jury selection.

But do not bother wasting your energy with me anymore. Go join the rest of the teabag crowd with your irrational bloviations. Just pick your knucles up off the ground...it's embarrassing.

 

[MrFedEx]

Yes, elected officials. I doubt very seriously that they are courting the pedophile vote.

I come from a family that is full of police, and according to them, pedophiles very carefully choose where they live. In other words, they research which states are lax on child molestation and which are "hang-em' high". This information is readily available to them on websites that they frequent.

So, your elected officials actually do "court" the pedophile vote when they shoot-down laws that would execute, castrate, or imprison these monsters forever.

 

[Dis-organized Labor]

I come from a family that is full of police, and according to them, pedophiles very carefully choose where they live. In other words, they research which states are lax on child molestation and which are "hang-em' high". This information is readily available to them on websites that they frequent.

So, your elected officials actually do "court" the pedophile vote when they shoot-down laws that would execute, castrate, or imprison these monsters forever.

My "Family" was split between my Mother and Father.
I stayed with my Mother only because my baby sister cried so much when the Judge asked us where we wanted to go. I had to stay with her.

She was murdered in 1999 in PA by Troy Drumheller. He is now on Death Row where he belongs.

 

[bbsam]

I come from a family that is full of police, and according to them, pedophiles very carefully choose where they live. In other words, they research which states are lax on child molestation and which are "hang-em' high". This information is readily available to them on websites that they frequent.

So, your elected officials actually do "court" the pedophile vote when they shoot-down laws that would execute, castrate, or imprison these monsters forever.

I would be interested to see emperical evidence of your assertions. But even with that the assertion that politicians "court the pedophile vote" remains simply ridiculous. That would mean that lax states would see a huge number of pedophiles. "Hang-'em high" states would not even have to deal with the filth. Pedophiles would gravitiate to the soft states in such numbers as to cause panic and alarm. None of that seems to be happening.

But really, to me the question is tangental. Simply put, I am willing to let the law deal with criminals. I may not like it, but in civil society that is the price we pay. And though Politician "A" might be a "Hang-'em high" type, he may also have political views that I could never support. So how much weght does one issue hold in electing officials?

 

[stevetheupsguy]

WHOA!!! Why don't you guys start a new thread about politics and pedophiles. This one is about a Former UPS pilot that got 25 years for molesting kids. You people are spinning off on a tangent. I'm just sayin!

 

[toonertoo]

My "Family" was split between my Mother and Father.
I stayed with my Mother only because my baby sister cried so much when the Judge asked us where we wanted to go. I had to stay with her.

She was murdered in 1999 in PA by Troy Drumheller. He is now on Death Row where he belongs.

Im so sorry for your loss. How awful.