Good Quotes

moreluck

golden ticket member
People will accept your ideas much more readily if you tell them that Benjamin Franklin said it first.

Good news is just life's way of keeping you off balance.

If it ain't broke, fix it till it is.

I'm not afraid of heights...I'm afraid of widths.

The best things in life are free....or have no interest or payments for one full year.

A man wants a gal in his arms, but not on his hands.
 

moreluck

golden ticket member
Here's a new invention -- a solar-powered clothes dryer. It's called a clothes line.

The practice of putting women on pedestals began to die out when it was discovered that they could give orders better from there.

A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.

The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.

"Humans can always be counted on to assert with vigor their God- given right to be stupid." (Dean Koontz in False Memory)
 

moreluck

golden ticket member
"Some people grow up and spread cheer. You just grew up and spread."

Nobody can be just like me. Even I have trouble.

My husband begged me to be practical...Thank God I lived by my credo: 'Veni, vidi, Visa' - I came, I saw, I charged it."

When men reach their sixties and retire, they go to pieces. Women go right on cooking.
 

moreluck

golden ticket member
"Sometimes," complained the presidential aide, "I wish we had a Pope instead of a President. Then we'd only have to kiss his ring."

A women's best protection is a little money of her own.

There was a tailor who took out an ad in the Yellow Pages that read, "I'll cut for you, I'll sew for you, I'll even dye for you."

As I get older and stiffer of knee, I feel that the hardest thing to raise in the garden is me.
 

moreluck

golden ticket member
"I think on-stage nudity is disgusting, shameful, and damaging to all things American. But if I were twenty-two with a great body, it would be artistic, tasteful, patriotic, and a progressive religious experience." ~Shelley Winters~

(Sign around a picture of dandelions) .................. "I Fought the Lawn and the Lawn Won."

Talent wins games, but teamwork wins championships.

"it takes all kinds of people to make up this world--too bad you're not one of them."

A new study from the Centers for Disease Control says that tripping over your pets causes over 86,000 serious injuries each year. Worse...only 30 percent of those make it to YouTube.
 

moreluck

golden ticket member
I love to go to the doctor. Where else would a man look at me and say, "Take off your clothes"? -Phyllis Diller-

“I’m worried about you always being at the bottom of your class,” said the father to his son.
“Don’t worry Dad,” he replied. “They still teach the same thing at both ends.”

"You are living proof that wisdom doesn't come with age."

More and more crews are being made up of women lately. Soon they won't be able to call it the cockpit anymore!
 

moreluck

golden ticket member
MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

You never know a man at all if you've met him only when his wife is around
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"I know what men want. Men want to be really, really close to a woman who will leave them alone." - Elayne Boosler -

Men don't realize that if we're sleeping with them on the first date, we're probably not interested in seeing them again either.

A candle loses nothing if it is used to light another one.
 

moreluck

golden ticket member
You should always carry change with you in case you need to add your two cents' worth.

My wife submits and I obey; she always lets me have her way.
 

moreluck

golden ticket member
Freedom of speech is wonderful – right up there with the freedom not to listen.

Stop comparing yourself to the made-up fantasy images presented by the media; instead, be the best that you can be, given the attributes that you have.

"If I misbehave and nobody sees me, that’s one less lie I’ll have to tell later." (Dave Dunseath)

Be naughty – save Santa the trip.
 

moreluck

golden ticket member
Some people wish to get what they deserve, while others fear the same.

Give a jackass an education and you get a smartass.

Even at a Mensa convention someone is the dumbest person in the room.

Ulcers are caused not so much by what we eat as what's eating us.

One way to stop a runaway horse is to bet on him.

Football is a game in which a handful of men run around for two hours watched by millions of people who could really use the exercise.
 

moreluck

golden ticket member
Life is an open door. It can be closed at any time, so don’t complain about the draft.

You’re driving a car. It isn’t a telephone booth, a beauty parlor or a restaurant.


Worry is like a rocking chair; it keeps you busy, but gets you nowhere.
 

moreluck

golden ticket member
Good Friday Quotes....

It's Good Friday. Good because over 2000 years ago the events of today prove that we matter to God.

Today we remember God's great love for us. May this day bring new meaning and change in your life! Wishing all Christians a blessed Good Friday.

Augustus William Hare ......The cross was two pieces of dead wood; and a helpless, unresisting Man was nailed to it; yet it was mightier than the world, and triumphed, and will ever triumph over it.

John 11:25-26..... Jesus said to her, 'I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in me will never die.'
 

moreluck

golden ticket member
Don't worry that children are never listening to you. Worry that they are always watching you.

"A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education he may steal the whole railroad."

"The more I think of you, the less I think of you."
 

moreluck

golden ticket member
Easter Quotes......


The resurrection gives my life meaning and direction and the opportunity to start over no matter what my circumstances. ~Robert Flatt



Easter says you can put truth in a grave, but it won't stay there. ~Clarence W. Hall



It is the hour to rend thy chains,
The blossom time of souls. ~Katherine Lee Bates



The joyful news that He is risen does not change the contemporary world. Still before us lie work, discipline, sacrifice. But the fact of Easter gives us the spiritual power to do the work, accept the discipline, and make the sacrifice. ~Henry Knox Sherrill





Easter is the demonstration of God that life is essentially spiritual and timeless. ~Charles M. Crowe



Tomb, thou shalt not hold Him longer;
Death is strong, but Life is stronger;
Stronger than the dark, the light;
Stronger than the wrong, the right...
~Phillips Brooks, "An Easter Carol"



Let every man and woman count himself immortal. Let him catch the revelation of Jesus in his resurrection. Let him say not merely, "Christ is risen," but "I shall rise." ~Phillips Brooks
 

moreluck

golden ticket member
Humor is a hole that lets the sawdust out of a stuffed shirt.

There's one good thing about having teenagers in the house. Your bathroom mirror will never be stolen.
 
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