Great IS Quotes

Discussion in 'UPS Information Technology' started by an anonymous guest, Jan 11, 2008.

  1. After 34 years in Corporate IT, I find I have a wealth of humorous, and not so humerous, things that have been said to me, and me. SO let's have some fun (with credit to the 'sup' quotes thread....what is the most memorable thing you have had an IS Manager say to you...

    Here one from the 70s-80s:

    'Its in the queue.'

    Go UPS!
  2. pretzel_man

    pretzel_man Well-Known Member

    Wow! 34 years in IT. You were around when there were only a handful.

    My first visit to IT was a little over 20 years ago, and it was small then.

  3.'s another one...

    $$Hasp001 Hasp Catstrphohic Error

    Go UPS!

    BROWN4LIFE15 Guest

    we get plenty of great quotes in RAMSEY---! and that's all they are 'cause no one ever ever puts anything in writing. it's all talk, and most times, no action.

    I think the last great one was during the last snowstorm: "if you are concerned for your safety, AND YOU HAVE PERSONAL TIME LEFT, you can leave early". HOWEVER, when a co-worker attempted to do so, they were told they couldn't leave cause there would be no one left to support XYZ application.

    another great one in RAMSEY is the 'open door policy' quote: "come by my office whenever you have something you want to get off your chest BUT just make sure it's nothing negative about me or else I will make your life miserable until you either quit (FOR A GREAT OPPORTUNITY OUTSIDE UPS) or I decide you'd be a good fit for a DEAD END job in Morristown".
  5. clipper98

    clipper98 New Member

    When did Morristown become a dead end job ???


    UPSOVERSIZE New Member

    I am in Motown and it is far from dead. Maybe you should come look and see what we do.

    I love Morristown and the people who work there. I have seen many people promoted in and out of Morristown.

    I counted 5 Portfolio Mgrs and 2 board members as people who were promoted out of Morristown. That doesn't sound dead end to me.:happy2:

    My last PM was promoted to a Systems Mgr in Ramsey and before that another PM was promoted to a Systems Mgr in Mahwah.

    I don't think you know what you are talking about :whiteflag:

    And to give you a Quote:



    BROWN4LIFE15 Guest

    dont worry big guy, u are not the problem, as evidenced by all the Morristown folks that are obviously happy working under an App Mgr who cares- dont u think its time for a change in RAMSEY?

    and big guy---this is not who u think it is...I AM IN RAMSEY 5 days a week, not MORRISTOWN.

    and my sincere apologies to the Morristown UPSers that I may have insulted. I am sure all of you make a significant contribution to the success of UPS. (however, I do know a few people that were sent there to rot)

    oh, and one more thing big guy, please stop sending me PRIVATE MESSAGES to meet you in your office...I'm starting to think u might be sweet on me !!

    GO GIANTS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Lasted edited by : Jan 13, 2008
  8. walterCronkite

    walterCronkite New Member

    This roving reporter has noted that these words of the prophet have for years been written on the subway walls and tenement halls and that the response has always been heard in the sounds of silence. Are my readers supposed to believe that Scott David started his career at UPS? That he was promoted to CFO from some pedestrian position at UPS? Echoes the sound of silence.

    And that's the way it is, January 14, 2008
  9. Brown2purple

    Brown2purple Guest

    You are constantly targeting one person and that is sick, because no matter what is going on one person can not take a credit for everything, good or bad. You sound like one biter, lonely, vindictive, obsessed person. I work in Ramsey and things could not have been better here. People are excited, busy, making an impact to the organization and are measured by how much impact they are making. You probably like to portray that you are still in Ramsey, but it's pretty obvious you have been transferred to Motown or Mahwah and you can not let go. And as far as comparing apps managers, you are wrong again. They are very similar in what they have accomplished in their organizations, including personel issues. People talk. They work well together and that is helping all of us to have more opportunities in the entire Portfolio. Go get help to let go. You making me think that you could get 'postal" on the apps manager in Ramsey. Scary !!!
  10. glome&doom

    glome&doom Guest

    Hey Brown4Life,
    Did you notes a smiley face for this thread or you don't care? All you want is to talk about what you want no mater what other people are talking about? Are you ljust ooking for sympathy?
    Go away....
  11. BROWN4LIFE15

    BROWN4LIFE15 Guest

    Brown2purple: I think such a serious accusation would have more credibility if it was coming from a non-anonymous source. You making me think that you could get 'postal" on the apps manager in Ramsey. Scary !!! (note: posted during business hours)

    and for all u know, I could be a former-employee of UPS !

    and by the way, your PHONY id sounds as if u do not work for UPS any longer and have gone to work for the competition

    regardless, it if makes u feel any better I will not post anything for a month, and will attempt to do as u say Go get help to let go.

    glome&doom (another bogus ID) : what is a GLOME anyway, and what does a smiley face mean? (also posted during business hours)

    I will read both your replies but will not reply back because of my self-imposed exile --
  12. Here's another quotes:

    CI: I'm a FAST Programmer.
    FE: I'm a slow accountant.

    Go UPS!
  13. Here's one from the mid 70s...

    If that mainframe was an anchor, it would only sink intermittently.....IBM Engineer

    Go UPS!
  14. Dfigtree

    Dfigtree New Member

    From JXS/DHF coversation during the data center move to migrate the PTS system to the Windward data center.

    DHF (representing the migration team) to JXS: JXS, the team has determined that the most reliable and most economical way to move the PTS system to Windward is to put all the PTS DASD on a UPS Air Cargo plane and fly it down.

    JXS to DHF: I trust the team. Just one thing though. I approve this airplane stuff with one condition. You jump seat on that plane.

    DHF to JXS: Why?

    JXS to DHF: Because if that plane goes down, it will be merciful if you went down with it compared to what I would do to you.
  15. Dfig...

    That was great! And a nice flight was had by all, except if you had to go to the bathroom!

    Go UPS!

    P71 to CFO circa 1979: This is our systems programming group where we do the engineering to keep you old, cheap, unreliable mainframes running.

    CFO to P71: What do you do?

    P71: I am the Dept Manager (newly minted systems manager).

    CFO to P71: Why aren;t you programming?
  16. adelaide_guy

    adelaide_guy New Member

    When I had news that I had to leave now as my mom was terminally ill in the hospital, my project leader came running after me and asked:

    "Please do your WAR and status reports before you leave"

    So I powered the PC on and hurriedly did the above, the people who worked around me were incredelous that I was asked to do this.
  17. IS Creed

    IS Creed Guest

    There is nothing more inefficient than doing efficiently that which should not have been done at all.
  18. upscorpis

    upscorpis New Member

    Generic CIM Person to Generic IT Person: "I'm just a dumb user but..."

    "...if I did this system, that would be configurable."
    "...can't you just update a table or something?"
    "...<insert architecture here>."
    " guys can't tell me how the requirements should be implemented!"
    " shouldn't have done it that way. Oh, that's in the requirements?"
  19. 10thLetter

    10thLetter New Member

    I didn't think "Just flush IT" would be appropriate for the layoff memo...or maybe a little humor would ease the pain?
  20. Monkey Butt

    Monkey Butt You can call me Chappy Staff Member

    Hey..Hey! You talkin' 'bout me?
    That's very hurtful. It wouldn't be as hurtful if it wasn't true:knockedout:.

    Just think of it as an opportunitiy to educate us dumb users.