How to handle this situation?

jeepupser

Well-Known Member
This will be long-winded I am sorry about that. I work at UPS and I have a friend that works with me at UPS. He is, well feminine to put it the least (higher voice, can make feminine hand gestures). We are good friends and we tease each other it is part of the way we get along.

Anyway, yesterday a new sup (who people already don't like) was asking him if we were boyfriends. I have nothing against gay people, and if he is gay I don't care. However, my friend seems to get in trouble a lot and he went to HR who supposedly talked to her about it (I doubt that as it is). She does not know that I know this (but she was all friendly to me today). Then my supervisor wanted me to go work with her (I didn't like her to begin with because she does not know what she is doing and tries to yell at me when I take control, which after being there almost 5 years I know what to do when we get backed up). Since she was not fired (as of today), would you say that I have the right, or at least should have the option to not work with her?
 

PeasAndCarrots

Well-Known Member
I'm confused. So a new pt sup who is female asked if you and your afeminite friend, whom you tease?(wtf?!), were boyfriends? She then gets "talked with" by HR but not fired and you're wondering if we think she should be fired or something? I wouldn't say so, she's new and mistakes happen. If she does something again then maybe you have a case.

Honestly, if that kind of situation was going on at my center, almost everyone would assume y'all were lovers and behind your back jokes would ensue on an almost daily basis. The sup just didn't have the good sense to keep it hush hush.
 

AlwaysChafed

Well-Known Member
The more you let it brush off your shoulders the better off. If you are just starting you have a long way to go because I promise you, there is someone worse, and when she is replaced the replacement could be ten times worse.

The only way to avoid this supervisor is to transfer or quit. Stay strong and don't quit. Smile always.
 

DriveInDriveOut

Inordinately Right
She was asking him if you were boyfriends.... so what? Not sure why she would be fired for this. Not sure why you would think that would be a reason to not have to work with her. Maybe the gay part of this scenario is making this a touchy situation for you for whatever reason.
 

Indecisi0n

Well-Known Member
When Sup comes up to talk to you, Z-snap him and walk away.

z-snap-o.gif
 

UpstateNYUPSer(Ret)

Well-Known Member
You need to file a sexual harassment complaint with HR. If what you say is true the sup was way out of line with her question. Your sexual orientation has no impact on how you do you job and is quite frankly none of her damn business.
 
There's no grounds for sexual harassment if their working conditions haven't changed or were affected at the time of he incident.
The OP has not given the details of how the question was asked. Just as a simple inquiry? Or to humiliate? His friend apparently didn't appreciate how it was asked and went to hr and hey will be in the process of investigating. If it was that serious of a situation she would have been moved immediately.
As far as the OP, if the interaction he is describing with the sup does not make any further mention of the " incident" and is simply the directing of employees in the operation then he needs to do his job as directed.

Hr will speak to him eventually and to her. Unless it's much worse than he described at worst the sup might get her hand slapped for this.
 

Jackburton

Gone Fish'n
Why is it ok for you to tease each other back and forth, yet if the sup asked (possiably in a joking tone, unable to see that in your post) if you two are boyfriends, and you get pissed? What if the sup is offended by your "teasing" back and forth? If you're going to get all personal out in the open back and forth with your "friend" don't get all butt hurt when someone asks what's up with you two, just my .02.
 

steward71

Well-Known Member
I have to agree it is none of the supervisors business if your freind is gay or not. But just some advice before you go running to HR. You stated yourself you and your buddy make jokes to one another. The supervisor must have heard this in order to come to this comment and possible felt it was ok for her to ask this question. So if you continue to go to HR with this complaint she in turn could make the issue that you guys made her fell ok with this since you both joke or she could say your joking around offended her in some way. So be very careful when you open that door to HR because it could come back to bite you. Good Luck.
 

upschuck

Well-Known Member
I have to agree it is none of the supervisors business if your freind is gay or not. But just some advice before you go running to HR. You stated yourself you and your buddy make jokes to one another. The supervisor must have heard this in order to come to this comment and possible felt it was ok for her to ask this question. So if you continue to go to HR with this complaint she in turn could make the issue that you guys made her fell ok with this since you both joke or she could say your joking around offended her in some way. So be very careful when you open that door to HR because it could come back to bite you. Good Luck.

He didn't say they joked about "gay" things.
 

MassWineGuy

Well-Known Member
The OP is a little confusing, but I think I understand. About the work assignment, grin and bear it buddy. That's why it's called "work." About the supe's moronic comment, I think that after some recent events that UPS would be happy to avoid any more negative publicity. File the harrassment complaint. At the very least, it will get that supe in hot water, which is where she belongs.
 

FilingBluesFL

Well-Known Member
I think we need to get to the facts here...

Have you or have you not ever had an "experimental rendezvous" with your "friend?"

Do you frequently find yourself in your "friends" "power zone?"

Are you grasping your "friend" at opposite ends with feet shoulder width apart?

We need details here.
 
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