If you're gonna tell me how to do the job, DON'T retire down here

Discussion in 'UPS Discussions' started by FilingBluesFL, Jun 26, 2014.

  1. FilingBluesFL

    FilingBluesFL Well-Known Member

    So I pull up to a crappy trailer the other day, in an all trailer park neighborhood.

    A wonderful Northerner decides to come out and shirtlessly greet me.


    "Hey, ya know you move 'bout fast as dem guys up in Michigan."

    "What?"

    "If it was me dooeen this route, Idda be done by now!"

    "Oh, I see, well you're welcome to step up to the plate and take care of the rest of this yourself."

    "Man, I'd have this done by 5pm, done by 5! This is so easy, so easy! I'dda be done by now! But now I'm retired, I got these problems with my shoulders and back, but I'd still be done!"


    Ohhhh, I see. A runner gunner, who's now retired and has permanent physical problems, is going to tell ME, that he can do the job faster, and would be done by now... and is also bitching about being somewhat disabled from not working safe.

    Nice job, dude.

    Please, don't retire down here if you're gonna jive me for working safe so I don't end up all messed up and walking bent over at the end.

    Seriously, go elsewhere.

    I didn't think Dave was retired already.....
     
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  2. Brownslave688

    Brownslave688 You want a toe? I can get you a toe.

    Probably a sup
     
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  3. oldngray

    oldngray nowhere special

    Probably a former FedEx driver.
     
  4. Indecisi0n

    Indecisi0n Well-Known Member

    Did he have a good body?
     
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  5. oldngray

    oldngray nowhere special

    What are his socks like?
     
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  6. Jackburton

    Jackburton Gone Fish'n

    Were you there dropping off a Restoration Hardware book he'll be using to furnish his trailer?
     
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  7. Just tell him to have a nice day! and that you are making $48+ hr. Overtime!
     
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  8. Richard Harrow

    Richard Harrow Deplorable.

    Retired from this job and living in a trailer park?

    Yep. This guy can probably offer you some really sound advice.
     
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  9. olroadbeech

    olroadbeech Happy Verified UPSer

    retired people are the most boring. reliving their glory days. im in feeder so I have to listen to retired , obese, truckers telling me I couldn't do the job they did without power steering, engine brakes and everything else.

    im never retiring. i'll retire from here but will continue working somewhere fun part-time.
     
  10. cachsux

    cachsux Wah

    I would never tell you your job but ,no offense ,I won't be moving to FL either.
     
  11. Johney

    Johney Raise your hand if you think Upstate is a D-Bag

    When I retire I'm leaving Fla.
     
  12. Moving next door,to Upstate??
     
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  13. Johney

    Johney Raise your hand if you think Upstate is a D-Bag

    He's gotta have someone help him cross the street.
     
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  14. You two,will make a cute couple (of something)
     
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  15. You should have asked him if you could have his old ups socks.
     
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  16. Johney

    Johney Raise your hand if you think Upstate is a D-Bag

    Better yet I'm going to move to New York and drive slow in the fast lane. Just like they do here.
     
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  17. ZQXC

    ZQXC Guest

    Also, be sure to put your bare feet up on the dash. WTF?
     
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  18. boyo1991

    boyo1991 New Member

    Fedex guys fer sure lol

    Sent using BrownCafe App
     
  19. Operational needs

    Operational needs Well-Known Member

    I asked a guy from NYC why they do that. He said because they're not used to driving on the highway and get scared. Lol.
     
  20. oldngray

    oldngray nowhere special

    Don't they teach people in NY the slowest people should stay in the left lane?