If you're traveling to Boston, you'll need to know.....

Discussion in 'Life After Brown' started by Big Babooba, Mar 25, 2009.

  1. Big Babooba

    Big Babooba Well-Known Member

    Welcome to Bawstin

    Information on Boston and the surrounding area:

    There's no school on School Street, no court on Court Street, no dock on Dock Square, no water on Water Street.
    Back Bay streets are in alphabetical "oddah": Arlington, Berkeley, Clarendon, Dartmouth, etc.

    So are South Boston streets: A, B, C, D, etc.
    If the streets are named after trees (e.g. Walnut, Chestnut, Cedar), you're on Beacon Hill.

    If they're named after poets, you're in Wellesley.

    Massachusetts Ave is Mass Ave; Commonwealth Ave is Comm Ave; South Boston is Southie. The South End is the South
    End. East Boston is Eastie. The North End is east of the former West End. The West End and Scollay Square are no more; a guy
    named Rappaport got rid of them one night. Roxbury is The Burry, Jamaica Plain is J.P.

    How to say these Massachusetts city names correctly: **Say it wrong, be shunned**
    Worcester: Wuhsta (or Wistah)
    Gloucester : Glawsta
    Leicester: Lesta
    Woburn: Wooban
    Dedham : Dedim (like denim w/ a D in the N pace)
    Revere: Re-vee-ah
    Quincy: Quinzee
    Peabody: Peabuddy
    Waltham : Walth-ham
    Chatham: Chattum

    Frappes have ice cream, milkshakes don't.
    If it is fizzy and flavored, it's tonic.
    Soda is CLUB SODA.
    "Pop" is Dad.
    When we want Tonic WATER, we will ask for Tonic WATER.
    The smallest beer is a pint.
    Scrod is whatever they tell you it is, usually fish.
    If you paid more than $6/pound, you got scrod.
    It's not a water fountain; it's a bubblah.
    It's not a trashcan; it's a barrel.
    It's not a spucky it's a sub.
    It's not a shopping cart; it's a carriage.
    It's not a purse; it's a pockabook.
    They're not franks; they're haht dahgs. Franks are money in France.
    Police don't drive patrol units or black and whites they drive a "crooza".
    If you take the bus, your on the "looza crooza".
    It's not a rubber band, it's an elastic.
    It's not a traffic circle, it's a rotary.
    If something's good, it's "pissa". If something's really good, it's "wicked pissa".

    Things not to do:
    Don't pahk your cah in Hahvid Yahd they'll tow it to Meffa (Medford) or Slumaville (Somerville).
    Don't sleep in the Common. (Boston Common)
    Don't wear Orange in Southie on St. Patrick's Day.

    Things you should know:
    There are two State Houses, two City Halls, two courthouses, two Hancock buildings (one old, one new
    for each).
    The colored lights on top the old Hancock tell the weatha':
    "Solid blue, clear view…."
    "Flashing blue, clouds due…."
    "Solid red, rain ahead…."
    "Flashing red, snow instead…." - (except in summer; flashing red means the Red Sox game was rained out)

    Route 128 is also I-95 south. It's also I-93 north.
    The underground train is not a subway. It's the "T", and it doesn't run all night (fah chrysakes, this ain't Noo Yawk).
    Order the "cold tea" in China Town after 2:00 am you'll get a kettle full of beer.

    Bostonians… think that it's their God-given right to cut off someone in traffic.
    Bostonians…think that there are only 25 letters in the alphabet (no R's).
    Bostonians…think that three straight days of 90+ temperatures is a heat wave.
    Bostonians…refer to six inches of snow as a "dusting."
    Bostonians…always "bang a left" as soon as the light turns green, and oncoming traffic always expects it.
    Bostonians…say everything in town is "a five-minute walk." (pronounced "wok")
    Bostonians…believe that using your turn signal is a sign of weakness.
    Bostonians…think that 63-degree ocean water is warm.
    Bostonians…think Rhode Island accents are annoying.
  2. dilligaf

    dilligaf IN VINO VERITAS

    But Big, what about the steamahs and beeyah? You didn't mention those. Oh and that other one your ah always going on about. LOBSTAH!
  3. wrecker

    wrecker Member

    You forgot the "Packie run".
  4. Big Babooba

    Big Babooba Well-Known Member

    Ah yes the "Packie Run", that's a statewide ritual. I didn't know they made them in Rhode Island. By the way, your accent is annoying me!:happy-very: (just Kidding). My next door neighbor is from Rhode Island. He's a Red Sox fan so I tolerate him. If he was a Wankee fan, I'd have to get a couple of Pit Bulls.
  5. dilligaf

    dilligaf IN VINO VERITAS

    WTH is a 'packie run'? LOL
  6. over9five

    over9five Senior Member Staff Member

    Package store trip (Go get your beeyah)
  7. wrecker

    wrecker Member

    I grew up in Uxbridge. Recently moved to RI.

    My accent is all Mass.

    I was stationed in TX when I was in the army. Everyone there made fun of my Boston accent. When I came home on leave, my friends made fun of the southern accent I picked up. Ya'll wanna get some beeyahs? Got rid of that shortly after getting out.
  8. Sammie

    Sammie Well-Known Member

    While we're on the subject of Easterners, I was in customer service at UPS, where I often called all over the U.S. in search of lost packages or to reroute shipments, etc.

    True Story

    I was talking to a supervisor in a New York City center one day who
    was helping me locate a package. It was summertime and he had just returned from a vacation he had taken way "Out West". Here I was thinking Missouri, Nebraska, Kansas, maybe Wyoming...

    The guy told me that the drive Out West really took him out of his comfort zone what with all the open spaces and boring scenery for
    miles on end. The trip was exhausting and he would never travel that
    far away from home again since New York City had everything he needed.

    Curious as to where his travels led him, I asked where he went.
    His reply - "New Jersey."