MrFedEx
Engorged Member
Dear Fred,
Thanks for another wonderful year at FedEx. If you'd like, I'd bow down and kiss your ring for being so damn good to us. For my 60 hours this week, I got donuts, a worthless "gift", and a bunch of cheap crap cookies and tangerines to show me how much management cared. In the meantime, I got to see my wife and kids for about 30 minutes each day because I had to go crash and be back at your place by 0430 for more fun.
I really appreciate all of your efforts to make me more productive. Gap time reports, extra stops per hour, and all of the rest really showed me how much you care. Your utter concern for my safety and break times really meant a lot. Whenever I went out 25 stops over my 195, I could always do everything safely and also get a full break.
Praise Jesus for all of those politicians who accepted your generous contributions in exchange for killing the RLA revisions to the FAA Reauthorization Bill. It would have been awful to be paid an actual living wage and also get our retirement plan back. I know you reinvested it in the company because you care so much about our future and our eventual retirement from this great company.
In fact, praise God for you Fred, because you're the shining star atop my tree and our guiding light in the sky. Please take all that money you made this year through screwing us and use it for a good cause, like buying another professional sports franchise or sponsoring another NASCAR team. Or maybe you can buy a small country and have all of them worship you for the great man you are.
As we celebrate the life of an extraordinary man who was born 2010 years ago, you should be ashamed of yourself for being the exact opposite of what He stood for.
Merry Christmas, Fred.
Thanks for another wonderful year at FedEx. If you'd like, I'd bow down and kiss your ring for being so damn good to us. For my 60 hours this week, I got donuts, a worthless "gift", and a bunch of cheap crap cookies and tangerines to show me how much management cared. In the meantime, I got to see my wife and kids for about 30 minutes each day because I had to go crash and be back at your place by 0430 for more fun.
I really appreciate all of your efforts to make me more productive. Gap time reports, extra stops per hour, and all of the rest really showed me how much you care. Your utter concern for my safety and break times really meant a lot. Whenever I went out 25 stops over my 195, I could always do everything safely and also get a full break.
Praise Jesus for all of those politicians who accepted your generous contributions in exchange for killing the RLA revisions to the FAA Reauthorization Bill. It would have been awful to be paid an actual living wage and also get our retirement plan back. I know you reinvested it in the company because you care so much about our future and our eventual retirement from this great company.
In fact, praise God for you Fred, because you're the shining star atop my tree and our guiding light in the sky. Please take all that money you made this year through screwing us and use it for a good cause, like buying another professional sports franchise or sponsoring another NASCAR team. Or maybe you can buy a small country and have all of them worship you for the great man you are.
As we celebrate the life of an extraordinary man who was born 2010 years ago, you should be ashamed of yourself for being the exact opposite of what He stood for.
Merry Christmas, Fred.