My Thanksgiving Day Survival Guide

Big Babooba

Well-Known Member
Happy Thanksgiving to all of you, but remember for your own safety:

  1. Take human bites.
  2. Ask for the food item that you desire be passed to you rather than reach across the table for it.
  3. If you don't heed #1 or #2 above - COUNT YOUR FINGERS!
  4. Don't fart at the table.
 

UpstateNYUPSer(Ret)

Well-Known Member
Happy Thanksgiving to all of you, but remember for your own safety:

  1. Take human bites.
  2. Ask for the food item that you desire be passed to you rather than reach across the table for it.
  3. If you don't heed #1 or #2 above - COUNT YOUR FINGERS!
  4. Don't fart at the table.
  5. Do not seat your lesbian cousin next to your homophobic grandfather.
  6. Do not seat a draft dodger next to a war vet (All in the Family reference).
  7. Keep track of how many glasses of wine your aunt drinks as we all know the more she drinks the looser the lips get.
  8. Don't talk politics or sports.
We should all set aside whatever differences we may have with one another as we come together to celebrate this festival of thanksgiving. Thanksgiving is about family. I will be spending mine with my son. Happy Thanksgiving to all of you. Dave.
 

Big Babooba

Well-Known Member
Happy Thanksgiving to all of you, but remember for your own safety:

  1. Take human bites.
  2. Ask for the food item that you desire be passed to you rather than reach across the table for it.
  3. If you don't heed #1 or #2 above - COUNT YOUR FINGERS!
  4. Don't fart at the table.
  5. Do not seat a draft dodger next to a war vet (All in the Family reference).
  6. Keep track of how many glasses of wine your aunt drinks as we all know the more she drinks the looser the
  7. Do not seat your lesbian cousin next to your homophobic grandfather.
  8. lips get.
  9. Don't talk politics or sports.
We should all set aside whatever differences we may have with one another as we come together to celebrate this festival of thanksgiving. Thanksgiving is about family. I will be spending mine with my son. Happy Thanksgiving to all of you. Dave.
Nice additions Dave, but Thanksgiving with no fireworks? Have you gone mad?:happy-very:
 

ajblakejr

Age quod agis
Happy Thanksgiving to all of you, but remember for your own safety:

  1. Take human bites.
  2. Ask for the food item that you desire be passed to you rather than reach across the table for it.
  3. If you don't heed #1 or #2 above - COUNT YOUR FINGERS!
  4. Don't fart at the table.
  5. Do not seat your lesbian cousin next to your homophobic grandfather.
  6. Do not seat a draft dodger next to a war vet (All in the Family reference).
  7. Keep track of how many glasses of wine your aunt drinks as we all know the more she drinks the looser the lips get.
  8. Don't talk politics or sports.
  9. Take a minute or two and sit down at the kiddie table and talk, avoid preaching and really listen.
 

Catatonic

Nine Lives
I actually prefer the kiddie table. There are no pretenses there.
Funny ... my wife commented I spend more time with the kids today than with the adults and that I am a "baby hog". We had 3 babies less than 6 months old and I like babies and they like me. Did not get thrown up on today, which is a first.
 
D

Dis-organized Labor

Guest
Happy Thanksgiving to all of you, but remember for your own safety:

  1. Take human bites.
  2. Ask for the food item that you desire be passed to you rather than reach across the table for it.
  3. If you don't heed #1 or #2 above - COUNT YOUR FINGERS!
  4. Don't fart at the table.
  5. Do not seat your lesbian cousin next to your homophobic grandfather.
  6. Do not seat a draft dodger next to a war vet (All in the Family reference).
  7. Keep track of how many glasses of wine your aunt drinks as we all know the more she drinks the looser the lips get.
  8. Don't talk politics or sports.
  9. Take a minute or two and sit down at the kiddie table and talk, avoid preaching and really listen.
  10. Wait until you leave to start criticizing the relatives you only see once a year.
  11. Leave the fan running if your "Bio clock" kicks in at Aunt Patty's house.
  12. When you wife reads the annual family prayer, act as if she really nailed it!
  13. Don't bring up the SWAT visit to your Brother-in-Laws house last month to his parents!!!
  14. Never discuss Religion,unions,ford vs chevy, OJ Simpson,Obama,Iraq,PC vs mac,who died lately,porn,music,movies,or how youv'e decided today is the day I come out of the closet
 
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PT Stewie

"Big Fella"
Make sure the non-Irish in the family bring the ravioli coupled together with the trypotophan from the turkey and the medicine tasting twany port they should provide a well needed nap during the Dallas game . You may even sleep through you daughters invitation to go shopping at midnight for some God forsaken bargains.
 

BSWALKS

Fugitive From Reality
no that was another episode !
Cove, did you close up your camp? Im going to Maine Thursday.
My wife opened the house up in April, & she went up a couple times.

I haven't been able to go since I winterized it in October of last year. Really looking forward to it.
Thanksgiving in vacationland, gonna be real nice.
 
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