Politics, Religion, Morals and Work Ethic.

[stevetheupsguy]

How many of us parents are teaching our children our perception of these things? How many of us with grown children have taught them about these things and watched them carry them to adulthood? How many have watched our children go in a totally different direction than what you as parents expected/intended? How many of us have carried the legacy taught to you by your parents? How many of us have just gone our own way using bits and pieces of what we've learned over the years?

I was raised by two totally different families. One family was conservative, Christian, worked for a living, middle class, while the other was liberal, Catholic, on welfare and poor. I was raised by each for about the same amount of years. The first family was my foster family and the second, biological. I think I turned out more like the first family, though I don't know if it's because I was younger and more impressionable or because I made up my own mind later in life.

How did you and yours turn out? Remember, there are no right or wrongs here. I'm just curious to see if what we're teaching our children is sticking, and if what was taught to us stuck, as well.

 

[fethrs]

Steve does this count if I dont have kids? I think I turned out fine, my dad was mean and my mom was cool.

 

[Babagounj]

four concepts that don't mix well together

 

[Raw]

How many of us parents are teaching our children our perception of these things? How many of us with grown children have taught them about these things and watched them carry them to adulthood? How many have watched our children go in a totally different direction than what you as parents expected/intended? How many of us have carried the legacy taught to you by your parents? How many of us have just gone our own way using bits and pieces of what we've learned over the years?

I was raised by two totally different families. One family was conservative, Christian, worked for a living, middle class, while the other was liberal, Catholic, on welfare and poor. I was raised by each for about the same amount of years. The first family was my foster family and the second, biological. I think I turned out more like the first family, though I don't know if it's because I was younger and more impressionable or because I made up my own mind later in life.
I was raised by a pack of wolves and my kids turned out fine except that my son tends to mark his territory unappropriatley!

 

[stevetheupsguy]

Steve does this count if I dont have kids? I think I turned out fine, my dad was mean and my mom was cool.

Yeah it counts. It's about us and our kids. I see a lot of your Mom in you.

four concepts that don't mix well together

Evereyone has some sort of mix of all of the above. right, left, conservative, liberal, etc...

I was raised by a pack of wolves and my kids turned out fine except that my son tends to mark his territory unappropriatley!

LOL, your son is City Driver?

 

[dannyboy]

Steve

Interesting mix.

Ive dealt with quite a few foster kids over the years, some for a long time, some not so long. Others I got while they were young, some in their late teens.

While there are exceptions, I found that if you can help a child overcome the issues that placed it into foster care early in life, that child will pretty much stay true to what you have taught it. Not perfect, but good enough. Ive also seen it in those in their teenage years where they have been raised in a total lack of understanding or commitment to right or wrong. Kids of all ages benefit from boundaries when it comes to right and wrong.

The most screwed up kids are those that were allowed to do what they felt was right or wrong, with no adult influence to the contrary.

Politics not so much, two are tied together, and the third comes from the two that are tied together.

d

 

[dilligaf]

Danny,
Thank you. When I first read this I figured it would be another thread that I wasn't interested in. Nothing personal Steve, there just wasn't anything in your original post that caused me to stop and think. However, what you said, Danny, did.

I was fostered as well. Don't talk about it much. It was the best thing that could have happened for me. I agree with you Danny, in that the benefits of boundries help all kids of all ages. I didn't go ino the system until I was about 10/11. Don't really recall and don't want to. All I know is that if I hadn't had a strong definition of what was right and wrong in my foster/adopted family I would not be where I am at now. Of this I have no doubt.

 

[NHDRVR]

How many of us parents are teaching our children our perception of these things? How many of us with grown children have taught them about these things and watched them carry them to adulthood? How many have watched our children go in a totally different direction than what you as parents expected/intended? How many of us have carried the legacy taught to you by your parents? How many of us have just gone our own way using bits and pieces of what we've learned over the years?

I was raised by two totally different families. One family was conservative, Christian, worked for a living, middle class, while the other was liberal, Catholic, on welfare and poor. I was raised by each for about the same amount of years. The first family was my foster family and the second, biological. I think I turned out more like the first family, though I don't know if it's because I was younger and more impressionable or because I made up my own mind later in life.

How did you and yours turn out? Remember, there are no right or wrongs here. I'm just curious to see if what we're teaching our children is sticking, and if what was taught to us stuck, as well.

Wow, this is a bit off the beaten path but we are doing the best job we can with our daughters (7-5). I am doing a different job than my dad did (thankfully) and they seem to be on the right path. I assume those with kids in their teens and older are laughing at that.

I handle my family in the exact opposite manner that I handle my job. My family is close, attached, and always on my mind.

My job is just a damned job...

"How many of us have just gone our own way using bits and pieces of what we've learned over the years?"-- That is the running theme for most of us, in my opinion...

 

[cachsux]

Politics:
I was raised in a liberal middle class family that tended to vote one party. I am open minded but will instantly be turned off by those who bring too much religion into their campaign as I am a big believer in the separation of church and state.

My wife was raised in a military family made up of immigrants to the USA. Portuguese on her fathers side,Irish on her mothers, she views things as whats best for the country irregardless of party but will flip at the first mention of altering the constitution.

Winner:Wife- Our oldest is very similar but does carry some of my skepticism toward politics.

Religion:
Both raised Catholic but open minded. We have or beliefs but also feel we should not push those beliefs on others outside the family.

Our kids have pretty much followed in line so I guess thats a draw.

Morals:
My wife is the better of the two of us and is one of if not the kindest people I know and both my oldest take after her to a fault.

Work Ethic:
No comparison, my wife wins this one. Absolute workaholic,early in our relationship it was the building of her business now its juggling the raising of three children,one with a disability and our marriage and her business and our home. Her idea of relaxation is to work on the house. I have no idea when she sleeps and am seriously considering having her tested for performance enhancing drugs,jk.

This has rubbed off on our oldest as she is the "go to" kid in the neighborhood for babysitting,dogs walking,lawn mowing,etc.

Despite our best efforts to mess things up our kids are turning out better than we could imagine so I guess that all we can ask for.

 

[Overpaid Union Thug]

My wife and I are trying hard to raise our kids to have a good mix of all four (politics, religion, morals, and work ethic) And yes, they do go together. In fact....a religious person, or in this case, family, tend to draw morals from religion but religion is not the only way to get them. Anyone who says that these four things don't mix are sadly mistaken. Politics and religion only clash because of those that think that only their version of religion should be the model from which ideas should be pulled ruin things for the rest of us. And also the people that think that there should be a separation of church and state, which is NOT in The Constitution, tend to wreck the mix as well. Take those two groups of people out of the equation and things work out just fine.

With that said....I am seeing that many young kids and the younger members of the work force are coming out on their own with little to none of these four things. No respect for the law, laziness, no true belief in a higher power, and a one sided indoctrination to one side of the political spectrum in our schools (Kindergarden through college) has ruined the 30 and under members of society. I don't think that it is absolutely necessary that kids are taught politics, religion, morals, and work ethic to become good members of society but those that are tend to have a leg up on those that don't.

 

[Solidarity413]

I'm young enough to be some of your guys' son, so I guess I can't talk quite yet. My mom and my dad are both really really stubborn and hard headed. Thankfully I didn't pick that trait up.

 

[cachsux]

Big, I`m going to have to cut and paste your statement about politics into my post as you did a better job than I did in putting it into words.

 

[UpstateNYUPSer(Ret)]

I'm young enough to be some of your guys' son, so I guess I can't talk quite yet. My mom and my dad are both really really stubborn and hard headed. Thankfully I didn't pick that trait up.

Children should be seen and not heard.

 

[Solidarity413]

Children should be seen and not heard.

Oh Upstate!

 

[stevetheupsguy]

Danny,
Thank you. When I first read this I figured it would be another thread that I wasn't interested in. Nothing personal Steve, there just wasn't anything in your original post that caused me to stop and think. However, what you said, Danny, did.

I was fostered as well. Don't talk about it much. It was the best thing that could have happened for me. I agree with you Danny, in that the benefits of boundries help all kids of all ages. I didn't go ino the system until I was about 10/11. Don't really recall and don't want to. All I know is that if I hadn't had a strong definition of what was right and wrong in my foster/adopted family I would not be where I am at now. Of this I have no doubt.

Did your foster family eventually adopt you?

As far as my children are concerned, I only have one that's old enough to vote. Her mother and I have been divorced since she was 6 years old, so mom has played a big part in the structure of the above ideals. Mom is liberal, I believe Democrat, but not sure. Catholic on the holidays. Works hard but only because no one will support her, IMHO. Not very sound morally, ( experienced while married, though maybe she's changed).

In her first Presidential election my daughter voted for Obama. She claims to be a Born again Christian. She is a very hard worker, which surprised me because she loves to hang out with her friends. As far as morals are concerned she knows what good morals are but doesn't always follow along that line. She's overstepped the boundary line, JMHO. She's due to give birth Aug. 14th, and this was totally unplanned and IMHO, poor timing. Though the two of them "plan" on being "good" parents and staying together, one can only pray for this family. That's as nice as I want to be, on that subject.

I have a 13 year old with another woman (not my current wife). This woman and I never married, though we did live together for a spell. Maybe my overstepping of this boundary is where my eldest got it from. Anyways, this woman is conservative Republican, Catholic, morally "sound" and has a strong work ethic. My daughter is with her more than me Florida visitation schedule), though I do see some of me in her. Only time will tell.

My current wife is a vote by my feeling (closer to Republican) person. She liked McCain/Palin last election. Raised Catholic though she attends a Evangelical Christian church now. I think she was taught the "basic" morals, but her parents left it up to her to figure out the rest. Very strong work ethic to the point of needing workaholics anonymous, LOL Our children are currently 8, 7 and 6 years old and are still trying to figure us out.

Is this all there really is? I mean, is there any proven method to raising a great child to be a great adult? I sort of feel like you do the best you can and throw yours hands up in the air, while you wait and watch what they become.

 

[MD Dan]

Politics, Religion, Morals and Work Ethic

It doesn't make any difference what your politics or religion are. It is Morals and Work Ethic that will make you and your children successful and happy.

 

[stevetheupsguy]

Politics, Religion, Morals and Work Ethic

It doesn't make any difference what your politics or religion are. It is Morals and Work Ethic that will make you and your children successful and happy.

But where does that moral and work ethic come from. There has to be some sort of solid foundation so that it doesn't all cave in on you, right?

 

[Catatonic]

Children should be seen and not heard.

That explains some of my issues.
I thought it was,
"Children should be obscene and absurd."

 

[brownmonster]

I kinda go by the do the best you know how and see what happens philosophy. I see people in my neighborhood that would win parent of the year yet their kids fall into traps and make mistakes. Just like kids who come from bad situations and excel. I try to treat my kids as humans and not try to control every move they make. They make mistakes and will learn from them. We hopefully instill morals and the kids have a forced work ethic so far. (No job, no gas) I'll leave them to make up their own minds on religion and politics.

 

[stevetheupsguy]

That explains some of my issues.
I thought it was,
"Children should be obscene and absurd."

If you go to the local mall and people watch, I'm sure you'll see plenty of those type of children.