Things You Will Never Hear Said at UPS....

[Mike Hawk]

Fragile, Adjective, Italian for "some assembly required". Straight from Webster’s I swear!

 

[Bad Gas!]

Things you won't here at UPS:


1. I understand if you don't make 9.5 because your heavy today...LOL
2. We are going by senoirity in giving days off today...LOL
3. We will send you some help with your over 70's when you call us....LOL
4. We have reviewed the time allowances on your route....and you gained an hour.It was our mistake ..sorry..
5. Be careful in that thunderstorm/tornado today...
6. The mgt team will stop screwing up your route with add/cuts five min.s before you leave building..
7. We are sorry you were missing pkgs today and lost time looking for these pkgs.Therefore we will code extra time allowance for each missing stop you had.
8. The DM wishes to apologize to each driver in the center because he knows in his(her) heart(if he had one) that probably 3 out 5 days a week the drivers are getting shafted.Furthermore, he wishes to apologize to the mgt team for being arogant and disrespectful to them..
9. Have an unsafe day..Drive like heck!...LOL

 

[Dirty Savage]

"Go ahead, punch rude customers."

Oh sweet baby Jesus I wish!

 

[DS]

You have the sniffles? ok stay home and get some rest.
Weve reached our peak,relax there is no more need for improvement
Do you mind if I dont ride with you today and just say I did?
You were way too efficient yesterday,slow down
If you need help,just call...oh hang on I have heard that one
We had such a great peak,we are giving everyone $5,000 just to show how much we appreciate your efforts
I like this thread

 

[Pkgrunner]

We never give extra stops to the fastest workers.

When you get done early, We won't ask you to to help out.

Your preloader called in sick and your load is jacked---you want to take the day off?

 

[dilligaf]

I always thought that " fragile " was German for dropkick.

Gee, I guess we have a few germans working at our center!!!!!!

Now I understand.

 

[deathracer]

i actually hear a thank you from one of the sups, not mine but he's a cool guy im guessing new to supervising but i heard he's been with the company for a few years. i have also heard "well send you help if you get backed up" never happens unless they complain im stopping the belt too much.
i have never heard "thanks for calling in sick we appreciate it comeback when you are ready" i usually get a feeling like if they are gonna nail me to a cross the next day, or they make it sound like i stabbed them in the back. i mean do they seriously want me to go in sick and get 10 more ppl sick, not to mention the customers that can also get sick if i end up sneezing or coughing on their packages.

 

[dilligaf]

you can drive this rte and your jumper will be the regular driver

we gave you 160 stops today but you can have your jumper all day long

I personally made sure that your loader loaded in perfect sequence, you don't have to sort anything today

 

[Pkgrunner]

Don't worry about reciting the DOK or turning in sales leads anymore.

 

[dilligaf]

The company has decided that Keter is a farce and will no longer be using them.

 

[Pkgrunner]

IT was my fault, I'll take the blame.

 

[Pkgrunner]

Parts in stock, will fix asap

 

[MonavieLeaker]

We'll give you an 8 hour dispatch today

 

[rod]

Do you need a hug?

no- but a kiss would be nice when a person is getting ------

 

[dilligaf]

I know you want to see your kids game. Stop on rte, take all the time you need, its ok.

 

[dilligaf]

We will send some one over right away to get that miss-load from you. We definately don't want you to go out of your way.

 

[BigBrownSanta]

Cookout at 5 today. Bring back anything you can't get delivered. Don't be late.

 

[BigBrownSanta]

Or another variation...

Dispatch screwed up today.

If you have more than 8 hours work, bring it back.

We'll get it right tomorrow.

 

[dilligaf]

ok that is really good BBS

 

[Sac Hub Sorter]

I always thought that " fragile " was German for dropkick.

i thought it was french =)