Tv Interview

Discussion in 'UPS Discussions' started by AmYisroelChai, Aug 13, 2007.

  1. AmYisroelChai

    AmYisroelChai New Member

    Tonight on the Larry King show, Larry will interview two UPS employees. Here’s an excerpt from tonight’s show.

    Larry: Dave, you are responsible for one of the largest computer systems in the world. I imagine you started at the bottom of data processing and worked your way up.

    Dave: Absolutely not. I have no computer education. Working your way up at UPS is kind of like that original Star Trek episode where Spock and Kirk wind up in an evil parallel universe and the only way to get ahead and make untold millions is to gang up on your superiors. Therefore, although I may be unworthy I am filthy rich.

    Larry. Do you work hard, Dave?

    Dave (laughing). No, Larry. That was never in my game plan.

    Larry. (smiling) Heh, heh, heh. And, you, Miss UPS Driver, how hard do you work? And by the way, may I say that all UPS drivers should wear shorts? How hard do you work?

    Miss UPS driver. I can’t really tell you. On the one hand I want to work as many hours as possible to feed my children and save for their education. On the other hand if I don’t pick up and deliver all my packages in an unreasonable amount of time, I can get fired. If I work slowly, I book more hours. If I do not work fast enough, I am fired. The managers require that I work faster than humanly possible despite the weather conditions, road conditions or my deteriorating health. I work HARD. I mean really HARD.

    Larry. So you must make more then Dave who doesn’t hardly work at all.

    Miss UPS driver. No, Larry. He makes millions. I make about $70,000 a year give or take.

    Larry. Dave, does that sound fair to you?

    Dave. That’s how big business works in America. The harder you work, the less you make. Some of UPS’ fired managers are now slinging hamburgers at the Mickey D’s. They get yelled by their bosses and by unhappy patrons, are frequently accused of short changing or spitting on the grill, all for less than ten dollars an hour. They could have stayed at UPS if they only would have stopped caring about the employees in favor of the shareholders.

    Larry. Time to pay the bills. We will be back after this message.

    Dave (in the background) We try to stay ahead of the curve. Go where the puck will be not where it is. Our mind’s eye is as far as out future. Er, that’s not right. Best prices. Lowest rates. We’re a partnership. Er, We used to be a partnership. Fastest shi* in the shi**ing business. Number 88. No number 44. Infrastructure. Yeh, that’s it. Right--sizing. Demotions. Distrust. …. I should have taken my disability retirement. I feel so tired.

    Miss UPS driver. Join the club

    Commercial Break.
  2. DorkHead

    DorkHead Active Member

    Is this supposed to be funny??? Everyone knows Larry`s questions are lame.
  3. toeknee2gx

    toeknee2gx New Member

    oh poor ms. ups driver... only making 70k a year.... twice the national average for a WHOLE family's income combined..i feel so bad for her....
  4. brownhornet07

    brownhornet07 New Member

    Also heard the following was going to be asked..

    Larry: Miss UPS Driver, how important is the truck in what you do?

    Miss UPS driver: Um, Larry, without the truck we can't deliver packages

    Larry: Ok, so how important are the packages?...

  5. JustTired

    JustTired free at last.......

    OK....I might as well get in on this.......

    Larry: So Dave, your company was founded by Jim Casey....did you ever meet him?

    Dave: Who?
  6. local804

    local804 Well-Known Member

    35k will get you a cardboard box in NY here, hey.... but its waterfront.
  7. Pollocknbrown

    Pollocknbrown Member

    simple solution for that, dont live in a city that costs 2x to live in as say buffalo. 35K in buffalo actually gets u pretty far.
  8. local804

    local804 Well-Known Member

    I actually have a friend that lives in Buffalo NY. I spent a few weekends up there during football seasons. NO THANKS!
  9. Pollocknbrown

    Pollocknbrown Member

    whats wrong with buffalo? the winter? id rather be able to warm up in a pkg car with a heater than not be able to cool off in a pkg car that has no AC. because i know you'll agree NYC is alot hotter than buffalo.
  10. toeknee2gx

    toeknee2gx New Member

    as tough as the job may be (especially @ ups), unless its just a :censored2:ty job, i really cant feel sorry for anyone making 70k a year....not one bit...70k goes a long way if you know what youre doing with it....
  11. SmithBarney

    SmithBarney Well-Known Member

    45K goes along way if you know what your doing with it....
  12. 705red

    705red Browncafe Steward

    Toe what do you do at ups? Its pretty obvious that you dont drive, wait until the day you do, and lets see if this will be your response!
  13. longlunchguy

    longlunchguy Runnin on Empty

    Why Larry? Cant we get on Letterman? Then Ms. UPS Driver could toss pencils at the computer guy!!!:wink: And you guys should all come live in Fla. Yeah its hot but the green fees are real cheap in the summer.
  14. sendagain

    sendagain Member

    So, did the company sanction these two wizards or did they just kidnap them as they walked out of a hub?
  15. toonertoo

    toonertoo Most Awesome Dog Staff Member

    I think they searched long and hard for those two:lol:
    But Larry has the time to do that.:wink:
  16. Man.. clueless Dave Barnes can't get a break.

    He's got his crack staff of overpaid half wits in the beautiful pink palace working hard in the cafeteria sitting on the phones day after day waiting for HP and IBM, and SUN, and Oracle, and many other vendors to call back tell them what to do to get their computers back up and running, while the business is down and customers and dollars are flying out the windows.

    Meanwhile real IT people at real companies get the jobs done themselves.

    Of course when you have an organization like Dave has fostered that beats down anyone with an original technology idea using a 2x6 board, you tend to get nothing but brainless button pushers.