Why The High Divorce Rate?

[anonymous6]

another driver came into the break room recently and announced he was getting divorced. so we sat around and figured out that almost every feeder driver is working on their 2nd or 3rd marriage. way above the national average of about 52%.

I don't understand. is it our fast food mentality that young people want everything right now? I have been married for almost 30 years and it hasn't all been a walk in the park. lots of ups and downs. while the kids were growing up was the hardest. since they have grown and had kids of their own, it has been mainly sweet.

so what gives? what are your thoughts? is it that most women ( or men to be fair ) want their cake and eat it too? UPS drivers make good money and a lot of our guys are now paying for two families. that is probably why they can't retire.

the really sad thing is that the children are the biggest losers. I tell the younger guys my story and encourage them to somehow work it out for the kids' sake if possible. it's a real shame.

 

[Brownslave688]

I have no clue. It's pretty amazing though. My wife has been going to school 2 hours away from me for the last 2+ years. Out of her class of 25 I think 5-7 of them have gotten divorced in that short time frame. Between her school (high divorce rate) and me being at ups we joke that we are the miracle couple.

Out of the 60 or so drivers in my center I bet there aren't 10 of us on our first marriage still. Most of those are under 10 years. Married.

 

[Integrity]

another driver came into the break room recently and announced he was getting divorced. so we sat around and figured out that almost every feeder driver is working on their 2nd or 3rd marriage. way above the national average of about 52%.

I don't understand. is it our fast food mentality that young people want everything right now? I have been married for almost 30 years and it hasn't all been a walk in the park. lots of ups and downs. while the kids were growing up was the hardest. since they have grown and had kids of their own, it has been mainly sweet.oragputeh,

so what gives? what are your thoughts? is it that most women ( or men to be fair ) want their cake and eat it too? UPS drivers make good money and a lot of our guys are now paying for two families. that is probably why they can't retire.

the really sad thing is that the children are the biggest losers. I tell the younger guys my story and encourage them to somehow work it out for the kids' sake if possible. it's a real shame.

oragputeh,

What gives is that real men don't divorce their wives no matter how hard it gets.

My thouhts about this are that if theses statistics are true then there are not a lot of real men working in your feeder dept or all of UPS from what I see.

I say this very cautiously.

By all means if this doesn't apply to you please don't take offense. I am painting with a very broad brush so do not be offended.

It is very sad when a woman abandons her vow and divorces her husband and leaves.

However if the shoe fits by all means wear it. The replies will show where most stand in this area.

Peace.


Sincerely,
I

 

[jibbs]

oragputeh,

What gives is that real men don't divorce their wives no matter how hard it gets.

My thouhts about this are that if theses statistics are true then there are not a lot of real men working in your feeder dept or all of UPS from what I see.

I say this very cautiously.

By all means if this doesn't apply to you please don't take offense. I am painting with a very broad brush so do not be offended.

It is very sad when a woman abandons her vow and divorces her husband and leaves.

What if the wife wants a divorce? Would a real man force the woman he loves to live in her own personal purgatory? A real man does whatever a situation necessitates in order to achieve the desired result. Morality plays more into the role of humanity than it does in manhood. Sometimes what a man or woman need to do in order to move forward is to realize they've made a mistake and find a solution. The type of solution does not define or disprove a "real man," only whether he can find and enact a viable solution or not.



More on the subject, I think my generation views marriage lightly. Marriage is hard to consider final when more than 1 out of every 2 marriages in this country end in divorce. "'Til death do us part" holds little weight with people my age.... I'm fairly confident they just view that sentiment more as meaningless words recited out of tradition than anything truly purposeful.

 

[Rico]

2/3rds of divorces are instigated by women. http://www.unc.edu/courses/2006fall/econ/586/001/Readings/Brinig.pdf

 

[sortaisle]

The problem lies within our current society. 3 generations ago, divorce was only seen in cases of severe abuse and incest. But 3 generations ago, people NEEDED each other to survive. My parents generation is going to be the last of the majority of couples having lasting marriages. I'm already divorced once and I'm in no hurry to get married or even get involved in a relationship again. From my own experiences and the countless other people I see, it seems a waste of time and resources. And as I'm not the kind of guy to bounce from woman to woman (I oddly enough still firmly believe the institution of marriage is best for families) I don't see the benefit for me, my kids, or the potential gal to get in deep like that again. Also, it seems that we've built a society of people that seem to need someone else to be complete. That's the largest crock of crap in history and it causes people to be codependent. No one can expect someone else to make them happy. Only when someone is happy themselves can they influence someone else' happiness. It's really quite disturbing that the majority of young people don't know how to be content with themselves. Plus like the OP mentioned, it's an instant gratification kind of generation and deep meaningful relationships require time. I don't know how or even if we're ever going to come out of this. In two or three generations, the amount of shallow people in the US is going to be mind numbing.

 

[over9five]

Coming up on 27 years.

Unfortunately, the days of people honoring a vow are over. Hell, the days of honor are long gone. Fewer and fewer of us have it, I'm not sure why that is.... But it's not a good thing.

 

[texan]

Coming up on 27 years.

Unfortunately, the days of people honoring a vow are over. Hell, the days of honor are long gone. Fewer and fewer of us have it, I'm not sure why that is.... But it's not a good thing.

I agree 100 per cent.

A LOT of the "forgotten generation", WWII parents and grandparents, that influenced
the early baby boomers, the mid and cusp baby boomers, 1946-1964.....

They held to values passed down. No!!! Not at all perfect, but much better than now in many areas.

Since 1960 to now, we have been bombarded with drugs, free sex, rebellion, and unruliness.

The last of the moral / value people of WWII, and their eras, are going away.

Now we have Miley Cyrus, and her open lascivious display, being called normal, or OK.

Call me a prude. But what if that was your oldest daughter?

You are ok with that?

Your soul is dead if it is so.

Sigh....

 

[rkctkc]

I just got divorced earlier this year. The wife said I wasn't home enough to give her the attention she needed. She cheated on me with another guy.

 

[oldngray]

UPS employees working such long hours is something many women just can't handle. They want their husband home with them. UPS doesn't care if people have a home life or not.

 

[sortaisle]

I'm not entirely sure the concept of being content exists much anymore. No one is taught sacrifice anymore. The idea of compromise is anathema and is looked down upon. Too many good men and women are left because the other half doesn't know how to make themselves happy and content. And the people who pay the largest price are the kids. No matter how hard I try, no matter how amazing of I dad I try to be, no matter how much quality time I spend with my kids...I'll never match up to what a solid 2 parent family can provide the kids. I guess at least I can take solace in the fact that we don't fight over the kids and each of us sees them every day. A lot of people wind up using the kids as a weapon when things go wrong...sad.

 

[kingOFchester]

oragputeh,

What gives is that real men don't divorce their wives no matter how hard it gets.

My thouhts about this are that if theses statistics are true then there are not a lot of real men working in your feeder dept or all of UPS from what I see.

I say this very cautiously.

By all means if this doesn't apply to you please don't take offense. I am painting with a very broad brush so do not be offended.

It is very sad when a woman abandons her vow and divorces her husband and leaves.

However if the shoe fits by all means wear it. The replies will show where most stand in this area.

Peace.


Sincerely,
I

Are you sure your username wasn't suppose to be Imperious? [h=1][/h]

 

[cachsux]

Orange brought up the subject as a feeder driver but he could have mentioned any of the jobs at UPS. I think package was tougher once we had a child than feeder has ever been. Regardless, the job most likely is not the cause of a divorce but merely another brick in the wall of a strong marriage of the straw breaking the camels back in a weak one.


In my case my wife also points out her gun has bullets that fly faster than I run so I'm usually on best behavior.

 

[anonymous6]

I just got divorced earlier this year. The wife said I wasn't home enough to give her the attention she needed. She cheated on me with another guy.

you'll be better off in the long run.

 

[anonymous6]

the mighty oak tree is so strong because it has survived thru so much bad weather. same as a marriage. ours has had some really rough spots in the 30 years we have been together. I firmly believe only a small percentage of people would of survived their marriage under similar circumstances. the main reason we stayed together sometimes was for the benefit of the kids. them growing up and grown up. we wanted to set a good example.

and i'm glad we did cause these last 5-7 years have been the best so far. our grown children have had their share of marital problems but they see how their Mom and Pop weathered the storm and came out on the other side better off so that makes the work it out too.

 

[cynic]

Coming up on 27 years.

Unfortunately, the days of people honoring a vow are over. Hell, the days of honor are long gone. Fewer and fewer of us have it, I'm not sure why that is.... But it's not a good thing.

Just passed 29. I'm a boring, stable S.O.B.

You are on the money, very little honor exists anymore. We've become a superficial society, become immune to violence, and have just gotten used to or expect immorality everywhere.

 

[Brownslave688]

I just got divorced earlier this year. The wife said I wasn't home enough to give her the attention she needed. She cheated on me with another guy.

Sounds like she was home too much.

 

[IVE GOTTA PACKAGE 4U]

Sounds like she was home too much.

No. she just wasnt the right girl. my wife used to get pissed at the hours that I worked. but atleast she didnt have to work and spend the time with the kids! Now they are all growups and doing well...thanks to a good mom. I could have worked less hours and she could have taken up a job....but my family is better off Iin the long run.
i

 

[Casual4Life]

I just got divorced earlier this year. The wife said I wasn't home enough to give her the attention she needed. She cheated on me with another guy.

Was in court today and I divorced my wife for that same reason
​

 

[stevetheupsguy]

another driver came into the break room recently and announced he was getting divorced. so we sat around and figured out that almost every feeder driver is working on their 2nd or 3rd marriage. way above the national average of about 52%.

I don't understand. is it our fast food mentality that young people want everything right now? I have been married for almost 30 years and it hasn't all been a walk in the park. lots of ups and downs. while the kids were growing up was the hardest. since they have grown and had kids of their own, it has been mainly sweet.

so what gives? what are your thoughts? is it that most women ( or men to be fair ) want their cake and eat it too? UPS drivers make good money and a lot of our guys are now paying for two families. that is probably why they can't retire.

the really sad thing is that the children are the biggest losers. I tell the younger guys my story and encourage them to somehow work it out for the kids' sake if possible. it's a real shame.

I believe Honor and Allegiance are things of the past. My 2nd Wife divorced me after 12 years and 3 Children. I had a Girlfriend for a year since, but have become very comfortable by myself. The former Mrs and I share our children 50/50, and I probably see her more now than I did before. Besides, I'm so buried in being a world champion athlete, I don't have time for anything more than that, my family and my job. SIGH, I remember how innocently I thought about marriage, when I was younger.