An Elephant Tale! - Page 13 - Brown Cafe

dilligaf · 09-21-2009, 07:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pickup

Sir Dizzee is a scoundrel, Lady Dilligaf. He is leading you down the garden path and as soon as he tires of ye, you will no longer occupy the upper most place of his castle in the air. He bendeth the very fabric of reality. Even now, his evil magicks invade other dominions. The home page of browncafe is now bent out of shape. Right is now left and left is now right.

While I thanketh ye and Sir Babooba for persuading Sir Dizzee in giving me a finer vessel to occupy, I am also ashamed that thou and he have debased thineselves in your petitions on my behalf. I would rather be a pig than to have to have to kiss the ring of Dizee (and only the gods know what ye had to kiss in order to soften his black heart) . I will continue to labour until his evil rule hast diminished.

Do what ye will do to me , Dizzee. It mattereth not to me. No matter what thou dost do to my body, thou can not touch my soul.

P.Seth to Dizzee : your dawgs have no bite, and little bark. My frost giants have have played cowboys and indians and have slayed them both and all . Can anything stop this juggernaut led by a giant from the House of Manning?

Nay Sir Pickup, Tis not Dizzee who be-eth the scoundrel. Tis not Dizzee who leadeth me. Tis thine own Lord of York that haseth the black heart. Tis his own words that hath upended the world as I see it. I will defendeth Dizzee, as I would have defended thine own Lord until I hath learned of his forked tongue, to the end.

Dizzee · 09-21-2009, 11:02 AM

ajblakejr · 09-21-2009, 05:48 PM

Why do I feelth asifth I am watching the last episode of Newhart?

Big Babooba · 09-21-2009, 06:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dizzee

Tony?.......blue bunny slippers?

Say it ain't so!!!

over9five · 09-22-2009, 08:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dizzee

Classic! I love it!

(sorry, "I loveth it")

tonyexpress · 09-22-2009, 10:00 AM

Wow Dizzee I'm impressed with your creativity....

You captured the true essence of how we live in one picture!

Hey BB what's wrong with blue bunny slippers at least my feet stay warm.

NHDRVR · 09-22-2009, 02:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Big Babooba

One night, many years ago, in my Preload days, I was unloading a feeder with my friend Don. He lifted a wooden crate that weighed 70 lbs (our weight limit back then). It was addressed to the nearby Tampax factory. This was our conversation:

“What the hell is Tampax getting this time?”
“Elephant tampon”
“Elephant tampons? Come on now”
“I’m serious”
“A case of elephant tampons?”
“No, a case with an elephant tampon”
“Go on, you’re full of ****. I never heard such a thing”
“Of course not. They don’t advertise all their stuff. You’re not gonna see a Tampax elephant tampon commercial on TV. Not many elephants watch TV. A friend of mine works in quality control there and she told me all about them”
“Really?”
“Yeah. Think about it. Elephants are mammals. Mammals have periods. Thus elephants have periods. It’s a big mess and not a pretty sight. Tampax saw the market and now have it cornered.
If you go to the zoo or circus, you never see an elephant having a period. It’s not good PR. Suppose a little kid sees an elephant during her time. It could have a traumatizing effect on them. ‘Daddy, what’s wrong with the elephant? Mommy look! The elephant is dying!’”
“I never thought about that”
“She told me that they just developed one with an eyebolt. They just hook up a cable and effortlessly winch it out. The old ones had a rope. They would sedate the elephant and four or five guys would play tug of war with it.”
“What does she do?”
“She’s in QC. She runs tests on used product. Women hired as testers send them in by the mail. The big ones come via UPS”
“You mean…..”
“Why do you think it weighs so much? Pop it out, wrap it up and send it off. We’re performing a vital service”
“Ewwwww!”

A supervisor in the background was listening in the whole time. He fought hard to keep from laughing. Towards the end he almost pissed his pants!

How gullible can somebody be?

I am never getting back the 20 seconds it took to read this, am I....

ajblakejr · 09-22-2009, 02:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NHDRVR

I am never getting back the 20 seconds it took to read this, am I....

How gullible can somebody be?

Sorry. The setup was perfect for this...

cheryl · 09-22-2009, 05:39 PM

Wow Dizzee! You're awesome. It's almost like there was a camera in our bedroom.

The only thing I can think of that is different from reality is that the bunny slippers need to be swapped. I usually wear the blue bunny slippers. Tony loves his fuzzy pink ones.

Big Babooba · 09-22-2009, 05:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cheryl

Wow Dizzee! You're awesome. It's almost like there was a camera in our bedroom.

The only thing I can think of that is different from reality is that the bunny slippers need to be swapped. I usually wear the blue bunny slippers. Tony loves his fuzzy pink ones.

I knew it!!!

ajblakejr · 09-22-2009, 05:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cheryl

Tony loves his fuzzy pink ones.

Knight Big, the pinkth foot covers are thine Energizer Bunny Slippers.
Cheryl is the lucky one!!!

fethrs · 09-22-2009, 06:02 PM

Was wondering when someone would notice that.

Dizzee · 09-22-2009, 11:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cheryl

The only thing I can think of that is different from reality is that the bunny slippers need to be swapped. I usually wear the blue bunny slippers. Tony loves his fuzzy pink ones.

Details, details, details....

tonyexpress · 09-23-2009, 09:38 AM

Thanks for taking care of the details Dizz!

Yea....my pink bunny slippers have been moved to their rightful place.

Hoaxster · 09-23-2009, 09:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tonyexpress

Thanks for taking care of the details Dizz!

Yea....my pink bunny slippers have been moved to their rightful place.

Just one more small detail Dizz, Cheryl has all the family jewels so there should not be any on Tony's crown.

over9five · 09-23-2009, 09:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hoaxster

Just one more small detail Dizz, Cheryl has all the family jewels so there should not be any on Tony's crown.

Ya know, I heard some rumors about Tony in another thread somewhere....!!!!!!!!!!!!

Big Babooba · 09-23-2009, 07:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cheryl

Wow Dizzee! You're awesome. It's almost like there was a camera in our bedroom.

The only thing I can think of that is different from reality is that the bunny slippers need to be swapped. I usually wear the blue bunny slippers. Tony loves his fuzzy pink ones.

You better checketh thy bedroom carefully. I trusteth not Dizzee as far as I could thoweth him. He gettith his jollies in strangeth ways.

(BTW Dizzee, I'm notith a prevert, getith my face out of the window!)

Hoaxster · 09-23-2009, 08:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hoaxster

Just one more small detail Dizz, Cheryl has all the family jewels so there should not be any on Tony's crown.

Quote:

Originally Posted by over9five

Ya know, I heard some rumors about Tony in another thread somewhere....!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ovah, you get the feeling we'll be hearing from Cheryl soon?

fethrs · 09-23-2009, 08:15 PM

i just hope it all wasn't a dream..I am so lost.

DS · 09-23-2009, 09:36 PM

Of all the crimes commited by us mortals on this sphere,
One demands the punishment of losing much more than a beard,
The papist mocks our holy host with humor and sarcasm,
he should be drawn and quartered,or shuck down a hellish chasm

He must be made example lest the people start a coup,
he has failed to show allegiance to Queen Cheryl,
he chose the path of alchemy and refused to be a sup,
Now the time has come for him to meet his peril.

The one I speak of hides behind an avitar called hoaxter
he prides himself mischeivious,a comic and a jokester
When some protest,he speaks in jest,and makes them laugh instead
the hangman says forget the noose,Im chopping off his head.

Big Babooba · 09-23-2009, 10:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DS

Of all the crimes commited by us mortals on this sphere,
One demands the punishment of losing much more than a beard,
The papist mocks our holy host with humor and sarcasm,
he should be drawn and quartered,or shuck down a hellish chasm

He must be made example lest the people start a coup,
he has failed to show allegiance to Queen Cheryl,
he chose the path of alchemy and refused to be a sup,
Now the time has come for him to meet his peril.

The one I speak of hides behind an avitar called hoaxter
he prides himself mischeivious,a comic and a jokester
When some protest,he speaks in jest,and makes them laugh instead
the hangman says forget the noose,Im chopping off his head.

Let the Hoaxster keep his head. Give him the Japanese Sadism Chair instead.

YouTube - Sadism Chair

Hoaxster · 09-24-2009, 03:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DS

Of all the crimes commited by us mortals on this sphere,
One demands the punishment of losing much more than a beard,
The papist mocks our holy host with humor and sarcasm,
he should be drawn and quartered,or shuck down a hellish chasm

He must be made example lest the people start a coup,
he has failed to show allegiance to Queen Cheryl,
he chose the path of alchemy and refused to be a sup,
Now the time has come for him to meet his peril.

The one I speak of hides behind an avitar called hoaxter
he prides himself mischeivious,a comic and a jokester
When some protest,he speaks in jest,and makes them laugh instead
the hangman says forget the noose,Im chopping off his head.

liketh

pickup · 09-24-2009, 08:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cheryl

Wow Dizzee! You're awesome. It's almost like there was a camera in our bedroom.

The only thing I can think of that is different from reality is that the bunny slippers need to be swapped. I usually wear the blue bunny slippers. Tony loves his fuzzy pink ones.

Oh My god... "Dizzee, you are so wonderful.. Dizzee you're a genius.... dizee, it's great but could you just change this? It's a good thing you did Dizzee."

This nightmare has to end. While he is reading this and focusing on my post, will someone bash the monster over the head with a heavy object and end this nightmare?

I have video proof of who this Dizzee is . He was once a little boy that terrorized a small town known as Peeksville in Ohio.

If no one puts an end to him, I fully expect to end up as a jack in the box , stuck out in the cornfield. But that is the risk I take.

Here's the proof:

YouTube - It's A good Life/ pt. 3

over9five · 09-24-2009, 09:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hoaxster

Ovah, you get the feeling we'll be hearing from Cheryl soon?

I think we could find ourselves....... moderated!

cheryl · 09-24-2009, 11:03 AM

It has been decreed that hoax and over shall be stoned for their display of wicked and clever wit.

YouTube - Stoning