When individuals talk, gripe or complain about someone I have many times heard some wise people respond to the griper, "Keep the focus on yourself".
I say these people are wise because I think this is a wise statement.
This does not mean to be more selfish or self-centered, because most people who talk, gripe or complain about others are extremely self-centered.
In fact this self-centeredness is the root cause of many problems in life.