UPS security makes fark.com - Brown Cafe

100088 · 09-01-2008, 08:41 PM

Here is the link. What an embarrassment.

http://www.pittsburghlive.com/x/pitt.../s_585863.html

(Pittsburgh Tribune-Review) If you live in Western PA and UPS has lost your package deliveries, it may be because the local UPS director of security is busy tracking the 100 UFO sightings in the state since June

I found this on fark.com

skipnstones · 09-01-2008, 08:49 PM

I'm OK with the little green men (or whatever color they are) so long as they lighten up on the anal probing.

That alone would make me not like 'em.

I suspect this guy is a great security director. The UFO wackos are pretty nervous and jittery about gubment cover-ups and he prolly views EVERYONE with suspicion at his facility. Maybe he's trying to figure out which of the package handlers have infiltrated his site!

Baba gounj · 09-01-2008, 09:41 PM

WOW
I guess UPS really wants some new sales leads.

diesel96 · 09-01-2008, 09:47 PM

I'd like to see this LP guy fire me for stealing time.....but your honor he's a member of MUFON....Mutal UFO Network

skipnstones · 09-01-2008, 10:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by diesel96

I'd like to see this LP guy fire me for stealing time.....but your honor he's a member of MUFON....Mutal UFO Network

I object, your honour, on the grounds that this guy is a wingnut and is chewing on aluminum foil so the martians won't be able to read his thoughts.

upsdude · 09-02-2008, 02:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by diesel96

I'd like to see this LP guy fire me for stealing time.....but your honor he's a member of MUFON....Mutal UFO Network

.........and an associate member or Buffoons United.

Big Babooba · 09-02-2008, 07:27 AM

I once made a delivery from Monavie to a house out in the country. I DRed it to the side door. When I got back to the truck, an alien spacecraft appeared overhead. A tractor beam shot down to the delivery point. I watched in anguish as the package ascended to the craft. An ET stuck its head through the portal, winked and waved to me. I yelled up to it that Quabbin watah tastes much bettah. Then ZIP! it was gone. I realized that I would soon have a follow up for that stop. Should I alert the proper authorities or keep my mouth shut?

trplnkl · 09-02-2008, 08:09 AM

That article makes me wonder if this guy's mind set is why he has the job he has, of if the job he has is the cause of his mind set.

skipnstones · 09-02-2008, 08:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Big Babooba

I once made a delivery from Monavie to a house out in the country. I DRed it to the side door. When I got back to the truck, an alien spacecraft appeared overhead. A tractor beam shot down to the delivery point. I watched in anguish as the package ascended to the craft. An ET stuck its head through the portal, winked and waved to me. I yelled up to it that Quabbin watah tastes much bettah. Then ZIP! it was gone. I realized that I would soon have a follow up for that stop. Should I alert the proper authorities or keep my mouth shut?

If you got the package there on time, then I would keep my mouth shut. ET can only say "phone home" anyway!!

09-02-2008, 05:05 PM

I met him years ago and he's the best Security Dept Head at UPS. Not sure why he isn't in Corp. If he says it's real then it is. It's OK to be a skeptic, but be an informed one!!

705red · 09-02-2008, 05:35 PM

Maybe

705red · 09-02-2008, 05:36 PM

maybe ups has him exploring new business oppurtunities. The first delivery to mars an the brown space shuttle.

How could he sit there and ever accuse someone of wrong doing?

Mike Hawk · 09-02-2008, 05:39 PM

Quote:

"We have not received any intelligence this is going to occur. But If this is going to occur we know they will come in peace," said department spokesman Dan Stevens.

lol

DS · 09-02-2008, 06:44 PM

at 3000 mph we should be afraid of competition
cuz thats like ultra sonic

worldwide · 09-02-2008, 07:00 PM

Who cares what this guy does on his own time or what he believes. What does his life outside of UPS have to do with his life inside UPS? Is he breaking any laws?

over9five · 09-02-2008, 08:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 705red

How could he sit there and ever accuse someone of wrong doing?

And here is the $10,000 question! This guy would be laughed out of the office in any ~~interrogation~~ errrr investigation!

"You say you saw me steal a package? Was that before or after you saw the UFO??"
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

This guys career is over after that article. Never should have mentioned UPS.

09-02-2008, 09:27 PM

I met this guy as well and he would make you cry in an interview. When you are at UPS all day dealing with idiots it is nice to have a hobby that takes your mind off the bad stuff.

wornoutupser · 09-03-2008, 04:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DS

at 3000 mph we should be afraid of competition
cuz thats like ultra sonic

Thats the secret!
UPS wants to make our cars go faster and they want to make contact!

over9five · 09-03-2008, 05:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TN1

I met him years ago and he's the best Security Dept Head at UPS. Not sure why he isn't in Corp. If he says it's real then it is. It's OK to be a skeptic, but be an informed one!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by nun ya

I met this guy as well and he would make you cry in an interview. When you are at UPS all day dealing with idiots it is nice to have a hobby that takes your mind off the bad stuff.

Welcome to BrownCafe, Mr. Ventre.

IMHO, anyone who has to deal with someone who is a coordinator for a UFO network is dealing with an idiot.

LKLND3380 · 09-03-2008, 08:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Big Babooba

I once made a delivery from Monavie to a house out in the country. I DRed it to the side door. When I got back to the truck, an alien spacecraft appeared overhead. A tractor beam shot down to the delivery point. I watched in anguish as the package ascended to the craft. An ET stuck its head through the portal, winked and waved to me. I yelled up to it that Quabbin watah tastes much bettah. Then ZIP! it was gone. I realized that I would soon have a follow up for that stop. Should I alert the proper authorities or keep my mouth shut?

Aliens will use "other" addresses since they have no permanent residence on earth. I bet if you check into the package was never filed as lost/missing/stolen, etc...

tieguy · 09-03-2008, 09:33 AM

I don't understand the big deal. Obviously this guy is looking to expand the business to new markets. Fdx , DHL and the post office do not have anyone exploring extra terrestrial markets. Its this type of innovation that will provide a secure future for all of us.....

Big Babooba · 09-03-2008, 04:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LKLND3380

Aliens will use "other" addresses since they have no permanent residence on earth. I bet if you check into the package was never filed as lost/missing/stolen, etc...

You obviously don't know what you are talking about and you obviously haven't met my neighbors.

YouTube - Coneheads Movie Trailer

705red · 09-04-2008, 10:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tieguy

I don't understand the big deal. Obviously this guy is looking to expand the business to new markets. Fdx , DHL and the post office do not have anyone exploring extra terrestrial markets. Its this type of innovation that will provide a secure future for all of us.....

Well now that seems like a problem! Maybe fedex and dhl have no alien hunting restrictions on employment while ups allows it.

Maybe this is the new technology that davis wants to intall to spy on us and he has this lp whack job trying to make contact to assist ups.

At 3000 miles an hour good luck tracking my gps!

tieguy · 09-04-2008, 11:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 705red

Well now that seems like a problem! Maybe fedex and dhl have no alien hunting restrictions on employment while ups allows it.

Maybe this is the new technology that davis wants to intall to spy on us and he has this lp whack job trying to make contact to assist ups.

At 3000 miles an hour good luck tracking my gps!

comon red you need to jump on the bandwagon. you could possibly create a true international union here. Venetians local 502, orcan local 711. Why someday you could threaten to shut the galaxy down with a strike.

Big Babooba · 09-04-2008, 07:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tieguy

comon red you need to jump on the bandwagon. you could possibly create a true international union here. Venetians local 502, orcan local 711. Why someday you could threaten to shut the galaxy down with a strike.

Don't you mean an intergalactic union?