Complaints

barnyard

KTM rider
I read a concern note in the office while eating lunch about an old lady complaining that out driver was backing dangerously into her driveway and running over her cats! World's slowest cats? Reminds me of the old Monty Python Parrot Sketch.

I hit a pigeon in someone's driveway a bunch of years ago, probably 7 or 8 now. Turns out, it was a pet. She called in and wanted UPS to replace it. Center manager talked to her a bunch and UPS did not pay to replace it. I was told that if we did pay, I would have been charged with an accident. I was advised by quite a few people not to talk to the people about it or anything like that.

I delivered there about a month ago. The woman was home, so I introduced myself, asked if she lived there about 8 years ago and I apologized. She started laughing and said, "Be right back." Her best friend is an HR person with UPS and jokes with her about the pigeon constantly and she wanted to show me the pigeon ornament she received for Christmas from the HR person. She thought it was pretty funny that people still give me crap about it.

When she called in, she thought I had to have come speeding in to her yard to hit it. I had actually seen them, slowed way down, honked and thought they had gotten out of the way. I was pretty darn surprised to see the one had been hit. I thought at the time, it was pretty surprising they did not fly away. No one was home at the time and my mistake was not throwing it into the tall grass. I just moved it to the side of the driveway.
 

1BROWNWRENCH

Amatuer Malthusian
I hit a pigeon in someone's driveway a bunch of years ago, probably 7 or 8 now. Turns out, it was a pet. She called in and wanted UPS to replace it. Center manager talked to her a bunch and UPS did not pay to replace it. I was told that if we did pay, I would have been charged with an accident. I was advised by quite a few people not to talk to the people about it or anything like that.

I delivered there about a month ago. The woman was home, so I introduced myself, asked if she lived there about 8 years ago and I apologized. She started laughing and said, "Be right back." Her best friend is an HR person with UPS and jokes with her about the pigeon constantly and she wanted to show me the pigeon ornament she received for Christmas from the HR person. She thought it was pretty funny that people still give me crap about it.

When she called in, she thought I had to have come speeding in to her yard to hit it. I had actually seen them, slowed way down, honked and thought they had gotten out of the way. I was pretty darn surprised to see the one had been hit. I thought at the time, it was pretty surprising they did not fly away. No one was home at the time and my mistake was not throwing it into the tall grass. I just moved it to the side of the driveway.

Maybe this tops it. I RAN OVER, not hit, a pigeon on I-5 with my old Suzuki! The darn thing flew down from the overhead sign and landed right in the middle of the HOV lane. Went right under my front wheel at 70. Shoulda seen the cloud of feathers my buddy behind me rode through!
 

BCFan

Well-Known Member
My last mixer cost $339+tax(s&h free). Yes, it was a Today's Special VAlue from QVC. It's the 6 qt pro model. I'd be freaking out if someone bought mine for me as a gift.
That's not a hint. I have two, now. :happy-very:

The bag boy at Wegman's is kinda cute. I could teach him a thing or two. :winks:
DAYUM!!!! BC
 

barnyard

KTM rider
Maybe this tops it. I RAN OVER, not hit, a pigeon on I-5 with my old Suzuki! The darn thing flew down from the overhead sign and landed right in the middle of the HOV lane. Went right under my front wheel at 70. Shoulda seen the cloud of feathers my buddy behind me rode through!

I hit a goose on my cycle. Hit my left handlebar, which opened it up, spun, hit my helmet, which turned my head enough so that I could see it pinwheel into the front of a cabover semi, where is EXPLODED. I had goose blood all over my helmet and it bent my wedding band. I am convinced that years of dirtbike racing gave me the skills to avoid a fatal crash (if I had gone down, the semi would have ran me over.)
 

1BROWNWRENCH

Amatuer Malthusian
I hit a goose on my cycle. Hit my left handlebar, which opened it up, spun, hit my helmet, which turned my head enough so that I could see it pinwheel into the front of a cabover semi, where is EXPLODED. I had goose blood all over my helmet and it bent my wedding band. I am convinced that years of dirtbike racing gave me the skills to avoid a fatal crash (if I had gone down, the semi would have ran me over.)


Barnyard 1, 1BROWNWRENCH 0 Guess I won't tell about the cat and numerous Kamikaze squirrels. Had a close one with a buzzard-like thing in CA and numerous brownpants incidents with deer.
 

barnyard

KTM rider
The 1st enduro I ran as in the senior class, I swerved to miss a family of goslings, my front wheel when out from under me and I landed on my side on a big rock. I was wearing a chest protector, but landed on the gap between the chest protector and back protector.

The geese won that round. I cracked a couple of ribs and missed the next enduro. I did get a year end trophy that year though. The guy doing the awards lived about 3 miles from the pigeon lady and I told him about it. My 2nd place trophy was awarded to me with feathers glued all over it.

I used to race with a bunch of comedians.
 

1BROWNWRENCH

Amatuer Malthusian
Yeah , I guess! I remember having just 1 cracked rib and it hurt just to breathe! Does anybody know how the Dakar rally went this year? All I know is a rider got killed inbetween stages.
 

browned_out

Well-Known Member
Had a delivery the other day to a house, I get to the door and ring the bell and leave the pkg, as I get back to the truck a lady opens the door and (clearly angry) says I have children sleeping don't ring the doorbell!! I say, How am I supposed to know that, maybe you should post a note or something.
 

TxRoadDawg

Well-Known Member
made the mistake of answering the phone one day for an oms, idiot is pissed that he told the company ship it on his ups business account which they did. he thought using his account would automatically send it to his home address. Also had one or two complaints from people too stupid to realize just because I work for ups does NOT mean I care about their problems when I'm at my other job or drinking at the bar. some bs about not being friendly enough LMAO
 

10veleze

Active Member
Besides the "Driver left note,never rang or knocked", whats the weirdest complaint you've gotten. My all timer is, "Driver must have been eating when he delivered package because I now have ants and mice" LOL. And yes,someone actually took that complaint.

Don't knock my door while I'm watching TV.
 

soberups

Pees in the brown Koolaid
If I drive half a mile up your potholed driveway in the dark, make an 8 pt turnaround in a giant puddle, walk up your rotten, moss-covered steps in the pouring rain and fill out a delivery notice while your muddy, barking dogs jump all over me as I make a delivery attempt on your signature required package...do NOT call the center to complain that I never knocked or rang your bell.

Have some integrity. If you were at home and in the shower...or sitting on the john...or knocking out a quickie with the wife when I came to the door... just be honest about it and there is about a 99% chance that I will do the right thing and make a 2nd attempt later in the day even though I'm really not required to. Hey, I've been there. I'm a reasonable guy, and I know what its like to be anxiously waiting for a package only to miss it thru no fault of my own. The customer is always right...until they lie and try to make up some stupid, bullschitt story about me sneaking up to the damn door on tiptoes and quietly leaving a delivery notice without knocking. Once that happens, you go into my personal "schitthead" file and I will do everything I can to make sure that any future deliveries you might be expecting will show up late, wet and broken. Are we clear?
 

TxRoadDawg

Well-Known Member
If I drive half a mile up your potholed driveway in the dark, make an 8 pt turnaround in a giant puddle, walk up your rotten, moss-covered steps in the pouring rain and fill out a delivery notice while your muddy, barking dogs jump all over me as I make a delivery attempt on your signature required package...do NOT call the center to complain that I never knocked or rang your bell.

Have some integrity. If you were at home and in the shower...or sitting on the john...or knocking out a quickie with the wife when I came to the door... just be honest about it and there is about a 99% chance that I will do the right thing and make a 2nd attempt later in the day even though I'm really not required to. Hey, I've been there. I'm a reasonable guy, and I know what its like to be anxiously waiting for a package only to miss it thru no fault of my own. The customer is always right...until they lie and try to make up some stupid, bullschitt story about me sneaking up to the damn door on tiptoes and quietly leaving a delivery notice without knocking. Once that happens, you go into my personal "schitthead" file and I will do everything I can to make sure that any future deliveries you might be expecting will show up late, wet and broken. Are we clear?
got witnesses? :surprised:
 
J

jibbs

Guest
If I drive half a mile up your potholed driveway in the dark, make an 8 pt turnaround in a giant puddle, walk up your rotten, moss-covered steps in the pouring rain and fill out a delivery notice while your muddy, barking dogs jump all over me as I make a delivery attempt on your signature required package...do NOT call the center to complain that I never knocked or rang your bell.

Have some integrity. If you were at home and in the shower...or sitting on the john...or knocking out a quickie with the wife when I came to the door... just be honest about it and there is about a 99% chance that I will do the right thing and make a 2nd attempt later in the day even though I'm really not required to. Hey, I've been there. I'm a reasonable guy, and I know what its like to be anxiously waiting for a package only to miss it thru no fault of my own. The customer is always right...until they lie and try to make up some stupid, bullschitt story about me sneaking up to the damn door on tiptoes and quietly leaving a delivery notice without knocking. Once that happens, you go into my personal "schitthead" file and I will do everything I can to make sure that any future deliveries you might be expecting will show up late, wet and broken. Are we clear?


Just curious, would it change anything if they had said that they didn't hear the doorbell or a knock and just weren't sure if there was one? Sometimes people don't want to fess up to the more intimate, private parts of their lives, regardless of if doing so would make their endeavor any easier.
 

soberups

Pees in the brown Koolaid
If I drive half a mile up your potholed driveway in the dark, make an 8 pt turnaround in a giant puddle, walk up your rotten, moss-covered steps in the pouring rain and fill out a delivery notice while your muddy, barking dogs jump all over me as I make a delivery attempt on your signature required package...do NOT call the center to complain that I never knocked or rang your bell.

Have some integrity. If you were at home and in the shower...or sitting on the john...or knocking out a quickie with the wife when I came to the door... just be honest about it and there is about a 99% chance that I will do the right thing and make a 2nd attempt later in the day even though I'm really not required to. Hey, I've been there. I'm a reasonable guy, and I know what its like to be anxiously waiting for a package only to miss it thru no fault of my own. The customer is always right...until they lie and try to make up some stupid, bullschitt story about me sneaking up to the damn door on tiptoes and quietly leaving a delivery notice without knocking. Once that happens, you go into my personal "schitthead" file and I will do everything I can to make sure that any future deliveries you might be expecting will show up late, wet and broken. Are we clear?


Just curious, would it change anything if they had said that they didn't hear the doorbell or a knock and just weren't sure if there was one? Sometimes people don't want to fess up to the more intimate, private parts of their lives, regardless of if doing so would make their endeavor any easier.

Absolutely. Theres a big difference between admitting that you didnt hear the bell and accusing the driver of a dishonest act.
 
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