Big Babooba
Well-Known Member
My center manager called my steward and me into the office. He wasn’t happy.
“Big has a problem,” he told my steward.
“Why’s that?” I asked.
“You don’t show up on any reports. Not a single one. Not paid over, no Telematics violations, no missed packages or pickups – nothing.
“Well that’s good.” Chimed in my steward.
“NO! That’s bad! You have to be perfect to stay off of the lists.”
“I guess I’m good.” I replied.
“ Like hell you are! Nobody’s perfect. Not even you!” he retorted. “I haven’t slept in three months. I’ve been up nights thinking of a way to get your name on a report. I know that you're up to something. How do you do it?”
“You got a great driver here.” Said my steward.
“Well I finally came up with a solution!” He chuckled, “ I have a new report – Drivers Who Don’t Show Up On Reports.” Now Big, here’s the problem. There are 120 drivers in this building, yet there is only one name on this report – yours!”
“If my name isn’t on any reports, than how can it be on a report?” I asked. He looked dumbfounded. I thought that I had him.
“ Don’t be smart. This is serious.” He raised his voice, “You’re the only person on this report and I expect you to get your name off of it immediately! Do you understand? I'll be watching you. Now go out and have a good day.”
“Big has a problem,” he told my steward.
“Why’s that?” I asked.
“You don’t show up on any reports. Not a single one. Not paid over, no Telematics violations, no missed packages or pickups – nothing.
“Well that’s good.” Chimed in my steward.
“NO! That’s bad! You have to be perfect to stay off of the lists.”
“I guess I’m good.” I replied.
“ Like hell you are! Nobody’s perfect. Not even you!” he retorted. “I haven’t slept in three months. I’ve been up nights thinking of a way to get your name on a report. I know that you're up to something. How do you do it?”
“You got a great driver here.” Said my steward.
“Well I finally came up with a solution!” He chuckled, “ I have a new report – Drivers Who Don’t Show Up On Reports.” Now Big, here’s the problem. There are 120 drivers in this building, yet there is only one name on this report – yours!”
“If my name isn’t on any reports, than how can it be on a report?” I asked. He looked dumbfounded. I thought that I had him.
“ Don’t be smart. This is serious.” He raised his voice, “You’re the only person on this report and I expect you to get your name off of it immediately! Do you understand? I'll be watching you. Now go out and have a good day.”
