Funny customer stories

currahee

Well-Known Member
Does anyone have any good stories about weird or stupid things customers have done?
I had this customer that everyone time he would sign, I would ask his last name he hold diad real close to his face and say his last name. At first i just thought he was a little fruity, but after a while i figured out what he was doing . He was talking into the speaker to record his last name.
Do i tell him that it wasnt recoding or do i let him keep doing it. Of course i let him keep doing it i thought it was funny as hell.
 

filthpig

Well-Known Member
I had one of my regulars (everyday for 7 yrs.) blow her head off at 9:30 am at the rear door of one of my big deliveries. Nicest person you could imagine. Just had a screw loose, I guess. Still think about her from time to time.
 

filthpig

Well-Known Member
I had one of my regulars (everyday for 7 yrs.) blow her head off at 9:30 am at the rear door of one of my big deliveries. Nicest person you could imagine. Just had a screw loose, I guess. Still think about her from time to time.
not funny, but weird
 

Big Babooba

Well-Known Member
I walked into a customer's welding shop and the owner was wearing a neck brace. I asked him what the hell happened to you?
His brother told me that I would never believe it if I didn't see it happen. The guy wearing the coller told me that he wouldn't tell me because I would laugh at him. I promised not to laugh and he told me this story.

He was at a stripper bar with his brother when it happened. He was sitting at the bar feeding the dancers dollar bills. One of the girls was doing high kicks a la the Rockettes. He called her over to him and gave her a five. She starts kicking and he's yelling higher. Her last kick was so high that she knocked a mirrored disco ball off of its mount. Of course he was sitting directly below it and it landed square on the top of his head.
He said the worst part was telling his wife about it.

I broke my promise.
 

dannyboy

From the promised LAND
I had an auto repair shop that was out in the sticks. He had several goats that he kept in the shop, several of the really small ones. One day I had a cash cod for him. He took me into the office, where one of the kids was munching down on what was left of the bank envelope. 1300 bucks that goat ate. I would have gotten it back out right away.

I had to come back on that one the next day.

d
 

mattwtrs

Retired Senior Member
I had an auto repair shop that was out in the sticks. He had several goats that he kept in the shop, several of the really small ones. One day I had a cash cod for him. He took me into the office, where one of the kids was munching down on what was left of the bank envelope. 1300 bucks that goat ate. I would have gotten it back out right away.

I had to come back on that one the next day.

d
That's what I loved about working @ UPS. The real life stories were always better than any fiction.
 

Big Babooba

Well-Known Member
I had an auto repair shop that was out in the sticks. He had several goats that he kept in the shop, several of the really small ones. One day I had a cash cod for him. He took me into the office, where one of the kids was munching down on what was left of the bank envelope. 1300 bucks that goat ate. I would have gotten it back out right away.

I had to come back on that one the next day.

d
Did he pay the COD with "processed" money? Did you need rubber gloves?
 

Harley Rider

34 yrs & done!
Back years ago when we first started on DIAD I nearly cracked a rib laughing at a woman. She was kind of dingy but not stupid. Anyway I handed her the DIAD to sign. After signing it she looked at her signature and didn't like the way it looked. She says "Thats terrible! Can I erase it?" She turns the board upside down like an Etch a Sketch and starts shaking it. It was too funny!
 

wadep

Well-Known Member
One lady I delivered to asked me what the round speaker area was on diad 3. I let her know that very shortly we will be switching to retinal scanning. Well about 3 months later and me in a mood, I pull in and hand her the package and tell her retinal scanning is all up and running. Just stare into the round area and when it beeps the scan will be done and from then on I'll just have to wave the diad within 10 feet of her. NO MORE SIGNING. Well she sticks the diad to her face, I push a button and it beeps. I tell her all done and damn near fall over I'm laffin so hard. Her manager is standing right behind her holding onto the wall for dear life as he's busting a gut. 4 years later and we still laugh about it.
 
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