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Life After Brown
Heard Any Good Ones: Part 2
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<blockquote data-quote="moreluck" data-source="post: 1245258" data-attributes="member: 1246"><p><strong>New Years Eve One Liners A New Year’s resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other.</strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p> <strong>My new year’s resolution is to be more optimistic by keeping my cup half-full with either rum, vodka, or whiskey.</strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p> <strong>New Years Eve is the only acceptable time to wear body glitter without being mistaken for a stripper.</strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong>I'm getting drunk just thinking about tomorrow night.</strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p> <strong>My New Year’s resolution is to stop hanging out with people who ask me about my New Year’s resolutions.</strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p> <strong>I have only one resolution. To rediscover the difference between wants and needs. May I have all I need and want all I have. Happy New Year!</strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p> <strong>If 2013 was a person, I’d sue him for pain and suffering and lost wages.</strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p> <strong>This New Year’s I resolve to be less awesome since that is really the only thing I do in excess.</strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p> <strong>People treat New Year’s like some sort of life-changing event. If your life sucked last year, it’s probably still going to suck Jan. 2nd..</strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p> <strong>I'll remember 2013 like it was yesterday.</strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p> <strong>May all your troubles last as long as your New Year resolutions.</strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p> <strong>I want to get so drunk that if vampires bit my neck they'd get a Bloody Mary.</strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p> <strong>Many things can be preserved in alcohol this New Years Eve. DIGNITY is not one of them.</strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p> <strong>I'm planning on finding new and interesting things to hate about my job in 2014.</strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p> <strong>Just heard that in 2014 there will be a new device that can turn thoughts into speech. I have had that for years, it’s called alcohol.</strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p> <strong>My New Years Resolution is to break my New Years Resolutions....That way I succeed at something!</strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p> <strong>Anyone who says that alcohol is a depressant isn’t drinking enough of it.</strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p> <strong>I'm actually feeling pretty okay about not accomplishing anything this year.</strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p> <strong>There have been many times in 2013, when I have annoyed you, distubed you, irritated you, and bugged the hell out of you....today I just wanna tell you I plan to continue in 2014!</strong></p><p><strong></strong></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="moreluck, post: 1245258, member: 1246"] [B]New Years Eve One Liners A New Year’s resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other. My new year’s resolution is to be more optimistic by keeping my cup half-full with either rum, vodka, or whiskey. New Years Eve is the only acceptable time to wear body glitter without being mistaken for a stripper. I'm getting drunk just thinking about tomorrow night. My New Year’s resolution is to stop hanging out with people who ask me about my New Year’s resolutions. I have only one resolution. To rediscover the difference between wants and needs. May I have all I need and want all I have. Happy New Year! If 2013 was a person, I’d sue him for pain and suffering and lost wages. This New Year’s I resolve to be less awesome since that is really the only thing I do in excess. People treat New Year’s like some sort of life-changing event. If your life sucked last year, it’s probably still going to suck Jan. 2nd.. I'll remember 2013 like it was yesterday. May all your troubles last as long as your New Year resolutions. I want to get so drunk that if vampires bit my neck they'd get a Bloody Mary. Many things can be preserved in alcohol this New Years Eve. DIGNITY is not one of them. I'm planning on finding new and interesting things to hate about my job in 2014. Just heard that in 2014 there will be a new device that can turn thoughts into speech. I have had that for years, it’s called alcohol. My New Years Resolution is to break my New Years Resolutions....That way I succeed at something! Anyone who says that alcohol is a depressant isn’t drinking enough of it. I'm actually feeling pretty okay about not accomplishing anything this year. There have been many times in 2013, when I have annoyed you, distubed you, irritated you, and bugged the hell out of you....today I just wanna tell you I plan to continue in 2014! [/B] [/QUOTE]
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Heard Any Good Ones: Part 2
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