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Life After Brown
Heard Any Good Ones: Part 2
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<blockquote data-quote="moreluck" data-source="post: 237842" data-attributes="member: 1246"><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">At dawn the telephone rings.</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"Hello, Señor Jones? This is Ernesto the caretaker at your country house."</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"Ah yes, Ernesto. What can I do for you? Is there a problem?"</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"Um, I am just calling to advise you, Señor Jones that your parrot died."</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"My parrot? Dead? The one that won the International competition?"</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"Si, Señor, that's the one."</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"Damn! That's a pity! I spent a small fortune on that bird... What did he die from?"</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"From eating horse meat, Señor Jones."</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"Horse meat? Who the hell fed him horse meat?"</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"Nobody, Señor. He ate the meat of the dead horse."</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"Dead horse? What dead horse?"</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"The thoroughbred, Señor Jones."</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"My prize thoroughbred is dead?"</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"Si, Señor Jones, he died from all that work pulling the water cart."</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"Are you insane? What water cart?"</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"The one we used to put out the fire, Señor"</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"Good Lord! What fire are you talking about, man?"</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"The one at your house, Señor! A candle fell and the curtains caught on fire.</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"What the hell?!....Are you saying that my mansion is destroyed because of some stupid candle?!"</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"Si , Señor Jones."</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"But there's electricity at the house! What was the candle for?"</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"For the funeral, Señor Jones."</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"WHAT BLOODY FUNERAL?!"</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"Your wife's, Señor Jones... She showed up one night out of the blue and I thought she was a burglar. So I hit her with your new Tiger Woods Nike Driver."</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">LONG SILENCE.............</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="color: #0d0881"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">"Ernesto, if you broke that driver, you're in deep <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/group1/censored2.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":censored2:" title="Censored2 :censored2:" data-shortname=":censored2:" />..."</span></span></span></span></span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="moreluck, post: 237842, member: 1246"] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=#0d0881][COLOR=#0d0881][FONT=Arial]At dawn the telephone rings.[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=#0d0881][COLOR=#0d0881][FONT=Arial]"Hello, Señor Jones? This is Ernesto the caretaker at your country house."[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=#0d0881][COLOR=#0d0881][FONT=Arial]"Ah yes, Ernesto. What can I do for you? Is there a problem?"[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=#0d0881][COLOR=#0d0881][FONT=Arial]"Um, I am just calling to advise you, Señor Jones that your parrot died."[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=#0d0881][COLOR=#0d0881][FONT=Arial]"My parrot? Dead? The one that won the International competition?"[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=#0d0881][COLOR=#0d0881][FONT=Arial]"Si, Señor, that's the one."[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=#0d0881][COLOR=#0d0881][FONT=Arial]"Damn! That's a pity! I spent a small fortune on that bird... What did he die from?"[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=#0d0881][COLOR=#0d0881][FONT=Arial]"From eating horse meat, Señor Jones."[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=#0d0881][COLOR=#0d0881][FONT=Arial]"Horse meat? Who the hell fed him horse meat?"[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=#0d0881][COLOR=#0d0881][FONT=Arial]"Nobody, Señor. He ate the meat of the dead horse."[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=#0d0881][COLOR=#0d0881][FONT=Arial]"Dead horse? What dead horse?"[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=#0d0881][COLOR=#0d0881][FONT=Arial]"The thoroughbred, Señor Jones."[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=#0d0881][COLOR=#0d0881][FONT=Arial]"My prize thoroughbred is dead?"[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=#0d0881][COLOR=#0d0881][FONT=Arial]"Si, Señor Jones, he died from all that work pulling the water cart."[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=#0d0881][COLOR=#0d0881][FONT=Arial]"Are you insane? What water cart?"[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=#0d0881][COLOR=#0d0881][FONT=Arial]"The one we used to put out the fire, Señor"[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=#0d0881][COLOR=#0d0881][FONT=Arial]"Good Lord! What fire are you talking about, man?"[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=#0d0881][COLOR=#0d0881][FONT=Arial]"The one at your house, Señor! A candle fell and the curtains caught on fire.[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=#0d0881][COLOR=#0d0881][FONT=Arial]"What the hell?!....Are you saying that my mansion is destroyed because of some stupid candle?!"[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=#0d0881][COLOR=#0d0881][FONT=Arial]"Si , Señor Jones."[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=#0d0881][COLOR=#0d0881][FONT=Arial]"But there's electricity at the house! What was the candle for?"[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=#0d0881][COLOR=#0d0881][FONT=Arial]"For the funeral, Señor Jones."[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=#0d0881][COLOR=#0d0881][FONT=Arial]"WHAT BLOODY FUNERAL?!"[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=#0d0881][COLOR=#0d0881][FONT=Arial]"Your wife's, Señor Jones... She showed up one night out of the blue and I thought she was a burglar. So I hit her with your new Tiger Woods Nike Driver."[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=#0d0881][COLOR=#0d0881][FONT=Arial]LONG SILENCE.............[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=#0d0881][COLOR=#0d0881][FONT=Arial]"Ernesto, if you broke that driver, you're in deep :censored:..."[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [/QUOTE]
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Heard Any Good Ones: Part 2
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