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Life After Brown
Heard Any Good Ones: Part 2
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<blockquote data-quote="moreluck" data-source="post: 364591" data-attributes="member: 1246"><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">A PARENT'S GLOSSARY OF KIDS KITCHEN TERMS:</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">APPETIZING: Anything advertised on TV.</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">BOIL: The point a parent reaches upon hearing the automatic "Yuck" before a food is even tasted.</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">CASSEROLE: Combination of favorite foods that go uneaten because they are mixed together.</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">CHAIR: Spot left vacant by mid-meal bathroom visit.</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">COOKIE (LAST ONE): Item that must be eaten in front of a sibling.</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">CRUST: Part of a sandwich saved for the starving children of another country.</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">DESSERTS: The reason for eating a meal.</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">EVAPORATE: Magic trick performed by children when it comes time to clear the table or wash dishes.</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">FAT: Microscopic substance detected visually by children on pieces of meat they do not wish to eat.</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">FLOOR: Place for all food not found on lap or chair.</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">FORK: Eating utensil made obsolete by discovery of fingers.</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">FRIED FOODS: Gourmet cooking</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">FROZEN: Condition of children's jaws when Spinach is served.</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">FRUIT: A natural sweet not to be confused with dessert.</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">GERMS: The only thing kids will share freely.</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">KITCHEN: The only room not used when eating crumbly snacks.</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">LEFTOVERS: Commonly described as "gross."</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">LIVER: A food that affects genes, creating a hereditary dislike.</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">LOLLIPOP: A snack provided by people who don't have to pay dental bills.</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">MACARONI: Material for a collage.</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">MEASURING CUP: A kitchen utensil that is stored in the sandbox.</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">NAPKIN: Any warm cloth object, such as shirt or pants.</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">NATURAL FOOD: Food eaten with unwashed hands.</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">NUTRITION: Secret war waged by parents using direct commands, camouflage, and constant guard duty.</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">PLATE: A breakable Frisbee.</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">REFRIGERATOR: A very expensive and inefficient room air conditioner when not being used as an art gallery.</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">SALIVA: A medium for blowing bubbles.</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">SODA POP: Shake'N Spray.</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">TABLE: A place for storing gum.</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">TABLE LEG: Percussion instrument</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">THIRSTY: How your child feels after you've said your final "good night."</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">VEGETABLE: A basic food known to satisfy kid's hunger —but only by sight.</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">WATER: The cola of underdeveloped countries. </span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="moreluck, post: 364591, member: 1246"] [FONT=Times New Roman]A PARENT'S GLOSSARY OF KIDS KITCHEN TERMS:[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]APPETIZING: Anything advertised on TV.[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]BOIL: The point a parent reaches upon hearing the automatic "Yuck" before a food is even tasted.[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]CASSEROLE: Combination of favorite foods that go uneaten because they are mixed together.[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]CHAIR: Spot left vacant by mid-meal bathroom visit.[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]COOKIE (LAST ONE): Item that must be eaten in front of a sibling.[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]CRUST: Part of a sandwich saved for the starving children of another country.[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]DESSERTS: The reason for eating a meal.[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]EVAPORATE: Magic trick performed by children when it comes time to clear the table or wash dishes.[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]FAT: Microscopic substance detected visually by children on pieces of meat they do not wish to eat.[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]FLOOR: Place for all food not found on lap or chair.[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]FORK: Eating utensil made obsolete by discovery of fingers.[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]FRIED FOODS: Gourmet cooking[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]FROZEN: Condition of children's jaws when Spinach is served.[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]FRUIT: A natural sweet not to be confused with dessert.[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]GERMS: The only thing kids will share freely.[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]KITCHEN: The only room not used when eating crumbly snacks.[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]LEFTOVERS: Commonly described as "gross."[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]LIVER: A food that affects genes, creating a hereditary dislike.[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]LOLLIPOP: A snack provided by people who don't have to pay dental bills.[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]MACARONI: Material for a collage.[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]MEASURING CUP: A kitchen utensil that is stored in the sandbox.[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]NAPKIN: Any warm cloth object, such as shirt or pants.[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]NATURAL FOOD: Food eaten with unwashed hands.[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]NUTRITION: Secret war waged by parents using direct commands, camouflage, and constant guard duty.[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]PLATE: A breakable Frisbee.[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]REFRIGERATOR: A very expensive and inefficient room air conditioner when not being used as an art gallery.[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]SALIVA: A medium for blowing bubbles.[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]SODA POP: Shake'N Spray.[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]TABLE: A place for storing gum.[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]TABLE LEG: Percussion instrument[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]THIRSTY: How your child feels after you've said your final "good night."[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]VEGETABLE: A basic food known to satisfy kid's hunger —but only by sight.[/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman]WATER: The cola of underdeveloped countries. [/FONT] [/QUOTE]
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Heard Any Good Ones: Part 2
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