Is there anything you can recommend? Security? HR? I just want him to stop

gorilla75jdw

Well-Known Member
Lets quit beating around the bush , make his name known on here , right now !! , embaress him , humiliate him , be-little him , the physchological effect will smack him in the face . Living up to the image he has reputad will finish him . Copy and Paste all documents , texts , pics. etc,etc on here until he and others in his area get an understanding of what is going on . On the other hand , have your new hubby,boyfriend knock him out , he definetly will understand that .
 

Bubblehead

My Senior Picture
Yabbut, you can't spend a dime if your former spouse kills you.

Maybe it won't go that far, but from what I have seen, no one can predict who takes it that far.

I agree, but the OP comes here wanting to know what she can do to get this guy to stop when the answers are right under her nose.
In the end, she seems more concerned about keeping the money coming in than ending the cycle.
I hopes she finds the courage to prioritize what needs to be done.
 

cheryl

I started this.
Staff member
It's incredibly easy to pass a quick judgement without understanding why someone would do or say something when you don't walk in their shoes...
 

UPSfor5

Member
No Bubblehead, that's not true. I went to court and said that if he would leave me alone, he would never have to pay another penny in support of any kind.
I actually made calls today. I believe he will be out of work soon and have all the free time in the world.
 

Bubblehead

My Senior Picture
It's incredibly easy to pass a quick judgement without understanding why someone would do or say something when you don't walk in their shoes...

Yes, it is.
But by starting this thread, that's what your going to get.
Shouldn't it be expected?
In the end the OP gets many perspectives to consider and perhaps becomes better equipped to make a good decision.
I wasn't trying to mean rather was sharing my solicited thoughts on subject.
I hope she finds a way to get closure and start a new chapter in her life.
Sounds like the wheels are in motion as we speak.
 

barnyard

KTM rider
and by posting on a public forum, anyone is going to hear from perspectives that they may not have heard before.

Maybe one from someone that knows a spouse that killed their spouse and then themselves and maybe is sick of seeing that kind of thing and would prefer not to see it again.
 

Catatonic

Nine Lives
Yes, it is.
But by starting this thread, that's what your going to get.
Shouldn't it be expected?
In the end the OP gets many perspectives to consider and perhaps becomes better equipped to make a good decision.
I wasn't trying to mean rather was sharing my solicited thoughts on subject.
I hope she finds a way to get closure and start a new chapter in her life.
Sounds like the wheels are in motion as we speak.

and by posting on a public forum, anyone is going to hear from perspectives that they may not have heard before.

Maybe one from someone that knows a spouse that killed their spouse and then themselves and maybe is sick of seeing that kind of thing and would prefer not to see it again.

I think Cheryl would agree with these posts as I certainly do.

I think she was referring to the sleazy innuendo insinuations that the OP was only interested in money.

Some people always assume the worst in others and are just mean-spirited and can never see themselves for what they are.
 

soberups

Pees in the brown Koolaid
He wears a tie, yes. He is a manager.
There is a "former" member of this forum with a similar screen name whose online persona fits the description of what both you and Cheryl described. TOS ruled probably prohibit me from mentioning that screen name, but by asking "if the Guy wore a Tie" I think anyone who has been on the forum for more than a couple of years would know who I was referencing.
 

soberups

Pees in the brown Koolaid
The sad reality of Domestic Violence is that finances often times do play a role. When the abuser is also the primary financial provider for the family, it gives him that much more control. My wife volunteers for a domestic violence shelter as an advocate and hotline operator. She has been the person who actually meets the victim and brings them and their children to the shelter when they call for help. I have also helped out a little bit by doing odd jobs around the shelter, painting and yard work etc. The horror stories we have seen are heart-rending, many of these women are forced to flee with little more than the clothes on their back and they wind up financially ruined.
 

soberups

Pees in the brown Koolaid
No Bubblehead, that's not true. I went to court and said that if he would leave me alone, he would never have to pay another penny in support of any kind.
I actually made calls today. I believe he will be out of work soon and have all the free time in the world.

Good luck to you, and bless you for standing up to the man and taking action to keep you and your family safe!!!!!
 

toonertoo

Most Awesome Dog
Staff member
I totally agree with soberups, thankfully she seems to at least be looking for a way out. You would be suprised at what it takes to get yourself out of one of these relationships. People get so beat down they think there is no up. The verbal abuse is sometimes worse than the physical, and the loss of friends who were mutual, and the yarn spins. And I 110% agree if you have never been there, I hope you never are. I am hoping she is a strong enough woman, and I think she is, to move past this. Its not that easy to "move on", and the money is a very small part. Of course if he loses his job, she loses part of the way she supports the children they had together.
I just hope she makes better decisions the next time, I know I was not smart enough to. it took me two failed relationships. One day I had a gun at my head, its not fun. Karma will come around, my once abusive husband used the same gun on himself a few yrs ago. It actually saddened me, as he had apologized, years after I moved past it. And it ripped my sons life apart. So I dont take these things lightly.
I hope she can get through this, I do not know what makes people this way. No one deserves it.
And I am glad she had somewhere to go ask for suggestions.
 

clarnzz

Well-Known Member
My opinion is I would leave UPS out of it and let the courts and law enforcement handle it. I'm sure he's an ass, and I'm not saying ur dependant on it, but I'd think you'd prefer the ******* to have a job.

I'friend not, nail em, there is no excuse for child or spousal abuse, friend his life up.
 

Catatonic

Nine Lives
My opinion is I would leave UPS out of it and let the courts and law enforcement handle it. I'm sure he's an ass, and I'm not saying ur dependant on it, but I'd think you'd prefer the ******* to have a job.

I'friend not, nail em, there is no excuse for child or spousal abuse, friend his life up.

Or as they say in poker, don 't over-extend yourself but if you do, go all in.
 
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