Personal attack versus Disagreeing with someone

Catatonic

Nine Lives
Seems to be an increase in personal attacks on others in this time of stress in the country, at UPS and on Brown Cafe.

There is a huge difference between attacking a person and disagreeing with that person's point of view.

I have personally observed management personnel at UPS lose their jobs, get demoted or lose their stock for a year for attacking other people (calling them stupid, calling them an idiot, etc.).
I've never seen anyone disciplined for disagreeing with another person's point of view.

Not that what I have observed within UPS is relevant to the Brown Cafe ...
but there are TOS for this subject for the Brown Cafe which I have posted below:

Discussion can be animated, which is fine, but we do not welcome personal attacks, on- or off-site. It is inappropriate to say anything on a discussion forum about any individual or entity that you would not be prepared to say to them face-to-face.

It is fine to disagree with a different viewpoint, but please limit this to challenging the idea and not make your comments a personal challenge or make derogatory personal comments about individuals, their ideas or their situation. The latter is considered to be a flame and will not be tolerated.

The above is from the TOS at the URL below:
http://www.browncafe.com/community/help/terms
 

DS

Fenderbender
Good post hoaxy.I admit in the past,I have made some disparaging comments towards a few members and I apologize for it.Sometimes our personel views are so strong that they often overstep that fine line between disagreement and disrespect that are defined in the TOS .Unlike most forums the bc is only lightly moderated.We depend on everyone to report something if you feel it crosses that line.
 

MechanicForBrown

Prblm found,part on order
Good post hoaxy.I admit in the past,I have made some disparaging comments towards a few members and I apologize for it.Sometimes our personel views are so strong that they often overstep that fine line between disagreement and disrespect that are defined in the TOS .Unlike most forums the bc is only lightly moderated.We depend on everyone to report something if you feel it crosses that line.
With that said, I apologize for any offense I made to anyone on th BC in a comment or private message. I will further keep my strongest opinions about any other member to my self and not in a post or thread, and last I will adhere to the rules set forth in the TOS.:peaceful:
 

soberups

Pees in the brown Koolaid
Address the post, not the poster.

A good mental excercise when responding to an individual with whom you strongly disagree...is to eliminate the word "you" from any posts you might make.
 

MC4YOU2

Wherever I see Trump, it smells like he's Putin.
I think we can all learn from one another here, and even more so if our opinions differ. The world is a mixed up place where we all try to find our way and BC is just another slice of it. If I really want to trade insults, I'll go to work. Thanks.

ps Sorry if I have offended anybody.

koom bay yah........ koom bay yah...........
 
I agree that we shouldn't call other posters names and disparage their personalities. But sometimes the conversations become debates and debates become arguments....yadda yadda yadda. Human nature to retaliate or defend your position.
In another thread I asked a (basically rhetorical) question of another poster when I typed. "Just what do you use for a brain? I'm serious, put that sales hype to the side for long enough to use you head for thinking." (BTW, I would have said this if we had been stand two feet apart) My point was that the posts of the said person had not been thought out given the text that had proceeded. My intention was not to demean the ohter poster but to get their attention to foster thought beyond a demonstated level. Following that, with a little rewording on both our parts, we found out we were basiclly on the same page, just wording it totally different. On a personal level I did not think this person to be brainless, quite the opposite actually.

I do have to ask though, what is the difference in saying a post is stupid and saying that poster is stupid? The difference is that at times everyone uses their head only to keep their ears apart.
To me the flame or personal attack, is when you say something with the only impactis for disparaging their character or personality. i.e., yo momma wears combat boots.
 

over9five

Moderator
Staff member
I'm getting a little tired of the responses that one poster gets whenever he posts.
Snide little remarks about sexuality that have absolutely nothing to do with any post. It's time for that to stop.
 

dilligaf

IN VINO VERITAS
Address the post, not the poster.

A good mental excercise when responding to an individual with whom you strongly disagree...is to eliminate the word "you" from any posts you might make.
Perfectly said, Sober. Keep it in the first person, "I".
 

tonyexpress

Whac-A-Troll Patrol
Staff member
Good idea on the thread Hoax and thanks for also sharing it in the FedEx forum!

Address the post, not the poster.
A good mental excercise when responding to an individual with whom you strongly disagree...is to eliminate the word "you" from any posts you might make.

Sobering yet simple and to the point, I like it!!

I'm getting a little tired of the responses that one poster gets whenever he posts
Snide little remarks about sexuality that have absolutely nothing to do with any post. It's time for that to stop.

And you’re in a position to do that, I agree!

You can all kiss my :censored2:!

What’s an :censored2:??:happy-very:
 
P

pickup

Guest
I'm getting a little tired of the responses that one poster gets whenever he posts.
Snide little remarks about sexuality that have absolutely nothing to do with any post. It's time for that to stop.

What about when the sexuality one is remarking about is really part and parcel of the original poster's message? Especially, when the message is just a vehicle (not a trojan horse because that would imply the agenda is hidden). for the real message. Don't worry, I've stopped commenting on that posters messages (it has been difficult) .
 
P

pickup

Guest
What’s an :censored2:??:happy-very:[/QUOTE]

An :censored2: is something that soberups found attractive the other day. An fine :censored2: is something I am seeing more of now that my driver is wearing his brown shorts. My ex fed-ex driver must have been a plumber in a previous life as his :censored2: is much too big. UPS drivers are the best . I don't know what I would do without my ups driver, in or out of his shorts.

(that's the kind of message I am talking about , I've seen the template enough I can write the way he writes)


Notice: due to terms of service, one can not make any comments about sexuality, to do so would be attacking me according to the interpretation of terms of service by the MODERATORS(ominous music)
 

sexyupsman

Well-Known Member
YOU GUYS ARE ALL A BUNCH OF JERKS! Just kidding. I realize (I assume) that I have caused some controversy over the past weeks. But we have all grown up since then and I appreciate alot of the comments and personal messages I have recieved. If I offended anyone I truly apologize to you. Even the ones that still ignore my posts I dont hold anything against you. We are all human beings and deserve respect from eachother. But I wish you would stop ignoring me thats not very nice.:peaceful:
 

sexyupsman

Well-Known Member
What’s an :censored2:??:happy-very:

An :censored2: is something that soberups found attractive the other day. An fine :censored2: is something I am seeing more of now that my driver is wearing his brown shorts. My ex fed-ex driver must have been a plumber in a previous life as his :censored2: is much too big. UPS drivers are the best . I don't know what I would do without my ups driver, in or out of his shorts.

(that's the kind of message I am talking about , I've seen the template enough I can write the way he writes)


Notice: due to terms of service, one can not make any comments about sexuality, to do so would be attacking me according to the interpretation of terms of service by the MODERATORS(ominous music)[/quote]


I must agree! Those are the cutest little brown shorts!
 
P

pickup

Guest
I must agree! Those are the cutest little brown shorts![/QUOTE]

Reply to sexyupsman:

[video=youtube;XFvHEXMxrrA]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XFvHEXMxrrA[/video]
 
Sadly Hoax, it seems to be increasing everywhere. People must be stressing something fierce. I haven't seen disrespect the likes of what I have seen lately in a coons age. Not so much here, but other boards I frequent.
 
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