St. Patrick's Day

moreluck

golden ticket member
Walking into the pub, Patick said to the bartender,
"Pour me astiff one, Sean. I just had another tiff with
the little woman."
"Oh yeah," said Sean. "And how did this one end?"
"Well I'll tell ya now when it was over," Patick replied, "herself came
to me on her hands and knees, she did."
"You don't say? Now that`s a switch! What did she say?" She said, "Come
out from under that bed, you
gutless weasel!
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moreluck

golden ticket member
A ventriloquist is telling Irish jokes in Davy Byrne's pub in Grafton Street, Dublin, when, O'Leary, an irate Irishman stands up shouting, 'You're making out we're all dumb and stupid. I oughtta punch you in the nose.'

'I'm sorry sir, I...........'

'Not you,' says O'Leary, 'I'm talking to that little fella on your knee.'
 

moreluck

golden ticket member
If a man who cannot count finds a four-leaf clover, is he lucky? ~Stanislaw J. Lec


For each petal on the shamrock
This brings a wish your way -
Good health, good luck, and happiness
For today and every day.
~Author Unknown


May your blessings outnumber
The shamrocks that grow,
And may trouble avoid you
Wherever you go.
~Irish Blessing
 

moreluck

golden ticket member
O'Gara was arrested and sent for trial for armed bank robbery.

After due deliberation, the jury foreman stood up and announced, 'Not guilty.'

'That's grand,' shouted O'Gara, 'Does that mean I get to keep the money?'
:st_patrick:
 

moreluck

golden ticket member
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Two Irish mothers, Kate and Lorna were talking about their sons.

Kate says, 'My Patrick is such a saint. He works hard, doesn't smoke, and he hasn't so much as looked at a woman in over two years.'

Lorna responds, 'Well, my Francis is a saint himself. Not only hasn't he not looked at a woman in over three years, but he hasn't touched a drop of liquor in all that time.'

'My word,' says Kate, 'You must be so proud.'

'I am,' announces Lorna, 'And when he's paroled next month, I'm going to throw him a big party
 

moreluck

golden ticket member
Two Irishmen, Patrick & Michael, were adrift in a lifeboat following a dramatic escape from a burning freighter. While rummaging through the boat's provisions, Patrick stumbled across an old lamp. Secretly hoping that a genie would appear, he rubbed the lamp vigorously To the amazement of Patrick, a genie came forth. This particular genie, however, stated that he could only deliver one wish, not the standard three. Without giving much thought to the matter, Patrick blurted out, "Make the entire ocean into Guinness Beer!" The genie clapped his hands with a deafening crash, and immediately the entire sea turned into the finest brew ever sampled by mortals. Simultaneously, the genie vanished. Only the gentle lapping of Guinness on the hull broke the stillness as the two men considered their circumstances. Michael looked disgustedly at Patrick whose wish had been granted. After a long, tension-filled moment, he spoke: "Nice going Patrick! Now we're going to have to pee in the boat!
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PT Stewie

"Big Fella"
Way to Go Mo ! kicking of the season of Green ! Will be on the AC boardwalk for the St. Pat's Parade on the 15th with 3 year old Christian to listen to the pipes and drums. His mom bought him a kelly green tam.How about some uilleannpipes to start the day.
 

moreluck

golden ticket member
For me, not Irish by birth, it takes about 2 weeks to get the 'turning green' process started. It's called getting in the mood for a righteous holiday !!

(3 years old...already??!! )
 

Inthegame

Well-Known Member
Walking into the pub, Patick said to the bartender,
"Pour me astiff one, Sean. I just had another tiff with
the little woman."
"Oh yeah," said Sean. "And how did this one end?"
"Well I'll tell ya now when it was over," Patick replied, "herself came
to me on her hands and knees, she did."
"You don't say? Now that`s a switch! What did she say?" She said, "Come
out from under that bed, you
gutless weasel!
divider.gif
Patick? Must have had his "r" stolen by some jealous Frenchman. Slainte Moreluck...
 

1BROWNWRENCH

Amatuer Malthusian
Whatever happened to green Budweiser around St.Patrick's Day? I remember it during my college days and was fortunate enough to not see it again once I had consumed it.
 

PT Stewie

"Big Fella"
My grandmother Bridget would say when asked by her children and grandchildren if she wanted to go back and visit her home ( she never became as american citizen) she would say "there was nothing there when I left and there is nothing there now" God bless her.When asked by the boarder people coming back from Canada her place of origin she responded "Where in the hell do you think I am from ! "
 
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