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Ground and Express Drivers are EXACTLY Alike!!
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<blockquote data-quote="MrFedEx" data-source="post: 1221328" data-attributes="member: 12508"><p>bbsam says so, and Fred and his minions think so too, so I guess it must be <strong>TRUE!! </strong>And since we're "equivalent", let's all start being like Ground, kind of like the old Nike campaign "Be Like Mike", except ours can be "Be Like Igor". So, from now on, please do the following:</p><p></p><p>1. Leave your vehicle running...all the time. I don't care if you're in South Central, Harlem, or East LA...keep it running.</p><p></p><p>2. Straightline everything. Ground can only do things in a continuous pattern. None of that fancy thinking and reasoning required!</p><p></p><p>3. WAD like mad. <strong>You are not capable of multiple service levels, working-in pickups, or doing anything "out of the box". </strong>Be like Igor. Unnghh!! Igor load box. Igor throw box at door. Igor get back into running truck and drive to next stop. Light cigarette, drink beer, it all be OK! Unggh..must take dump in yard because have no time to make poo-poo. Igor good...save money and time.</p><p></p><p>4. Grow that ZZ Top beard you've always wanted. Get a tattoo of Adolf Hitler on your forehead and wear your motorcycle boots with your shorts and bandana. In the summer, bring out those comfy Ground flip-flops.</p><p></p><p>5. Drive an unsafe vehicle. Bad brakes, bald tires? Who cares, as long as it runs?</p><p></p><p>6. Slow it down...way down. You don't need no stinking service levels. It gets there when it gets there.</p><p></p><p>Yep, we're just the same, Sammy.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="MrFedEx, post: 1221328, member: 12508"] bbsam says so, and Fred and his minions think so too, so I guess it must be [B]TRUE!! [/B]And since we're "equivalent", let's all start being like Ground, kind of like the old Nike campaign "Be Like Mike", except ours can be "Be Like Igor". So, from now on, please do the following: 1. Leave your vehicle running...all the time. I don't care if you're in South Central, Harlem, or East LA...keep it running. 2. Straightline everything. Ground can only do things in a continuous pattern. None of that fancy thinking and reasoning required! 3. WAD like mad. [B]You are not capable of multiple service levels, working-in pickups, or doing anything "out of the box". [/B]Be like Igor. Unnghh!! Igor load box. Igor throw box at door. Igor get back into running truck and drive to next stop. Light cigarette, drink beer, it all be OK! Unggh..must take dump in yard because have no time to make poo-poo. Igor good...save money and time. 4. Grow that ZZ Top beard you've always wanted. Get a tattoo of Adolf Hitler on your forehead and wear your motorcycle boots with your shorts and bandana. In the summer, bring out those comfy Ground flip-flops. 5. Drive an unsafe vehicle. Bad brakes, bald tires? Who cares, as long as it runs? 6. Slow it down...way down. You don't need no stinking service levels. It gets there when it gets there. Yep, we're just the same, Sammy. [/QUOTE]
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