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The Night Before Christmas in Brooklyn
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<blockquote data-quote="But Benefits Are Great!" data-source="post: 451218" data-attributes="member: 15794"><p>[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]<span style="font-size: 10px">Twas da night before Christmas, and all tru da block</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">Not a creature was stirrin, not even Ed Koch</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">Da stockins were hung, by da furnace wit care</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">In hopes that by mornin, they'd all still be dere</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">Me and dis skank was gettin ready for bed</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">I wore pajamas.....She had a paper bag for her head</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">When up on da roof I heard dis big crash</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">Thought it was burgular, I was gonna kick ass</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">I went out on da firescape, Looked up in da sky</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">And what did I see..... but Dis freakin fat guy</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">Wit a red suit and boots, Dat came up to his knees</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">In da moonlight he looked Just like Dom Deluise</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">He had a big sled Pulled by deese reindeer</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">He called one of them dancer - So I assumed he was queer</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">As he crept off the roof It became clear to me</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">Dat dis guy was looking To steal my TV</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">Over his shoulder He had a big sack</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">He came down the stairs as I planned my attack</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">I waited a second Until the time had seem ripe</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">Smacked him in da head Badda-bing wit a pipe</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">He fell to da floor Wit a groan and a tud</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">I was kinda surprised Dat I didnt see blood</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">Instead, he rolled over, looked me in da eye</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">When I seen who'd I d hit, I near started to cry</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">I said "Yo Santa ,, I'm sorry, aright?</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">Not for nuttin he said "But this ain't my night"</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">"I got lost in da Bronx, I ran over some nuns,</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">Had a near miss by Kennedy, Rudolph's got da runs"</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">I'm out all freakin night, Bustin my hump</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">But I cant continue now, Not wit dis bump</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">So do me a favor and be a real pal</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">Take over for me, and be Santa, Sal</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">I said, "Yo I'm from Brooklyn, I aint right for da part"</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">But he said bein Santa Claus comes from da heart</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">He made me an offer I couldnt refuse......</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">Stop at every house..........</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">'cept for da JEWS </span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">I got into da suit and stepped onto the sleigh</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">Wondering just why reindeer smelled dat way</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">Took off on my mission, Didnt wanna be late</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">While ol' St Nick spended the night Hosin' my date</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">Dat night I was Santa Bringin kids joy and bliss</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">And if you dont believe me......</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">Then hey, JINGLE DIS </span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">Since then I've been wit him Each year in da cold</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">Ridin shotgun wit Santa......Cause he's fat and he's old</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">I'm his number one helper, I've been deputized....</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">So on dis Christmas eve, Don't youse be surprised</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">If you hear a voice say Real loud and abrupt.....</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">Merry Christmas to all</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">Thanks alot-- Shut up!!!</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">Sal Manella</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"></span>[/FONT]</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="But Benefits Are Great!, post: 451218, member: 15794"] [FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][SIZE=2]Twas da night before Christmas, and all tru da block Not a creature was stirrin, not even Ed Koch Da stockins were hung, by da furnace wit care In hopes that by mornin, they'd all still be dere Me and dis skank was gettin ready for bed I wore pajamas.....She had a paper bag for her head When up on da roof I heard dis big crash Thought it was burgular, I was gonna kick ass I went out on da firescape, Looked up in da sky And what did I see..... but Dis freakin fat guy Wit a red suit and boots, Dat came up to his knees In da moonlight he looked Just like Dom Deluise He had a big sled Pulled by deese reindeer He called one of them dancer - So I assumed he was queer As he crept off the roof It became clear to me Dat dis guy was looking To steal my TV Over his shoulder He had a big sack He came down the stairs as I planned my attack I waited a second Until the time had seem ripe Smacked him in da head Badda-bing wit a pipe He fell to da floor Wit a groan and a tud I was kinda surprised Dat I didnt see blood Instead, he rolled over, looked me in da eye When I seen who'd I d hit, I near started to cry I said "Yo Santa ,, I'm sorry, aright? Not for nuttin he said "But this ain't my night" "I got lost in da Bronx, I ran over some nuns, Had a near miss by Kennedy, Rudolph's got da runs" I'm out all freakin night, Bustin my hump But I cant continue now, Not wit dis bump So do me a favor and be a real pal Take over for me, and be Santa, Sal I said, "Yo I'm from Brooklyn, I aint right for da part" But he said bein Santa Claus comes from da heart He made me an offer I couldnt refuse...... Stop at every house.......... 'cept for da JEWS I got into da suit and stepped onto the sleigh Wondering just why reindeer smelled dat way Took off on my mission, Didnt wanna be late While ol' St Nick spended the night Hosin' my date Dat night I was Santa Bringin kids joy and bliss And if you dont believe me...... Then hey, JINGLE DIS Since then I've been wit him Each year in da cold Ridin shotgun wit Santa......Cause he's fat and he's old I'm his number one helper, I've been deputized.... So on dis Christmas eve, Don't youse be surprised If you hear a voice say Real loud and abrupt..... Merry Christmas to all Thanks alot-- Shut up!!! Sal Manella [/SIZE][/FONT] [/QUOTE]
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