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My Brown/Cafe survey/challenge for new hires
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<blockquote data-quote="Thebrowntruth" data-source="post: 106417"><p>All,</p><p>I hate to ask but I'm gonna give this a try. We had the pleasure of 11 fine individuals come in for a second interview and building tour. We are, like so many others, short staffed and trying to hire quicker than they quit (No comments please about the pay or workload...it's out of my hands as a front liner). </p><p></p><p>As a few managers left last time we had a walk around they spoke of the challenge for front line sups to mold these people into UPSers. Then one got in his BMW and the other his Lexus and drove off into the sunset. BTW, think they had this choice of new hires 20 years ago when they were supervisors and the wage rate was almost the same!!!!!! </p><p></p><p>I will except all contributions of taped Dr. Phil episodes, English to Spanish translation dictonaries and Hooked on Phonics books you may have to assist in the molding function of my job. Please send them in care of:</p><p></p><p>The Mike & Scott Show</p><p>Atlanta, GA.</p><p></p><p>Until then, here are the candidates, who do you think i should bring aboard. And please remember they will be loading YOUR trucks and for you short timers and retirees they will be doing the workload that keeps your pension rolling in.</p><p></p><p>#1 and #2 - ah yes we start off with two physically capable guys. The downside is their records. One a convicted Pyromaniac and the other convicted and served for Aggr. Murder</p><p>Negatives - its over 90 degrees in the building now, not much use for pyro man until peak when the heat is out. </p><p>Positives - drivers not too likely to complain about eithers loading skills</p><p></p><p>#3- #5 - here we have the 3 hip hop stooges. Note to new hires...its highly unlikely that at an interview your future boss wants to see your butt or underwear unless your job involves dancing and a pole. None of their feet left the ground as they slid around the building slowly dragging along their pants.</p><p>Positives - I could let word get out that i think one of them had a nice <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/group1/censored2.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":censored2:" title="Censored2 :censored2:" data-shortname=":censored2:" /> and then demand a transfer anywhere in the country after word gets out my lifestyle might be "different".</p><p></p><p>#6 - kind of the Curly Joe to the stooges above. Apparently this "wanna be" who thought the dress code was the same for young guys of Irish decent who were coming to interviews. Again he too couldnt pick up his feet when he "rolled" around the building.</p><p></p><p>#7 and #8. A guy and lady, both in their 40's. Nice enough but if they were any heavier the NFL would be looking at future star nose tackles. Bending at knees to lift? It would be nice if they could since neither has seen their toes in a few years. Almost winded them walking around the building.</p><p>Positives - I dont look as bad in shorts as i thought</p><p></p><p>#9 - ahhhh the christmas tree kid. If he had one more ornament hanging from his pierced head i would have thrown some lights on him and had the drivers sing me a XMAS song to start off PCM. I hope no magnets come down the slides loose if he comes aboard</p><p>Positives - I love the holidays so he would always be good for a smile.</p><p></p><p>#10 - 30 something STONER. He has recovered but looks and smelled like a train wreck. More chemistry in his system than your local drug store but we dont test for part-timers so he's a keeper.</p><p>Positives - If injured at work his body wont realize it until he has been home a few hours.</p><p></p><p>#11 - average, quiet, 20 something. She is a definate</p><p>Bonus points - she speaks English!!!</p><p></p><p>So there is my dilema all. Which ones do i bring aboard? They already made it through their first HR interview so i just need to green light them. Its the first browncafe socialogy experiment. Ill keep you posted on their progress. Which numbers do you want and please let me know if you are a driver, preloader, supv, etc. </p><p></p><p>And you probably dont want to know this but we need 12 people. Who will it be that couldnt crack this group of eleven. I cant wait to see</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Thebrowntruth, post: 106417"] All, I hate to ask but I'm gonna give this a try. We had the pleasure of 11 fine individuals come in for a second interview and building tour. We are, like so many others, short staffed and trying to hire quicker than they quit (No comments please about the pay or workload...it's out of my hands as a front liner). As a few managers left last time we had a walk around they spoke of the challenge for front line sups to mold these people into UPSers. Then one got in his BMW and the other his Lexus and drove off into the sunset. BTW, think they had this choice of new hires 20 years ago when they were supervisors and the wage rate was almost the same!!!!!! I will except all contributions of taped Dr. Phil episodes, English to Spanish translation dictonaries and Hooked on Phonics books you may have to assist in the molding function of my job. Please send them in care of: The Mike & Scott Show Atlanta, GA. Until then, here are the candidates, who do you think i should bring aboard. And please remember they will be loading YOUR trucks and for you short timers and retirees they will be doing the workload that keeps your pension rolling in. #1 and #2 - ah yes we start off with two physically capable guys. The downside is their records. One a convicted Pyromaniac and the other convicted and served for Aggr. Murder Negatives - its over 90 degrees in the building now, not much use for pyro man until peak when the heat is out. Positives - drivers not too likely to complain about eithers loading skills #3- #5 - here we have the 3 hip hop stooges. Note to new hires...its highly unlikely that at an interview your future boss wants to see your butt or underwear unless your job involves dancing and a pole. None of their feet left the ground as they slid around the building slowly dragging along their pants. Positives - I could let word get out that i think one of them had a nice :censored: and then demand a transfer anywhere in the country after word gets out my lifestyle might be "different". #6 - kind of the Curly Joe to the stooges above. Apparently this "wanna be" who thought the dress code was the same for young guys of Irish decent who were coming to interviews. Again he too couldnt pick up his feet when he "rolled" around the building. #7 and #8. A guy and lady, both in their 40's. Nice enough but if they were any heavier the NFL would be looking at future star nose tackles. Bending at knees to lift? It would be nice if they could since neither has seen their toes in a few years. Almost winded them walking around the building. Positives - I dont look as bad in shorts as i thought #9 - ahhhh the christmas tree kid. If he had one more ornament hanging from his pierced head i would have thrown some lights on him and had the drivers sing me a XMAS song to start off PCM. I hope no magnets come down the slides loose if he comes aboard Positives - I love the holidays so he would always be good for a smile. #10 - 30 something STONER. He has recovered but looks and smelled like a train wreck. More chemistry in his system than your local drug store but we dont test for part-timers so he's a keeper. Positives - If injured at work his body wont realize it until he has been home a few hours. #11 - average, quiet, 20 something. She is a definate Bonus points - she speaks English!!! So there is my dilema all. Which ones do i bring aboard? They already made it through their first HR interview so i just need to green light them. Its the first browncafe socialogy experiment. Ill keep you posted on their progress. Which numbers do you want and please let me know if you are a driver, preloader, supv, etc. And you probably dont want to know this but we need 12 people. Who will it be that couldnt crack this group of eleven. I cant wait to see [/QUOTE]
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