My name is Grajeeb and I want to tell you about my SFA doughnut and how wonderful FedEx is for me! In my home country of Azcrakistan, a doughnut is a very special thing, served only on Victory Day, when we celebrate the destruction of our neighboring land, Buttphukistan. We have but only one doughnut, which we decorate in the colors of our flag, and then slice it into tiny sections so everyone gets a piece. If we have some, we sprinkle dried donkey dung on top for extra special luck and to ensure the death of all enemies of Azcrakistan. Can you imagine my happiness when my FedEx manager brought in a whole box of doughnuts, FOR THREE DAYS?!!! I so excited, I wet pants, and then have 4-hour erection like Viagra! Doughnuts, doughnuts, doughnuts!! I so happy I call home and tell family how wonderful FedEx is to me! Anyway, to repay my manager and this special company I give great scores of SFA, which is special document that tells workers how FedEx Cares about them. Kind of like Azcrakistan Constitution guaranteeing everyone and their donkey freedom and prosperity. I also come in on weekends and wash my truck for free, and work every lunch hour in gratitude for the huge amounts of money I am paid for this job! Back home, when I mine coal, I make 50 lupniks per day, which is about same as $5 per hour USA. I am rich! God bless Mr. Smith and this great company. Only someone who cares a great deal would understand the immense power of a doughnut. Death to Buttphukistan and long live Fred Smith!