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<blockquote data-quote="Old Man Jingles" data-source="post: 4107259" data-attributes="member: 18222"><p><strong><a href="https://local.theonion.com/man-remembers-it-summer-solstice-after-noticing-group-o-1835738374" target="_blank"><span style="font-size: 18px">Man Remembers It Summer Solstice After Noticing Group Of Pagans <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/group1/censored2.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":censored2:" title="Censored2 :censored2:" data-shortname=":censored2:" />ing In Ring Of Fire</span></a></strong></p><p>TULSA, OK—Saying he had almost completely forgotten the longest day of the year was approaching, local resident Phil Garrison suddenly remembered it was the summer solstice Friday after noticing a group of pagans <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/group1/censored2.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":censored2:" title="Censored2 :censored2:" data-shortname=":censored2:" />ing in a ring of fire while walking to work. “Honestly, I hadn’t even thought about the midsummer until I smelled the scent of rendered goat fat in the air and saw a bunch of worshippers writhing around a bonfire in a feast of flesh,” said Garrison, ...</p><p>At press time, a naked Garrison was spotted throwing his clothes into the flames and approaching the pagans to offer them some of his semen for the upcoming fertility rites.</p><p></p><p><img src="https://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--bwOd2bd---/c_scale,f_auto,fl_progressive,q_80,w_800/ccslsxflwwipluqg60cu.jpg" alt="" class="fr-fic fr-dii fr-draggable " style="" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Old Man Jingles, post: 4107259, member: 18222"] [B][URL='https://local.theonion.com/man-remembers-it-summer-solstice-after-noticing-group-o-1835738374'][SIZE=5]Man Remembers It Summer Solstice After Noticing Group Of Pagans :censored:ing In Ring Of Fire[/SIZE][/URL][/B] TULSA, OK—Saying he had almost completely forgotten the longest day of the year was approaching, local resident Phil Garrison suddenly remembered it was the summer solstice Friday after noticing a group of pagans :censored:ing in a ring of fire while walking to work. “Honestly, I hadn’t even thought about the midsummer until I smelled the scent of rendered goat fat in the air and saw a bunch of worshippers writhing around a bonfire in a feast of flesh,” said Garrison, ... At press time, a naked Garrison was spotted throwing his clothes into the flames and approaching the pagans to offer them some of his semen for the upcoming fertility rites. [IMG]https://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--bwOd2bd---/c_scale,f_auto,fl_progressive,q_80,w_800/ccslsxflwwipluqg60cu.jpg[/IMG] [/QUOTE]
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