There was a woman whom I loved very dear,
Such that heaven was almost near.
I screwed it all up,
because I'm a maroon, yup.
What to do now,
A case of beer I might allow.
When you read this aloud,
you might say "He's already plowed.",
but you would be wrong,
this is just my swan song.
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God bless,
I work at UPS.
I am a master at chess,
complete with skill and finesse.
Challenge me I dare you,
and I will show you my kung fu.
But I digress,
because I still work at UPS.
I arrive in full dress,
my shirt having been dryed on permanent press.
My true feelings I repress,
and who really gives a crap about egress?
Grateful feelings I possess,
with a sweet mix of stress.
My managers ego I do caress,
as that is the sure road to success.
God bless,
I work at UPS.