I know this SORT OF doesn't belong here.

[PTSUP0438]

So I am trying to get some advice here, please don't be a total ass in your response, I'm just looking for some UPS perspective. I am in no way shape or form trying to get any kind of sympathy, just opinion.

About a year and a half ago my wife and I were going through a nasty separation, which included me having our children DNA tested. Come to find out one of my kids wasn't mine. I was literally living in my car as the wife kicked me out and things weren't going so well. I took out most of my anger and depression on the hourly's working for me. In a rather short period of time I had a pile of grievances as tall as I was. I had to fight for my job in a labor meeting with one of the business agents and everyone, one by one, who had filled a grievance on me. I was then on labeled a "harasser." Anytime someone had an issue with me they would file a grievance. It didn't matter the validity of the issue I was always in the wrong. I continued to have issues with one full-time preloader and eventually my manager sent me to another area to work. In the few months I was there I only had one issue with another employee which I "was very disrespectful to." I ended up having to do a write up and apologizing. I am in no way shape or form a stellar employee but I honestly feel that I have gotten the blunt end of the stick here lately.

We had a seasonal hire come on and work for two weeks before walking off the job. When HR called him he said that I "treated him like a dog." I admitted I might have disrespected him given his perception of the situation. Today I found myself in HR with my manager, the division HR manager, and one of the PT HR Supervisors. I was basically interrogated about how I was a complete piece of crap and how I was a liar and I might loose my job etc etc. They kept trying to get me to admit to all sorts of stuff by asking the same question a bunch of different times. The PT HR lady was writing down whatever I said whenever it was incriminating.

I was told that before I left work tomorrow I needed to do a write up on myself on everything I have done wrong since I have been there and basically do a write up on how I was a total piece of crap more or less.

The first year and a half I was there I was a stellar PT sup. I didn't have issues with anyone and I really loved my job. My wife and I ended up getting back together but our home life is very "crappy." Just a few weeks ago she shattered a corel plate over my face and I had to get 24 stitches, along with her getting arrested for domestic violence twice. I bring a lot of my issues to work and as soon as the hourlys see me down they always take advantage of it. I suffer from severe depression and anxiety disorder on top of all that.


I guess my real question is that given my lengthy history of employee issues and already getting moved once and how they want me to do this write up etc. Am I going to get fired? Is this write up supposed to be my death wish or what? Given everything that's happened and the few times I have been taken to HR and gotten in trouble I have only done one actual write up on myself with my employee issues. Our HR manager said he was going on vacation next week and when he got back he would decide if I was keeping my job or not. I KNOW I have issues with my mouth and taking my personal stressors out at work but I don't know if I should even do this write up or just cut my losses and look for another job? I feel like I'm getting the big steam roller here.

Thanks to anyone with some input.

 

[ajblakejr]

Be honest, like your post, consider your post the first step to mental health. You have been trained on EAP benefits, now use them yourself. Go to UPSers.com and continue on this difficult path.... This post is a start... Blessings to you...AJ

 

[j13501]

I guess my real question is that given my lengthy history of employee issues and already getting moved once and how they want me to do this write up etc. Am I going to get fired? Is this write up supposed to be my death wish or what? Given everything that's happened and the few times I have been taken to HR and gotten in trouble I have only done one actual write up on myself with my employee issues. Our HR manager said he was going on vacation next week and when he got back he would decide if I was keeping my job or not. I KNOW I have issues with my mouth and taking my personal stressors out at work but I don't know if I should even do this write up or just cut my losses and look for another job? I feel like I'm getting the big steam roller here. Thanks to anyone with some input.

I'm sorry you've had very stressful personal problems in your life. UPS management in a tough job, and family issues at home can make it tougher.

However, the true answer to your question is that you should probably start looking for a new job. I've seen times when a supervisor had conficts with a number of employees, and got through it fine; because they had no prior record of harrassing behavior and it was obvious that the labor climate in that building was combative. You have stated that you've been taking out the personal stress on employees at work. You said that "Anytime someone had an issue with me they would file a grievance. It didn't matter the validity of the issue I was always in the wrong" This kind of "piling on" does take place, and it's unfair, but unfortunately, your past poor behavior makes it difficut to defend you. UPS is not going to tolerate that kind of behavior.

I'm not sure why you feel that you're getting "the steam roller"? You admit you've been causing problems and have been given chances in the past. My suggestion is to do the write-up, keep your mouth shut and look for a job. I'm sure with your supervisory experience, you won't have a problem getting a job, and it will give you a fresh start.
This was not what you wanted to hear, but I'd be misleading you if I said anything different. Good luck.

 

[cachsux]

I`ll give you credit for just admitting you had problems that affected you at work. You`re 75% ahead of most sups I`ve ever worked for.

 

[toonertoo]

I`ll give you credit for just admitting you had problems that affected you at work. You`re 75% ahead of most sups I`ve ever worked for.

75% ahead of most people who work.

 

[Fenris]

So I am trying to get some advice here, please don't be a total ass in your response, I'm just looking for some UPS perspective. I am in no way shape or form trying to get any kind of sympathy, just opinion.

About a year and a half ago my wife and I were going through a nasty separation, which included me having our children DNA tested. Come to find out one of my kids wasn't mine. I was literally living in my car as the wife kicked me out and things weren't going so well. I took out most of my anger and depression on the hourly's working for me. In a rather short period of time I had a pile of grievances as tall as I was. I had to fight for my job in a labor meeting with one of the business agents and everyone, one by one, who had filled a grievance on me. I was then on labeled a "harasser." Anytime someone had an issue with me they would file a grievance. It didn't matter the validity of the issue I was always in the wrong. I continued to have issues with one full-time preloader and eventually my manager sent me to another area to work. In the few months I was there I only had one issue with another employee which I "was very disrespectful to." I ended up having to do a write up and apologizing. I am in no way shape or form a stellar employee but I honestly feel that I have gotten the blunt end of the stick here lately.

We had a seasonal hire come on and work for two weeks before walking off the job. When HR called him he said that I "treated him like a dog." I admitted I might have disrespected him given his perception of the situation. Today I found myself in HR with my manager, the division HR manager, and one of the PT HR Supervisors. I was basically interrogated about how I was a complete piece of crap and how I was a liar and I might loose my job etc etc. They kept trying to get me to admit to all sorts of stuff by asking the same question a bunch of different times. The PT HR lady was writing down whatever I said whenever it was incriminating.

I was told that before I left work tomorrow I needed to do a write up on myself on everything I have done wrong since I have been there and basically do a write up on how I was a total piece of crap more or less.

The first year and a half I was there I was a stellar PT sup. I didn't have issues with anyone and I really loved my job. My wife and I ended up getting back together but our home life is very "crappy." Just a few weeks ago she shattered a corel plate over my face and I had to get 24 stitches, along with her getting arrested for domestic violence twice. I bring a lot of my issues to work and as soon as the hourlys see me down they always take advantage of it. I suffer from severe depression and anxiety disorder on top of all that.


I guess my real question is that given my lengthy history of employee issues and already getting moved once and how they want me to do this write up etc. Am I going to get fired? Is this write up supposed to be my death wish or what? Given everything that's happened and the few times I have been taken to HR and gotten in trouble I have only done one actual write up on myself with my employee issues. Our HR manager said he was going on vacation next week and when he got back he would decide if I was keeping my job or not. I KNOW I have issues with my mouth and taking my personal stressors out at work but I don't know if I should even do this write up or just cut my losses and look for another job? I feel like I'm getting the big steam roller here.

Thanks to anyone with some input.

PTSUP0438,

HR has an obligation to protect the company. If they are going to decide to keep you on it is only going to be because they believe you recognize you have a problem, are willing to address it and have taken the effort to come up with some concrete steps to do so. That is what they are looking for in a write-up, not how you are a 'piece of crap'. If you are serious about keeping the job, ajblakejr may have the right idea. You need to learn how to better respond to your triggers and if you show that you are willing to do so it would look better in the eyes of HR.

 

[menotyou]

We have a supervisor like you. Except, she is number #1 in the district for discipline. That is why they leave her alone. I am glad to see you admit you were wrong and you want to change. Do you want to change to keep your job, or do you want to change because they are making you? That is what I need to know before helping you.

 

[UpstateNYUPSer(Ret)]

I`ll give you credit for just admitting you had problems that affected you at work. You`re 75% ahead of most sups I`ve ever worked for.

...and hourlies we have all worked with.

 

[PTSUP0438]

I want to get better for me not because they are making me. I feel incredibly alone. Today I turned in my write up explaining what problems I have and how I want to get better and be successful at ups. I laid out a plan and asked human resources to helpme. I guess I will see what happens in a week.

 

[UpstateNYUPSer(Ret)]

The first step towards a solution is recognizing the problem, which you have done. I wish you well as you work toward the solution. Dave.

 

[over9five]

I think you should request a transfer to another building and make a new start. I don't think you can recover staying in a building where everyone knows your issues.

 

[UnconTROLLed]

My opinion: medical leave and figure out your demons. Your problems from UPS are not from UPS.

 

[grgrcr88]

So I am trying to get some advice here, please don't be a total ass in your response, I'm just looking for some UPS perspective. I am in no way shape or form trying to get any kind of sympathy, just opinion.

About a year and a half ago my wife and I were going through a nasty separation, which included me having our children DNA tested. Come to find out one of my kids wasn't mine. I was literally living in my car as the wife kicked me out and things weren't going so well. I took out most of my anger and depression on the hourly's working for me. In a rather short period of time I had a pile of grievances as tall as I was. I had to fight for my job in a labor meeting with one of the business agents and everyone, one by one, who had filled a grievance on me. I was then on labeled a "harasser." Anytime someone had an issue with me they would file a grievance. It didn't matter the validity of the issue I was always in the wrong. I continued to have issues with one full-time preloader and eventually my manager sent me to another area to work. In the few months I was there I only had one issue with another employee which I "was very disrespectful to." I ended up having to do a write up and apologizing. I am in no way shape or form a stellar employee but I honestly feel that I have gotten the blunt end of the stick here lately.

We had a seasonal hire come on and work for two weeks before walking off the job. When HR called him he said that I "treated him like a dog." I admitted I might have disrespected him given his perception of the situation. Today I found myself in HR with my manager, the division HR manager, and one of the PT HR Supervisors. I was basically interrogated about how I was a complete piece of crap and how I was a liar and I might loose my job etc etc. They kept trying to get me to admit to all sorts of stuff by asking the same question a bunch of different times. The PT HR lady was writing down whatever I said whenever it was incriminating.

I was told that before I left work tomorrow I needed to do a write up on myself on everything I have done wrong since I have been there and basically do a write up on how I was a total piece of crap more or less.

The first year and a half I was there I was a stellar PT sup. I didn't have issues with anyone and I really loved my job. My wife and I ended up getting back together but our home life is very "crappy." Just a few weeks ago she shattered a corel plate over my face and I had to get 24 stitches, along with her getting arrested for domestic violence twice. I bring a lot of my issues to work and as soon as the hourlys see me down they always take advantage of it. I suffer from severe depression and anxiety disorder on top of all that.


I guess my real question is that given my lengthy history of employee issues and already getting moved once and how they want me to do this write up etc. Am I going to get fired? Is this write up supposed to be my death wish or what? Given everything that's happened and the few times I have been taken to HR and gotten in trouble I have only done one actual write up on myself with my employee issues. Our HR manager said he was going on vacation next week and when he got back he would decide if I was keeping my job or not. I KNOW I have issues with my mouth and taking my personal stressors out at work but I don't know if I should even do this write up or just cut my losses and look for another job? I feel like I'm getting the big steam roller here.

Thanks to anyone with some input.

Step back a second and look at your actions from an hourlies point of view. The stress and mistreatment you are now feeling is the same thing you have been doing to your employees. Do you think you deserve to keep your job? I would say if you are lucky enough to keep the job you had probably better get your real problems straghtened out and soon. You will not get another chance.

 

[Integrity]

I want to get better for me not because they are making me. I feel incredibly alone. Today I turned in my write up explaining what problems I have and how I want to get better and be successful at ups. I laid out a plan and asked human resources to helpme. I guess I will see what happens in a week.

PTSUP0438,

You are not alone!

All have sinned but many have not admitted it.

You have admitted you need help.

I am so proud of you, I don't know you but I suspect there are many suffering like you working for UPS.

The verses of the song speak about a girl but the chorus and the bridge speaks to all.

You are more than the choices that you've made, you are more than the sum of your past mistakes...

[video=youtube;tq8Q675JPns]http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=tq8Q675JPns[/video]

Sincerely,
I

 

[dillweed]

Wow, I very much respect your honesty. Also am sorry you're personal life has been so rough. Life has a way of kicking us when we're already down and UPS can be especially good at this.

Taking advantage of the available resources through UPS may be the best route. You're depressed and caught in a cycle of self-damaging behavior. I hope your management team will recognize that you want and need some help with your situation and offer some support.

Some personal and marriage counseling might help, as well as some time off work? Take all they can offer and give it your all. Even if the job and/or marriage don't work out you may well benefit from something a counselor suggests.

Don't kick yourself too hard. Know for a fact that you are a very decent human being who has been bombarded with difficult situations. UPS sups have near-impossible jobs at best. Marriage can be another tough job.

I wish you the very best. Just please don't give up on yourself. Take it as it comes and handle it as best you can.

 

[dillweed]

I also want to add that the replies here show the decency of people on this forum and why I continue to participate. It would have been easy to trash the OP but it wasn't done. For all the criticism of our supervisors we seem to realize that they are also at the mercy of the "machine" and are, for the most part, good people.

Thanks to Cheryl for creating and maintaining the atmosphere that makes it all possible. This forum has helped me make it through many years of workplace turmoil. It helps me realize that it isn't just me, we all experience the same frustrations. OK, soft, warm cuddle time over - but thanks to all.

 

[bigbrownhen]

UPS tends to add to the stresses of normal life. The fact that you admit your part in creating more stress is a good start. Once you are on the back side of this situation, you will be a better supervisor. You know first had what it feels like to have your job threatened. Hourlys deal with this frequently, sometimes by our own creation, sometimes not.
I also suggest you and your family get counciling. Both for you and your kids sake. As the saying goes, "This too shall pass." Focus on the issues at hand, but also keep your eye on the future. Even if it's not working for UPS, you may find yourself happier in the long run. Best of luck to you. Hope it all works out well.

 

[PTSUP0438]

Thank you all for your support and comments, I have contacted EAP and looked into short-term disability in the mean time. This next week of not knowing if I will still have a job come the 11th of July will be tough. I hope HR and my management team will be willing to work with me and not be ready to throw in the towel. I will keep this thread updated as the week goes on as I'm sure everyone is curious about the possible outcomes. Thanks again everyone you all have been a great help.

 

[Catatonic]

I also want to add that the replies here show the decency of people on this forum and why I continue to participate. It would have been easy to trash the OP but it wasn't done. For all the criticism of our supervisors we seem to realize that they are also at the mercy of the "machine" and are, for the most part, good people.

Thanks to Cheryl for creating and maintaining the atmosphere that makes it all possible. This forum has helped me make it through many years of workplace turmoil. It helps me realize that it isn't just me, we all experience the same frustrations. OK, soft, warm cuddle time over - but thanks to all.

I was thinking the same thing yesterday ... a pleasant surprise.

 

[PTSUP0438]

Long time no update. Well, I still have no answer. I went back to work for one day then I was told I had to meet with Human Resources, the day of the meeting they cancelled on me and told me to stay home. The next day which was a Friday I had a discretionary day and was told to take it even though they didn't pay me for it. I proceeded to go on my week of vacation which was last week and came into work today and was told after I got not even 200 feet in the building that I couldn't work and someone from HR would be there in two hours to meet with me. I waited in my car and came back in the building only to be told they didn't have any answers and to come back tomorrow for a meeting in the middle of the morning with the human resources manager. The whole time nobody will tell me what this meeting is about. They haven't taken my ID and my boss doesn't even know or says he doesn't know whats going on, he just told me "its out of my hands." My FT Sup did tell me that it had something to do with clearing me to work for whatever reason, maybe the mental health issues? I did admit myself to the hospital one of the days I was out when they wouldn't let me work and I think it really freaked them out. The positive note is I am fully back on medication and back in therapy with my therapist and my psychiatrist. I guess we will see what happens tomorrow. I am thinking termination? I just don't understand why they have been going back and forth making me come in then sent home or telling me to stay home, then letting me take vacation. Nothing makes any sense...