raceanoncr
Well-Known Member
My case? Yes, ONLY my case:
Got married when barely 20 (too young, yes). Had job I loved, she hated (night job, 11-7). I said, "Why don't you get something in daytime to occupy your time and help A LITTLE". She: "No can do".
Went away for couple years. She hated that. "Maybe get a p/t job to help out in the meantime?" "No can do".
Started a cleaning business. Yep, you guessed it...at night. She hated it. "You wanna help me?" "No can do".
Started driving truck, eventually heavy equipment. AHH...DAYS!!! Yes, but 12 or more-hour days and always 6, sometimes 7 days a week. She hated that. Made tons o money during summer but laid off in winter. She spent it all. "Uh, maybe you can get a small job to help out during winter?" "No can do."
Started UPS. AHHH...DAYS again. No. LONG days. No good. THEN, started feeders. You know what THAT means. Yes, back to nights. I was happy. She, of course HATED it.
All this time, I was getting more attention "outside" the home. My fault? Of course! I LET myself get more attention.
Cut to the chase: I left, after (I think) 27 years. Never been happier. Got a wife (of 11 yrs) that's a working machine. If not at her job, then here. Never sits down. Doesn't complain about a thing.
After paying off all the exes debts (in the decree) we now live debt free.
In short, was it my fault? Well, yes. I accept some blame. But I think I always provided. She never had to worry about anything...except the next thing to complain about. I remember one time I came home. She was bawling hysterically. Me: "WTF is your problem THIS TIME?" Well, what I ACTUALLY said was, "What's the matter, dear?" She: "I have to have this VERY, VERY, VERY, VERY, VERY serious operation. I could DIE!". Me: "If only you would!". Well, what I actually said was, "Really, what is it, dear?" She: "I have to have my Gall Bladder out!". Biting my tongue to keep from laughing, I queried, "What did the DR say?" She: "Well, I haven't been to a DR but I just KNOW that's what it is". That's been about 35 yrs ago and to this day...she still has her Gall Bladder.
She always accused me of going to leave her for somebody younger. She married (what a fool!) a store clerk, 15 years her junior. Go figger.
He has to wheel her around in a chair. Why? Nothing. She's just morbidly obese now (I mean, MORBIDLY), and FINALLY has a disease she can be proud of: DIABETES, which, in her case, is debilitating. They've declared bankruptcy once and are close to living in a shelter now. "So, how's that bitching about night work going NOW!"
So, again, was it MY fault? I look at it like this:
Yes, I DID get married for an eternity. And, by golly, I LIVED an eternity with her. Were my vows sacred? Well, at the time but I guess I lied. Plain and simple, I lied. Did SHE lived up to her vows? Just by what I said here today, do you think so?
Chastise me all you want for what I did or think but if I had to stay there, I STILL wouldn't be THERE. I'd be in prison right now.
What UPS the cause of this? Hmpf! By itself, NO. Was UPS a contributing factor? Yes, But, like I said, I'd probably be in prison now for doing something far worse.
Got married when barely 20 (too young, yes). Had job I loved, she hated (night job, 11-7). I said, "Why don't you get something in daytime to occupy your time and help A LITTLE". She: "No can do".
Went away for couple years. She hated that. "Maybe get a p/t job to help out in the meantime?" "No can do".
Started a cleaning business. Yep, you guessed it...at night. She hated it. "You wanna help me?" "No can do".
Started driving truck, eventually heavy equipment. AHH...DAYS!!! Yes, but 12 or more-hour days and always 6, sometimes 7 days a week. She hated that. Made tons o money during summer but laid off in winter. She spent it all. "Uh, maybe you can get a small job to help out during winter?" "No can do."
Started UPS. AHHH...DAYS again. No. LONG days. No good. THEN, started feeders. You know what THAT means. Yes, back to nights. I was happy. She, of course HATED it.
All this time, I was getting more attention "outside" the home. My fault? Of course! I LET myself get more attention.
Cut to the chase: I left, after (I think) 27 years. Never been happier. Got a wife (of 11 yrs) that's a working machine. If not at her job, then here. Never sits down. Doesn't complain about a thing.
After paying off all the exes debts (in the decree) we now live debt free.
In short, was it my fault? Well, yes. I accept some blame. But I think I always provided. She never had to worry about anything...except the next thing to complain about. I remember one time I came home. She was bawling hysterically. Me: "WTF is your problem THIS TIME?" Well, what I ACTUALLY said was, "What's the matter, dear?" She: "I have to have this VERY, VERY, VERY, VERY, VERY serious operation. I could DIE!". Me: "If only you would!". Well, what I actually said was, "Really, what is it, dear?" She: "I have to have my Gall Bladder out!". Biting my tongue to keep from laughing, I queried, "What did the DR say?" She: "Well, I haven't been to a DR but I just KNOW that's what it is". That's been about 35 yrs ago and to this day...she still has her Gall Bladder.
She always accused me of going to leave her for somebody younger. She married (what a fool!) a store clerk, 15 years her junior. Go figger.
He has to wheel her around in a chair. Why? Nothing. She's just morbidly obese now (I mean, MORBIDLY), and FINALLY has a disease she can be proud of: DIABETES, which, in her case, is debilitating. They've declared bankruptcy once and are close to living in a shelter now. "So, how's that bitching about night work going NOW!"
So, again, was it MY fault? I look at it like this:
Yes, I DID get married for an eternity. And, by golly, I LIVED an eternity with her. Were my vows sacred? Well, at the time but I guess I lied. Plain and simple, I lied. Did SHE lived up to her vows? Just by what I said here today, do you think so?
Chastise me all you want for what I did or think but if I had to stay there, I STILL wouldn't be THERE. I'd be in prison right now.
What UPS the cause of this? Hmpf! By itself, NO. Was UPS a contributing factor? Yes, But, like I said, I'd probably be in prison now for doing something far worse.
oldngray
nowhere special
Meat Loaf ~ Paradise By The Dashboard Light - YouTube
"praying for the end of time .. so I can end my time with you?"
"praying for the end of time .. so I can end my time with you?"
Dizzee
ɹǝqɯǝɯ ɹoıuǝs
Worked with a guy who was married. Wife wanted implants. He saved up and bought her some top of the line boobs. As soon as she recovered she filed for divorce. About a year later, he has a girlfriend who talks him into buying her some implants. As soon as she recovers from the procedure, she dumps him. I keep telling him he needs to get women to sign a pre-nip. He doesn't think it's funny...
Notretiredyet
Well-Known Member
Unfortunately, sometimes the truth hurts.
moreluck
golden ticket member
Pre-nip is a riot and a half !!
When you do a pre-nup, you are planning to get divorced - not married. You are already planning for your marriage to fail.
Don't bother, stay single.
A
anonymous6
Guest
the number one cause of divorce is money issues. I did not think that would be an issue with most FT Upsers.
you have to look deep down inside for the good person that they are and find love in that. 
What'dyabringmetoday???
Well-Known Member
I have heard that it is caused by coming home and whining about the job then logging onto BrownCafe and whining to everyone else about it.
stevetheupsguy
sʇǝʌǝʇɥǝndsƃnʎ
Depressing topic really...the only common ground on here is no ones divorce or marriage is the same. I don't fault you for this divorce because it takes two to make it work and only one of ya tried. She obviously broke her vow and you stand on solid ground for yours bud...but there's a lot of people that don't give it an honest shot like you did for 27 years. The saddest thing about your ex is she probably still blames you for her current predicament.
I agree that ups doesn't care if people have ahome life.or a happy home life.i have been married going on 43 years.
A
anonymous6
Guest
it's not UPS's responsibility to care about your home life but it is their responsibility to OBEY the contract, state , and Federal LAWS or else suffer the consequences.
raceanoncr
Well-Known Member
Boy, did you hit THAT one correct! More than 20 yrs later and my son hears how bad I am every time he goes over there. He doesn't want to go over anymore.
Also funny, some years ago, when my mom was still alive, the exes current "caretaker" was bitching to her about my ex, his current. His exact words to my mom were, "Now I see why Race divorced her". My mom must have told her because she got wind of it somehow and, I guess, it was WWIII over there for a long time.
UPS Lifer
Well-Known Member
41 years and counting AND both of us were young-uns when we made the commitment. It is not my place to judge your marriage(s). But I do think that MY marriage is about communication, respect and commitment. OH! and you gotta throw a lot of arguing and fighting in there too!
Both my sons have said they will NEVER get married. One found true love at 36 and is going to be married shortly and mom and dad couldn't be happier for him.
If I had it to do all over again I would not hesitate to marry my wife....maybe sooner.
Both my sons have said they will NEVER get married. One found true love at 36 and is going to be married shortly and mom and dad couldn't be happier for him.
If I had it to do all over again I would not hesitate to marry my wife....maybe sooner.
Re-Raise
Well-Known Member
I got lucky. My wife is my partner and my best friend. We have been married 26 years.
We don't agree on everything..most of her crazy ideas I blame on HGTV. But we have learned to compromise. I would never cheat on her because she trusts me. I would never betray that trust.
It helps that I still think she is the hottest little piece on my route and I never let her forget it.
We don't agree on everything..most of her crazy ideas I blame on HGTV. But we have learned to compromise. I would never cheat on her because she trusts me. I would never betray that trust.
It helps that I still think she is the hottest little piece on my route and I never let her forget it.
Brownslave688
You want a toe? I can get you a toe.
Is your route a retirement community?
No he is just a good guy...take a page from his book!!!
Similar threads
