The perfect solution to the problem of peeing in a bottle.

Discussion in 'UPS Discussions' started by soberups, Mar 24, 2010.

  1. soberups

    soberups Pees in the brown Koolaid

    So I have noticed that in all of the newer package cars there is an access plate to the fuel tank in the floor under shelf 1 that is held down with 4 screws. (see photo below).

    Instead of expecting us to pee in bottles in order to avoid breaking trace to drive to a restroom...Automotive needs to install spring-loaded hinges on this plate it to allow the driver to flip it open and use it as a urinal.

    Its the perfect solution; no mess, no spilling, no leaky bottles to empty out or deal with. Just flip up the cover, pee, and drive away....leaving nothing behind but a puddle on the ground.

    Imagine the increase in SPORH that will be possible by allowing the driver to multitask and urinate at the same time he is moving his next 10 stops up into the 30-60" shelf 1 preselection area per the 340 methods. Instead of having to waste time sorting with one hand while holding a bottle in the other, he will be free to sort with both hands...provided that his aim is good.

    This could work for the ladies too; simply remove the cardboard tube from the inside of a roll of DR bags and Voila...a handy aiming spout that can be employed from within the complete privacy of the package compartment. You wont be able to sort your next few stops like the guys will, of course, but I am quite sure that I.E. will grant an additional time allowance to the female drivers in the interest of equality.

    Lets hope that Automotive and I.E can see the obvious wisdom of my idea and begin the necessary modifications as soon as possible!
    package car..jpg
  2. robot

    robot Large Member

    Or they can issue adult diapers! Imagine the SPORH numbers!
  3. dilligaf

    dilligaf IN VINO VERITAS

    LOL Sober! There is only one fatal flaw in your plan. The mechanics would never allow it because they have to work on those fuel tanks.:surprised:

    Robot, you know what diapers and dispatchers have in common, don't you? They are both full of ****** and all over your A**. Thanks but no thanks. I have to put up with dispatch.....................:wink2:
  4. JustTired

    JustTired free at last.......

    Geeeeeeez............I know you're joking. But, I envision someone in IE (after having read that) running the numbers right this minute. I'd be keeping my fingers crossed (or maybe legs) that the numbers don't pan out.
  5. ups79

    ups79 Active Member

    Only functional near the end of the day and before pickups, unless you go out with an empty package car.
  6. outta hours

    outta hours Active Member

  7. UpstateNYUPSer

    UpstateNYUPSer Very proud grandfather.

  8. over9five

    over9five Senior Member Staff Member

    Where do you wash your hands afterward?

    I've never had a problem breaking route to use an actual bathroom with a sink and paper towels. Those of you who pee in bottles in the back of a truck, please tell your customers this when you hand them their package and the DIAD. Yuck.
  9. Tony31yrs

    Tony31yrs New Member

    When I retired 4 years ago, they were firing guys who had a "pee-bottle" in their cars. The mechanics were complaining about biological hazards and wouldn't work on the vehicles that they found them in. This all started because some "runners" didn't have the time to empty or throw out the bottle or cup afterwards.
    On a lighter note, one driver took a Pepsi bottle and left it on the car filled with cider. The next morning, the center manager called him in with the steward and started to ream him about it. He calmly walked over and drank it. The center manager gave him a one day suspension. I told him to grieve it and he said, "That's ok, I needed a day off anyway"!
  10. trplnkl

    trplnkl 555

    Now that right there is funny...thanks for the laugh.
  11. UpstateNYUPSer

    UpstateNYUPSer Very proud grandfather.

    Now that right there is stupid...I am glad I don't work with that driver.
  12. trplnkl

    trplnkl 555

    Why do you say that? Please explain.
  13. over9five

    over9five Senior Member Staff Member

    I would have to agree.

    What exactly was the suspension for???
  14. grgrcr88

    grgrcr88 No It's not green grocer!

    I'm with over on this one. I have yet to see anyone disciplined for going off trace to use the restroom, If they are, I would think they would have a lawsuit on their hands
  15. UpstateNYUPSer

    UpstateNYUPSer Very proud grandfather.

    I think I'd have rather have (a) lawsuit than urine on my hands.
  16. dilligaf

    dilligaf IN VINO VERITAS

    For being a smartass!?!?!?!?!?!:surprised:

    PS, I thought it was hilarious.
  17. dilligaf

    dilligaf IN VINO VERITAS

    Trp, you'll never get an answer. Aren't you glad you don't have to work with that driver? :wink2:
  18. Tony31yrs

    Tony31yrs New Member

    I said the same thing. He didn't do anything wrong, but the center manager was kind of a db at times and the driver actually was a cover driver that couldn't get a day off and needed one. I guess he just suspended him for leaving the bottle on the car. I imagine he would have won if he would have grieved it.
  19. upsgrunt

    upsgrunt Well-Known Member

    If you're getting it on your hands, you weren't taught very good.:funny:
  20. dilligaf

    dilligaf IN VINO VERITAS

    :rofl:OOOOH, I could really say something not very nice. Something about 'size matters'.:nonono: