Funnies line I have heard from District Mgr!

rod

Retired 22 years
The funniest line I ever heard from a DM---------"Rod- I'm going to have your job" Turned out he probably wished he did have my job as he was the one that was shown the door.
 

UnconTROLLed

perfection
Six years ago, Sitting down after a shift was completed, on the end of a bulk slide in the primary, drinking water in 100 degree heat.

"You're fired for working unsafely. follow me"

I wasn't working. Also, I was sitting down which seems pretty safe.

Different DM just 4 months ago:

*I'm briskly walking a package down the preload line to a package car around 8:45 am*

"What are you doing?" DM says
"Bringing this package to the car it belongs in"
"well..uh...go punch out, now! I don't need you"

Really, did you think these packages walk themselves in? And since you don't need me, can I book off tomorrow?
 

raceanoncr

Well-Known Member
Kinda off the OP.

In '78, had been a heavy equipment operator for about 10 yrs and construction was going down. Package car was delivering to KMart next to one of our dirt jobs. I wanted out and bosses and others knew it. Said I should go to work for UPS.

"What?" I didn't even know what UPS was. They said, "They got some big trucks you could drive".

One day, I stopped my scraper next to KMart unloading dock wher p/c driver was unloading. Asked him how to get hired. He said, "That's they guy to ask". He had a rider that day.

Rider, a cocky little chit of a supe, said, "...and you'll never get hired anyway".

A month later, I was being escorted around the UPS center's offices, getting introduced to all the earth's shakers and movers. After being introduced to this little chit, I said, "Oh, you're the one that said I'd never get hired here, right?".

That was almost 33 yrs ago and he's been gone for about 31.
 

hypocrisy

Banned
Just an observation ... other than the OP, you are all talking about the Division Manager, not a District Manager.

True that, but the funniest thing I've heard from a Division Manager was his reaction to being shown a picture of a driver, in his monogrammed bathrobe, in his daughters bedroom. Unfortunately, it's unprintable here.
 

menotyou

bella amicizia
I am trying to get this straight, as I never really gave it much thought(and I am a little bored right now). Is Division lower that District? Or, vise versa? I know who in what city is higher and lower,here , but I never got their titles, just their names. And, of course, my nicknames for them.:wink2:
 

Catatonic

Nine Lives
I am trying to get this straight, as I never really gave it much thought(and I am a little bored right now). Is Division lower that District? Or, vise versa? I know who in what city is higher and lower,here , but I never got their titles, just their names. And, of course, my nicknames for them.:wink2:

District Manager (Level 22) is over Division Managers (Level 18).
 

menotyou

bella amicizia
District Manager (Level 22) is over Division Managers (Level 18).

Wow. Thanks. So, my knowing the District Labor Manager by his first name, and vise versa, probably isn't good?:laughing:

It was the District Manager I watched walk my old center manager out. I know him by name, too.

Boy, I think I know too many people!!

:rofl:
 

hypocrisy

Banned
True that, but the funniest thing I've heard from a Division Manager was his reaction to being shown a picture of a driver, in his monogrammed bathrobe, in his daughters bedroom. Unfortunately, it's unprintable here.

Man I still can't get it straight. He was a District Manager, as his name was on our checks.Not that it really matters, as I show all of them equal respect, or disrespect, as the occasion and their attitude warrants.

I've never been afraid of them knowing my name Menotyou.
 

menotyou

bella amicizia
Man I still can't get it straight. He was a District Manager, as his name was on our checks.Not that it really matters, as I show all of them equal respect, or disrespect, as the occasion and their attitude warrants.

I've never been afraid of them knowing my name Menotyou.

I'm not afraid. They are wimps. When they come to town, they have not given any warning to the unsuspecting employee. They swoop in like lemmings on steroids. They follow each other, patting each other on the back for destroying (usually) innocent people who are just trying to make a living.

The last time I was dragged upstairs without warning, I was with our ever worthless BA. In front of these punks, I told the fat hamburglar he worked for me not them and he better remember that. He knew why they were in town, and he didn't warn me, either. If they want you to be able to fairly defend yourself, they would give you a heads up. Yes, I'm talking management. I had the District Manager, the Labor Division Manager, and the Labor sup who is a pompous ass. They tried accusing me of all sorts of things. Once again, with video. Apparently, they still haven't learned anything. I walked out, not just with my head high, but with a prior warning letter thrown out-Thanks to my witness, the Labor Sup. Idiot dispatcher lied and wrote me up for no call no show. I wasn't scheduled to work. He asked if I would work and I said no. He lied and said I said yes, then, didn't show. Idiot forgot that I was a steward and had a grievance meeting that day by phone with Labor sup. I told Labor sup that I would not work with Psycho Susie as she is violent. So, if they work and don't call me, I won't grieve. (Air shuttler/driver, at the time). Idiot dispatcher went into meeting after me and Labor sup told him this. I never spoke to the idiot, again. He lied in the meeting with the punks, and Labor Division Manager threw out letter, after hearing that. And, said he would speak with the idiot.

I think idiot and Psycho really thought I was a gonner. Sorry. They will never be promoted. I have been told by a reliable source. They both hate their jobs and each other. Yet, every day have to work together. She is the type to go over her own bosses head and email Syr what's going on at our center, things that have no bearing on her job, or her. Bunch of snakes forced to live together.

Very befitting.
 

tarbar66

Well-Known Member
I'm not afraid. They are wimps. When they come to town, they have not given any warning to the unsuspecting employee. They swoop in like lemmings on steroids. They follow each other, patting each other on the back for destroying (usually) innocent people who are just trying to make a living.

The last time I was dragged upstairs without warning, I was with our ever worthless BA. In front of these punks, I told the fat hamburglar he worked for me not them and he better remember that. He knew why they were in town, and he didn't warn me, either. If they want you to be able to fairly defend yourself, they would give you a heads up. Yes, I'm talking management. I had the District Manager, the Labor Division Manager, and the Labor sup who is a pompous ass. They tried accusing me of all sorts of things. Once again, with video. Apparently, they still haven't learned anything. I walked out, not just with my head high, but with a prior warning letter thrown out-Thanks to my witness, the Labor Sup. Idiot dispatcher lied and wrote me up for no call no show. I wasn't scheduled to work. He asked if I would work and I said no. He lied and said I said yes, then, didn't show. Idiot forgot that I was a steward and had a grievance meeting that day by phone with Labor sup. I told Labor sup that I would not work with Psycho Susie as she is violent. So, if they work and don't call me, I won't grieve. (Air shuttler/driver, at the time). Idiot dispatcher went into meeting after me and Labor sup told him this. I never spoke to the idiot, again. He lied in the meeting with the punks, and Labor Division Manager threw out letter, after hearing that. And, said he would speak with the idiot.

I think idiot and Psycho really thought I was a gonner. Sorry. They will never be promoted. I have been told by a reliable source. They both hate their jobs and each other. Yet, every day have to work together. She is the type to go over her own bosses head and email Syr what's going on at our center, things that have no bearing on her job, or her. Bunch of snakes forced to live together.

Very befitting.

Wow, All the meetings of the above type that I was part of did not have a cast of characters that you described. I guess back then UPS was a kinder, gentler place to be. People still had intergrity on both sides of the fence. My business agent got my termination lowered to a a week suspension with out a lot of drama. That was back in the 70's.
 

menotyou

bella amicizia
The higher up you go, in my experience, the more pompous the ass. The more they have to make a show of how they are going to teach you a lesson. Some show.
 

flushingCenterSucks

Active Member
my dm told me, " i dont know you but i dont like you !" " if u dont like what goes on here, theres the fn door " this coming from a guy that i never spoke a word to before except " good morning "
 
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