Men Are Simple

Discussion in 'Life After Brown' started by tourists24, Oct 24, 2010.

  1. tourists24

    tourists24 Well-Known Member

    One of my favorite comedians with good clean

  2. bbsam

    bbsam Moderator Staff Member

    You know the phrase, "men are pigs"? It's really biological. Pig organs are used in human patients afterall.
  3. fxdwg

    fxdwg Member

    This is a really stupid comment..
  4. moreluck

    moreluck golden ticket member

    Why did God invent a man first?

    She wanted to start with something simple.
  5. moreluck

    moreluck golden ticket member

    Men are like remote controls.Simple. Easy to use. And usually lying around a TV.
  6. moreluck

    moreluck golden ticket member

    Men are simple. If she's fine, we're thinking one thought. We're like: 'Damn! I'd hit that.' And if she's ugly -- if she's ugly -- we're like: 'Damn, oh! I'd hit that.'
  7. bbsam

    bbsam Moderator Staff Member

    Stupid as in stupid or stupid as in obvious? C'mon help me/you out. It can't be stupid as in bad information, 'cause it's true. Know what "Mythbusters" uses in place of human cadavers? Do you know why?
  8. moreluck

    moreluck golden ticket member

    Men Are Just Happier People-- What do you expect from such simple creatures?

    Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park.

    Car mechanics tell you the truth.. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay.

    Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$ 100. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time. !

    Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.

    You NEVER see the dust accumulating. Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.

    Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck.

    You can play with toys all your life. Your belly usually hides your big hips. One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.

    You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

    No wonder men are happier
  9. fethrs

    fethrs Well-Known Member

    PIgs, cus they are close to humans in so many ways.
  10. Monkey Butt

    Monkey Butt Dark Prince of Double Standards Staff Member

    Men are simple compared to women ... the song "Mood Ring" written by Paul Thorn pretty much sums up one aspect.

    I know nothing about this woman, Everything I do is wrong
    Sometimes it's hard to fathom, Just what page she's on
    I found a pretty little mood ring, At the local five and dime
    It's gonna' solve all my problems, For a dollar ninety-nine

    I followed the instructions, I read them word for word
    I memorized the color chart, Cause I wanted to be sure
    I told her, "Baby it's the thought that counts", When I slipped it on her hand
    And then I crossed my fingers, With this ring I'll understand
    If it turns black, I should turn back
    If it turns red, She liked what I said
    If it turns blue, I should leave her alone
    If it turns green, She wants me I know
  11. bbsam

    bbsam Moderator Staff Member

    Thank-you, fethrs. Still stupid, dwg?
  12. over9five

    over9five Moderator Staff Member

    Cracked me up when Sinbad said he could find all his stuff......except the stuff she put in a new spot.
    My wife does that all the time. Something that's had its spot for 20 years, one day gets moved to a new spot!
  13. ajblakejr

    ajblakejr Age quod agis

    I believe it is the simple things that bring us the most joy in our lives.

    Men are awesome.

    Simple pleasures come from men.
  14. bbsam

    bbsam Moderator Staff Member

    Yes. The Sunday paper and the commode. Simple pleasures coming from men.
  15. fxdwg

    fxdwg Member

    I guess it's not that stupid... I was thinking more about "not" bashing women and when I read that again, I realize that you weren't... We're good (I hope):happy-very:
  16. ajblakejr

    ajblakejr Age quod agis

    If that makes a man is okay with me.
  17. bbsam

    bbsam Moderator Staff Member

    Oh indeed! As sure as the sun rises in the east and sets in the west; as sure as Brett Favre will retire again at the end of the season, as sure as the "prevent defense" brings groans to fans everywhere and as sure as Ed Hochuli will subtley flex "the guns" when the making an "inelligible receiver down field" call, I can unequivocally tell you that great pleasure is had by the King on his throne. Somehow all seems well and right in the world from that kingly perch.
  18. bbsam

    bbsam Moderator Staff Member

    LOL. Of course we're good.
  19. ajblakejr

    ajblakejr Age quod agis

    It brings me pleasure that it brings Ed pleasure....because it is very nice.
  20. fxdwg

    fxdwg Member

    Very Clever AJ:happy-very: