Random thoughts

moreluck

golden ticket member
Why do doctors leave the room when you change? They're going to see you without your clothes on anyway.

Where does the toe tag go on a dead person if they don't have toes?

If your driving a federal owned car, and you run a stop sign, is it considered a felony?
 

moreluck

golden ticket member
Why do people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up every few hours?

Why is there a disclaimer on the Allstate Auto Insurance commercials that says "Not available in all states"?

If you dug a hole through the center of the earth, and jumped in, would you stay at the center because of gravity?
 

moreluck

golden ticket member
Ten Thoughts to Ponder...

Number 10
Life is sexually transmitted.

Number 9
Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

Number 8
Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.

Number 7
Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.

Number 6
Some people are like a Slinky.....not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.

Number 5
Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

Number 4
All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

Number 3
Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?

Number 2
In the 60s, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT...

America knows exactly where one cow with mad-cow disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America, but they haven't got a clue as to where thousands of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe the USA should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of immigration.
 
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