Things said in front of customers.

[Future]

I asked a female customer once when she was due to have her baby and she informed me icily that she wasn't pregnant. I could have crawled out *under* the door. I'll never do that again. Ever.

Did the same thing......her body was fit and normal except for the bulge around stomach area....I had looked at it for a couple times b4 i dropped the bomb......and o yes it exploded in my face when she said she was not pregnant! How the hell do you dance out of that one!Felt like crap

 

[Future]

I always wait until she or one of her co-workers says she's pregnant. Avoids an embarrassing "oh crap" moment.

Lessen learned......!!!

 

[idrivethetruck]

Whenever I deliver to a pregnant customer, I usually say "You're looking swell". It goes over some of their heads, but most respond with a laugh. I usually wait until it's very obvious that they are indeed pregnant or they've confirmed it first.

 

[BrownTexas]

I delivered to a business once where a bunch of older women sew quilts all day long. As I walk in they start cat calling me, like I were a sexy lady walking by a construction site. After being told I had to walk all the way across the room to get a signature, I realized these ladies were nothing but a good time. As I approached the door to leave I loudly said "Oh no, I dropped my pen. I better get it." I took my pen out of my pocket and tossed it to the floor towards the door. I bent over making sure to leave my ass in the air and picked it up. They all whistled and hollered. It was hilarious. Needless to say I walked to the truck laughing and very red faced. But it was well worth it.

 

[Operational needs]

I delivered to a business once where a bunch of older women sew quilts all day long. As I walk in they start cat calling me, like I were a sexy lady walking by a construction site. After being told I had to walk all the way across the room to get a signature, I realized these ladies were nothing but a good time. As I approached the door to leave I loudly said "Oh no, I dropped my pen. I better get it." I took my pen out of my pocket and tossed it to the floor towards the door. I bent over making sure to leave my ass in the air and picked it up. They all whistled and hollered. It was hilarious. Needless to say I walked to the truck laughing and very red faced. But it was well worth it.

I love fun old people.

 

[bleedinbrown58]

Did the same thing......her body was fit and normal except for the bulge around stomach area....I had looked at it for a couple times b4 i dropped the bomb......and o yes it exploded in my face when she said she was not pregnant! How the hell do you dance out of that one!Felt like crap

You don't...lol. When in doubt....saying nothing is better!

 

[bleedinbrown58]

So my best friend is a beer delivery driver he told me a story about one of their drivers that got me to thinking. What have you said in front of customers that either embarrassed you or you knew immediately was a no no?

I'll tell you the story about the beer guy for a few laughs. This guys calls his beer soldiers for some reason and every time he drops a beer or case he yells soldier down. Well he delivers to the local VFW and I guess dropped some beer one day around lunch when it was packed.

Lmao...I used to work in a different grocery years ago...the associates on the floor would have to call maintenance over the intercom for spills and accidents...Cleanup aisle five. Some girl one day...comes over the intercom..Man down...aisle six! Lol...and it stuck...anytime something would fall or a customer breaks anything...whoa..man down! I still use it to this day at UPS for box avalanches or if a box falls and makes a huge noise...lol.

 

[dezguy]

I had a del for a geared to income apartment building. Lady answers the door and she's pushing 4 bills. Shirt is all tattered and her tit is hanging out one of the tears and, as an added bonus, the whole apartment smells like piss and .

Two stops later, I get to an optomertrist's office that was a reg for me and start complaining about this lady. The girls who work there are all asking where this happened and I notice one of the girls gets really quiet. I ask her if she's ok and she says, "I think you're talking about my mom."

I felt horrible and I could feel my face just turn beat red. Worst part is, the daughter of this woman was smoking hot. A couple of days later I had her sign for some contacts and as she was signing I told her I was really sorry for complaining about her mom. She said it was ok and she knows her mom is a slob. Felt a bit better but not much.

 

[ups1990]

I got pulled off of a route once for muttering "That's what she said." after a woman commented on how a package was bigger than she expected.

Though I've dropped the line many, many times.

So you're that guy!
Every group has this person. They interupt every conversation to only interject this phrase.

 

[ups1990]

If someone asks me "Do I need to sign?" and they don't, I always reply "No, you're fine."

If it's a pretty lady, I will also include a slight smile.

Ba-dum tshh!

 

[superballs63]

I got pulled off of a route once for muttering "That's what she said." after a woman commented on how a package was bigger than she expected.

Though I've dropped the line many, many times.

I delivered to a Salon one day, and there were some attractive, middle aged ladies. The owner writes out the COD, and says something along the lines of "it's not even that big". I told her "It's not the size that counts, but how you use it". We all chuckled and I walked out with my cheeks all red.

 

[bleedinbrown58]

I delivered to a Salon one day, and there were some attractive, middle aged ladies. The owner writes out the COD, and says something along the lines of "it's not even that big". I told her "It's not the size that counts, but how you use it". We all chuckled and I walked out with my cheeks all red.

 

[ibleedbrown]

It works both ways. I've got one female customer at a business
that will drop a "That's what she said" on you in a heartbeat. She routinely shocks some of my younger cover drivers.

i had a female customer use a that's what he said on me once lol can't remember what it was in response to.

 

[rod]

I did the classic pull up to a house with a bunch of cars parked out front. Lady opens the door and I say I have a package for Joe----looks like he is having a party. She says Joe died last night. (exit 2 inches tall)

 

[bleedinbrown58]

I did the classic pull up to a house with a bunch of cars parked out front. Lady opens the door and I say I have a package for Joe----looks like he is having a party. She says Joe died last night. (exit 2 inches tall)

 

[IVE GOTTA PACKAGE 4U]

I delivered to a Salon one day, and there were some attractive, middle aged ladies. The owner writes out the COD, and says something along the lines of "it's not even that big". I told her "It's not the size that counts, but how you use it". We all chuckled and I walked out with my cheeks all red.

Which cheeks? Any dollar bills?

 

[Brownslave688]

I delivered to a business once where a bunch of older women sew quilts all day long. As I walk in they start cat calling me, like I were a sexy lady walking by a construction site. After being told I had to walk all the way across the room to get a signature, I realized these ladies were nothing but a good time. As I approached the door to leave I loudly said "Oh no, I dropped my pen. I better get it." I took my pen out of my pocket and tossed it to the floor towards the door. I bent over making sure to leave my ass in the air and picked it up. They all whistled and hollered. It was hilarious. Needless to say I walked to the truck laughing and very red faced. But it was well worth it.

Uh I don't get the embarrassed red face? This is when I would go home and explain To my wife how lucky of a woman she was.

 

[wayfair]

I did the classic pull up to a house with a bunch of cars parked out front. Lady opens the door and I say I have a package for Joe----looks like he is having a party. She says Joe died last night. (exit 2 inches tall)

had a similar delivery. I was delivering a couple cases of Monovie to a house when a fella in his late 20's early 30's told me to go ahead and send it back because it doesn't work, "my Father died last week"

question: why did they take the "deceased" option out of the diad for non delivery?

 

[TooTechie]

Did the same thing......her body was fit and normal except for the bulge around stomach area....I had looked at it for a couple times b4 i dropped the bomb......and o yes it exploded in my face when she said she was not pregnant! How the hell do you dance out of that one!Felt like crap

The other reason to steer clear of the pregnancy conversation is if someone was pregnant and has a miscarriage...it takes a long time for that bump to go down...and a miscarriage is a horrible thing.

 

[TooTechie]

I still use it to this day at UPS for box avalanches or if a box falls and makes a huge noise...lol.

When i worked inside early on I unloaded for a brief time and we had an older guy who was an unsafe unloader. He would just pull walls over in the trailer, some boxes landing on the extendo, most on the floor, some hitting him and the people working with him.

One night he pulled over a wall without telling me so I could back up the hell out of the way and I got knocked on my butt, damn near unconscious. I left the trailer, had to sit down for like 20 minutes and eventually went back to work, but advised the full time sup that I would not be working in a trailer with him ever again.

He never learned because a month later he was unloading in a trailer and again pulled a wall over on himself, this time one of the boxes smashed him right in the face. I was on vacation but I was told by the guy who was working next to him that he spit his front two teeth out on the floor of the trailer and kept working...Sure enough I saw him the next week and he was missing his front teeth. Still is to this day.