Getting married as a preloader/ cover driver

[UpstateNYUPSer(Ret)]

Just FYI if I were to do it all over I wouldn't spend a dime on the wedding and take whatever the parents and inlaws were going to contribute and put that towards a home.

When my daughter and son-in-law were planning their wedding I offered to give them $5K toward the down payment for their home if they were willing to scale down their plans. They opted for the big wedding, which ended up costing, with donated services included, just over $20K.

I have to admit that it was a beautiful wedding.

 

[BrownThunder]

Our wedding was beautiful too. Our family still compares other weddings to ours. That's great and everything, but we could have put that 40 grand towards our first home. We've been married since 2012 and are finally closing on our first house after saving up for 3 long years.

I could have done without.... Oh..... 80% of the bs we blew money on. Maybe she sees it different because it was her special pageant where all if the attention was on her. Weddings are so bride-centric its repulsive. Whatever what's done is done. Do yourself a favor, go get married in court and have your ceremony when you can afford it. And leave those credit cards in your wallet

 

[ChrisTheBrown]

25 years later.... She hasn't got rid of me yet.

I've been thinking about IVE being my best man. Lol

 

[ChrisTheBrown]

Sorry about turning this thread to a different direction Chris. I wish you and your future wife all the best.

Thanks man, she's a treasure.

 

[ChrisTheBrown]

Also couldn't imagine not living together first. I know others have different beliefs. However you'll learn more in the first couple months living together than you have in 2 years dating.

We live right across the hall from each other, most days, seems like we're already living together..As we see each other nearly every day.

 

[IVE GOTTA PACKAGE 4U]

I've been thinking about IVE being my best man. Lol

You are a wise young man.

 

[ChrisTheBrown]

One person needs to be in charge of the bills. At the same time, each one needs their only money.

Chris,don't listen to us. Congratulations on your soon to be wedding.

Save me a good table and don't be cheap on the beer .!

Plan on having an open bar..We already have a nice place in mind for a reception, & have reserved this August 15th...Which is what we're hoping for..Would love to have ya IVE, but we live in central NY..Don't know how far away you are....But yeah lol

 

[ChrisTheBrown]

Chris, this guy doesn't work for UPS, he is single, a troll, a liar, and makes no sense 90% of the time. I wouldn't listen to a thing he has to say...If you think it's the right time to ask her to marry you, go for it. If she feels the same way, it wouldn't matter if you earned your living picking cans from the trash, things will work out.

A lack of money isn't always that big of a deal. Sure you can't buy her the biggest ring or buy a house right away but those things take time no matter what. Not everyone starts out in life rich thats what makes marriage fun...getting those things together. My folks got married after the apartment they had burned down and they lost everything. They were homeless for about 3 months bouncing between friends, family, their car, and other places. My father told me that after mom stayed with him through all that, he needed to keep her so he proposed and wouldn't ya know it, she felt the same way. Still married after all these years!

Dude, money isn't everything and if it is meant to be it will work out. Go for it and let us know how you proposed and when the date is!

Thanks so much! I feel so encouraged! Truly appreciate your advice, & kindness. Plan on buying her ring this weekend, I can't believe this time has finally come.

 

[ChrisTheBrown]

If you are planning on going driving, make sure she is cool with it. The long, exhausting hours can put a major strain on a marriage as well as not knowing when you are going to be done for the day. It takes a special person to be a UPS spouse. Best of luck to you and your fiancee.

She is very well aware of the hectic UPS driving schedules, & is extremely supportive, which means so much to me...As this is what I desire to do for a career.

 

[olroadbeech]

we got married when we were dead broke. I think its better that way instead of getting married when you have lots of money. people who get married young and broke and endure many storms are like th mighty oak tree who has also weathered many storms and are stronger for it.

we wouldn't trade in all the hard times we had for anything. of course, it wasn't much fun going thru them but looking back it was good because you';ll appreciate the good times more.

good luck and check back in, in 25 years.

 

[SafeYARDdog]

Plan on having an open bar..We already have a nice place in mind for a reception, & have reserved this August 15th...Which is what we're hoping for..Would love to have ya IVE, but we live in central NY..Don't know how far away you are....But yeah lol

That's great Chris. Best wishes for you both.

 

[UpstateNYUPSer(Ret)]

Plan on having an open bar..We already have a nice place in mind for a reception, & have reserved this August 15th...Which is what we're hoping for..Would love to have ya IVE, but we live in central NY..Don't know how far away you are....But yeah lol

Do yourself a favor and put a time limit (1 hour?) on the open bar.

 

[ChrisTheBrown]

Do yourself a favor and put a time limit (1 hour?) on the open bar.

Yeah, I've gotta get that all figured out..Not sure how much that would run me for say around 100 people, we're gonna try & keep it at. Still gotta do invitations & all that, & propose here soon..(Most importantly) haha

 

[IVE GOTTA PACKAGE 4U]

Yeah, I've gotta get that all figured out..Not sure how much that would run me for say around 100 people, we're gonna try & keep it at. Still gotta do invitations & all that, & propose here soon..(Most importantly) haha

Try booking a local fireball for the reception. Some of these places will killntou on costs. 100 person minimum. At $30+ a plate. Then you got the alcohol,cake,d.j.,photographer. It adds yo quick.

 

[Brownslave688]

We live right across the hall from each other, most days, seems like we're already living together..As we see each other nearly every day.

I wish you all the best but it's not the same as living together. Soon you'll understand.

 

[ChrisTheBrown]

Try booking a local fireball for the reception. Some of these places will killntou on costs. 100 person minimum. At $30+ a plate. Then you got the alcohol,cake,d.j.,photographer. It adds yo quick.

This place we're looking into seems pretty reasonable, looked at prices on their website..Most of their food prices (goes by 1/2 tray or full tray, for buffet type setting) are between like $30-$68. I've been saving pretty aggressively, over these past few months, so not overly worried on what it's gonna cost. We have a couple of people from our church that are avid photographers, very confident that they'll take pictures for us, & at a reasonable price..If they even charge us anything. Gonna try to be as smart as we can though, as far as what we spend. Not looking to spend any more then we have to..Also looking to move into a whole different apartment together, after we get married. Have a lot of work & planning to do, if we're gonna be able to accomplish all of this, this August.

 

[IVE GOTTA PACKAGE 4U]

This place we're looking into seems pretty reasonable, looked at prices on their website..Most of their food prices (goes by 1/2 tray or full tray, for buffet type setting) are between like $30-$68. I've been saving pretty aggressively, over these past few months, so not overly worried on what it's gonna cost. We have a couple of people from our church that are avid photographers, very confident that they'll take pictures for us, & at a reasonable price..If they even charge us anything. Gonna try to be as smart as we can though, as far as what we spend. Not looking to spend any more then we have to..Also looking to move into a whole different apartment together, after we get married. Have a lot of work & planning to do, if we're gonna be able to accomplish all of this, this August.

Better book your hall now.

 

[olroadbeech]

we got married for about 40 bucks in lake Tahoe. my husband found the flowers at the cemetery and the ring was zirconia. then we won over 3000 bucks at the casinos. we took the money we saved from a big wedding and the 3k and put it down on a house that we paid off in 15 years.

last year we passed 7 figures in net assets. serious.

we didn't want to start off in the red. glad we didn't. we are only in our 50's and will be retired this year and can do whatever we want for the next 25 years.

it was all planned that way in the beginning.

 

[Brownslave688]

Do yourself a favor and put a time limit (1 hour?) on the open bar.

Yeah we have a full 5 hour open bar coming up for the wife's 30th. Should be interesting

 

[IVE GOTTA PACKAGE 4U]

Yeah we have a full 5 hour open bar coming up for the wife's 30th. Should be interesting

What time should we arrive?