If drivers set rules for the suits

Mr Mcfeely

Shpeedy Delivery!
I thought it would be a good idea for drivers to lay down some "changes" for the suits. These changes would save the company $. Good for a laugh at least, feel free to add your ideas.

Lets start here,

1. The bathrooms will be permanently closed to house the droid 224 units. Their primary function will be answering phone calls and emails during the weekend. So from now on you will have to find a new location to tend to your "business". Remember to stay hydrated!

2. Air conditioning units will be removed and replaced with windows and water stations. A large fan may be provided.

3. All office chairs are to be traded in for the newest Eco friendly freightliner / workhorse folding chair models.

4. Only 1 janitor will be allowed for every 600 office workers, if your office has 602 workers. You may have another janitor.

5. Any UPS my choice customers may track your current location, and be notified when you sit or leave your desk.

6. If you jam the printer/fax, break a coffee mug or scratch the paint on your folding chair will be considered an accident.

7. Paper cuts or carpal tunnel injuries will require your supervisor to work with you the following day.


Resident Suit
Wanna grab a hot chocolate?


Well-Known Member
8. If you’re out more than 2 days sick you dont need a doctor’s note. In fact the longer you’re gone the better. This place runs better without you