My kind of woman

Discussion in 'Life After Brown' started by tarbar66, Dec 4, 2009.

  1. tarbar66

    tarbar66 Active Member

    He found himself swept up on the shore of an island with no other
    people, no supplies... Nothing. Only bananas and coconuts.

    After about four months, he is lying on the beach one day when the most
    gorgeous woman he has ever seen rows up to him. In disbelief, he asks

    "Where did you come from? How did you get here?"

    "I rowed over from the other side of the island," she says. "I landed
    here when my cruise ship sank."

    "Amazing," he says. "You were really lucky to have a rowboat wash up
    with you."

    "Oh, this?" replies the woman. "I made the rowboat out of raw material
    found on the island.

    I whittled the oars from gum tree branches; wove the bottom from palm
    branches; and the sides and stern came from a Eucalyptus tree."

    "But ... but ... that's impossible," stutters Ed. "You had no tools or
    hardware. How did you manage?"

    "Oh, no problem," replies the woman. "On the South side of the island,
    there is a very unusual strata of alluvial rock exposed.

    I found if I fired it to a certain temperature in my kiln, it melted
    into forgeable ductile iron. I used that for tools and used the tools
    to make the hardware." Ed is stunned.

    "Let's row over to my place," she says.

    After a few minutes of rowing, she docks the boat at a small wharf.

    As Ed looks onto shore, he nearly falls out of the boat. Before him is
    a stone walk leading to an exquisite bungalow painted in blue and
    white. While the woman ties up the rowboat with an expertly woven hemp
    rope, he can only stare ahead, dumbstruck.

    As they walk into the house, she says casually, "It's not much, but I
    call it home. Sit down, please. Would you like to have a drink?"

    "No, no thank you," he says, still dazed. "Can't take any more coconut
    juice." "It's not coconut juice," the woman replies. "I built a still.
    How about a Pina Colada?"

    Trying to hide his continued amazement, he accepts, and they sit down
    on her hand-woven couch to talk. After they have exchanged their
    stories, the woman announces, "I'm going to slip into something more
    comfortable. Would you like to take a shower and shave? There is a
    razor upstairs in the cabinet in the bathroom."

    No longer questioning anything, Ed goes into the bathroom. There, in
    the cabinet, is a razor made from a bone handle. Two shells honed to a
    hollow-ground edge are fastened on to its end inside of a swivel
    mechanism. "WOW! This woman is amazing," he muses, "what next?"

    When he returns, she greets him wearing 'nothing but vines'
    strategically positioned, and smelling faintly of gardenias. She beckons
    for him to sit down next to her.

    "Tell me," she begins suggestively, slithering closer to him, "We've
    been out here for a really long time. I know you've been lonely.
    There's something I'm sure you really feel like doing right now,
    something you've been longing for all these months. You know..."

    She stares into his eyes. He can't believe what he's hearing! "You
    mean ...", he swallows excitedly, "We can watch the Steelers game from
  2. rod

    rod retired and happy

    too long to read---- I was looking for the pictures
  3. grgrcr88

    grgrcr88 No It's not green grocer!

    There all my kind!!!
  4. tarbar66

    tarbar66 Active Member

    Where's your imagination?
  5. Jones

    Jones fILE A GRIEVE! Staff Member

    Adrianne Curry is a little more my speed (with a picture for rod)
  6. moreluck

    moreluck golden ticket member

    Carly Fiorina

    Just wanted to include a REAL woman and not just have Playboy Bimbos in this thread.
  7. rod

    rod retired and happy

    Thank Jones--------------you know how hard it is to find pictures of naked girls on the internet.:wink2:
  8. over9five

    over9five Moderator Staff Member

    I didn't even know this was possible.
  9. over9five

    over9five Moderator Staff Member

  10. Jones

    Jones fILE A GRIEVE! Staff Member

    I'm there for ya bud :wink2:

    But the real hook for me was getting baked and playing WoW all day, since that's essentially my plan for retirement.
  11. rod

    rod retired and happy

    Holy crap-that was a couple of terrible explosions:surprised:
  12. over9five

    over9five Moderator Staff Member

    And in a really bad location too...
  13. I'd like to see the picture of the pregnant Janet Reno again.......

    I actually saw some "Hotness" in her eyes and hips....
  14. dilligaf

    dilligaf IN VINO VERITAS

    You are one sick puppy! :surprised::faint::rofl:
  15. trplnkl

    trplnkl 555

    You've GOT to be kidding me...right?
  16. moreluck

    moreluck golden ticket member

    Why would I be kidding.....she's a cancer survivor.....that's a chemo hairstyle she's wearing.
    She's the ex-CEO of Hewlitt Packard and she's going to kick Barbara Boxer's ass out of California politics in the next election!

    She's got brains, she's a fighter & survivor, she's actually worked in the real world and........bimbo is not on her resume!
    No, I'm not kidding.
  17. dilligaf

    dilligaf IN VINO VERITAS

    Oooops, in a little hot water there? :surprised::wink2:
  18. Jones

    Jones fILE A GRIEVE! Staff Member

    She's got her work cut out for her there. Boxer leads her in the polls by a pretty good margin, and she's also a prodigious fund raiser. Fiorina likely has a tough primary battle on her hands as well.
  19. moreluck

    moreluck golden ticket member

    I'm keeping my fingers crossed.
  20. cachsux

    cachsux Wah

    Bimbos need love too!