Ups driver going through a divorce. It's hard

Discussion in 'UPS Discussions' started by onehandsolo, Feb 1, 2015.

  1. onehandsolo

    onehandsolo Active Member

    Thanx for reading. I have been separated for almost a year and will sone be divorced. I am in my mid forties and have no kids. Was wondering how some of you guys and girls made it through this process. It is really hard starting over with this job and at this stage in my life.
     
  2. PASinterference

    PASinterference Yes, I know I'm working late.

    Keep your mind busy working and find an escape when you are not working. I am married to the spawn of satan and thats how I deal with it. Freakin horomones. I swear they eat brain cells.
     
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  3. retiredTxfeeder

    retiredTxfeeder cap'n crunch

    This job is hard on marriages. Easily 50% of the drivers I worked with had been divorced, some multiple times. I told my wife going in what kind of hours I worked. I knew because I had been driving about 5 years before we met. When I went into feeders, we had another long talk about me working nights for an extended period. She was good with it and she still has me around after 34 years, so I guess I'm doing something right. lol. I feel bad for your situation, and you will come out of this ok.
     
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  4. Future

    Future Well-Known Member

    Very hard....I had no family to rely on and did have one child involved. What got me through in a summary was friends. My first concern was my son, to make sure he was safe and secure. I did have primary custody of him for about a year during the long and ugly divorce proceedings. He played travel hockey at the time and the "hockey moms and dads" really came through to help me along in all aspects of his wellness.Feel fortunate you have no children involved in your situation.It is difficult to start over with this job(hrs).....my advice to you is dont go hell bent looking for a new relationship (as I kinda did)....it will come naturally and at the oddest moment.....you need to stay strong(as possible).....stay away from boozin or going out to bars late etc unless that is a norm for you....In the end you dont want your job performance to plummet and get yourself in deep caca there. Talk to your sups or center manager(if you can) if you are having issues emotionally with the situation, they should allow a little grace period for you to regroup etc.....but dont count on it for to long.
     
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  5. Brownslave688

    Brownslave688 You want a toe? I can get you a toe.

    Work. We had a driver get divorced (granted less than a year of marriage). He made almost 125k last I believe.

    I'm curious why does this hard job make divorce harder than someone else's job?
     
  6. HEFFERNAN

    HEFFERNAN Huge Member

    Going through a divorce or having a spouse die are major life events.
    If you need some time off, take it. It's important to have your mind straight.
    I found that delivering residentials tends to give your mind free time to think too much or wander.
    Keep a radio on or listen to podcasts during your resi deliveries. The music or talking keeps your brain occupied.
    The high pace of the UPS workday keeps you busy and is way better than sitting in a cubicle staring at a computer.

    Sorry you're going through this. At least a child isn't involved which would ramp up the stress level.
    Keep fighting through it and you will come out of it a better person.
     
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  7. greengrenades

    greengrenades To be the man, you gotta beat the man.

    I've never been divorced but please for the love of everything, don't jump right into a new long relationship. You are still fairly young, get a bachelor pad, get a new truck, a dog, and just pick up as much trim as you can. Do it for men everywhere.
     
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  8. olroadbeech

    olroadbeech Happy Verified UPSer

    that advice works for women too!
     
  9. olroadbeech

    olroadbeech Happy Verified UPSer

    "my advice to you is to start drinking heavily."

    went thru this over 30 years ago. was real depressed til friends dragged me out and I started partying. went thru a lot of guys , real short term for almost 2 years. then found the right one. going on almost 30 years. wouldn't trade my guy for anything.

    sometimes you have to go thru hell to get to heaven.
     
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  10. DONT start drinking. That solves nothing. Last thing you need is a DUI! Hope you find some peace and the heaviness removed from your heart.

    This job is stressful enough, without have personal problems on top of it.
     
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  11. Pooter

    Pooter Active Member

    Mid 40s, single with a 60k+ job?

    Stop being a puss and do whatever the hell you want. :D
     
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  12. Sleeve_meet_Heart

    Sleeve_meet_Heart making the unreadable unreadabler

    make sure you get the cat

    :)
     
  13. sportsjock

    sportsjock Member

    Man my on road sup went through this while I was on my 30 days probation to become a driver. He was emotionally beat down. The first three days when he was training me on the training route. He couldn't remember how to run the route. His mind was frazzled!! I started thinking I'm screwed. But luckily I drove utility for that center on occasion and I was familiar with the route from driving utility. I didn't have to rely on him too much. His wife called all day long threatening to leave and take his son. This dude was so stressed out I felt sorry for him. He eventually went out on stress leave she worried him so much. It didn't help he drove four hours a day to get to work. So he was leaving home early and getting home late.

    Man just do you!! Just keep your mind right. Stay strong my brother.
     
  14. Wally

    Wally Hailing from Parts Unknown.

    Find the hottest chick you can. It will drive her insane.
     
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  15. chew.gif
     
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  16. theshizz

    theshizz New Member

    Just went through a divorce with two kids she tried to take me to the cleaners. Had to go out on leave I was a wreck. It's all done now and there are no good answers for you, keep your friends close be good to yourself. Just remember all day long at work those chicks dig you and want overnight deliveries all night, hahaha jk don't get yourself in trouble focus on the job.

    "You know why divorce costs so much? Because it's worth it!"-theshizz
     
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  17. bbsam

    bbsam Moderator Staff Member

    Back off! She's mine!
     
  18. Brownslave688

    Brownslave688 You want a toe? I can get you a toe.

    60k+?

    More like 80k plus and if I was single it'd be 100k plus. I can sleep when I'm dead.
     
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  19. Bring it on Fedex guy.
    giphy (14).gif
     
  20. Brownslave688

    Brownslave688 You want a toe? I can get you a toe.

    I always had you pegged for a chubby chaser.