S
serenity now
Guest
37 years here * I've done hard time
The problem lies in society as a whole. So many people get married before they figure out who they really are. So they get married then 5 years later they begin to really find themselves and the spouse now finds they dont really like the new you. I also think so many people look to others to define their self worth that when they find someone who makes them feel good they "fall in love." Another thing I find in the twenty somethings is that SOOOOO many of them think they should have what their parents have... But they dont want to wait 20 years to get it like their parents did. Marriage is one of if not the hardest thing you will ever do. If done right the good times will out number the bad, but the bad can not be avoided. You have to have the fortitude to push through. Something the upcoming generations dont have. They have all been told they are special, they are unique, they can do anything, we dont keep score, and please go to time out. When the reality is most kids arent special, and failure is how you build character. You learn that you may not be special, you may not be unique and that you need to work harder. Which is what marriage is about working harder, the harder you work at it the better it is.
A
anonymous6
Guest
hence your moniker?
gingerkat
Well-Known Member
Nicky, I agree with you on so many fronts, but disagree on others. I don't think there is a "recipe" for a good marriage or even staying together, or there would be minimal or no divorces. People don't get married with the intentions of getting divorced, or at least most don't. I think it's just a sign of the times perhaps? Maybe when my grandparents, even parents were married, they stayed married through thick and thin, because that is what they were supposed to do? Even though there was infidelity, abuse, financial issues and so many other problems, it just didn't matter, you stayed married, period. Which is worse? Staying in for the long haul when things are really bad or giving yourself permission to leave and try again if that is what you choose?
We all change as we grow older, and thank goodness for that, or we'd be stuck in a non-growth mentality. A good question is how do we find a partner that is open to growth while the relationship continues? Honestly I don't think you can. You can guess and hope, but there are no guarantees. That's why I think marriage is the biggest gamble of your life.
I think we live in a world full of "give me, give me" and so much stimuli that maybe none of us really have a chance (minus all of you that are making it - and are genuinely happy). I guess it's easy to blame the other person, but marriage is a 50/50 partnership.
We all change as we grow older, and thank goodness for that, or we'd be stuck in a non-growth mentality. A good question is how do we find a partner that is open to growth while the relationship continues? Honestly I don't think you can. You can guess and hope, but there are no guarantees. That's why I think marriage is the biggest gamble of your life.
I think we live in a world full of "give me, give me" and so much stimuli that maybe none of us really have a chance (minus all of you that are making it - and are genuinely happy). I guess it's easy to blame the other person, but marriage is a 50/50 partnership.
marriage is as only good as your partner. when the honeymoon is over you need to find another way to keep each other happy!
BSWALKS
Fugitive From Reality
You'll shoot your eye outThat's what batteries are for...
if thats all it took..I would buy her a 100 pack!..lmaoThat's what batteries are for...
jumpman23
Oh Yeah
Marriage is a big sacrifice. You had better be ready for it when you do it. A lot of people get married way too young. I told myself I would wait til I was 30 before I got married so I could get all my pimpin out of me lol. And it sure was fun before that lol. You definitely cant be a selfish person and expect marriage to work out. It seems a lot of times 1 person is more selfish than the other and that's why it doesn't work out. Its a team effort and you have to be somewhat on the same page about your expectations of the marriage. One thing ive learned as ive gotten older is you really have to pay super close attention to your surroundings because 1 bad move can screw your life up for good. I don't think people nowadays put the total effort into paying attention to everything that's going on in their life and surroundings. Is marriage easy, hell no but you have to work at it together. You have to be willing to endure the highs and lows of marriage. That's where patience and sacrifice come in. When your married you have to put your happiness to the side to make sure your wife and childrens happiness and well being always come first. Ask yourself that question and if your answer is no to that then you don't need to be married or have any children. Ive been married 10 years and its been cool. We were friends first which in my opinion sometimes really helps since you already know a lot about that person. Are there things you do that get on her nerves and vice versa, of course. That person isn't going to do everything you expect them to do or be that's a given. You have to be willing to take their good and bad. Alot of people shouldn't have kids but they do what societies norm tells them to do whether they want to or not, and from family pressure. Do what you want to do not what others expect and want you to do. We don't have any kids and that was by mutual agreement. Kids are cool but they are a lot of responsibility mentally and financially. Often times kids are what break up marriage from stress that 1 or the other cant handle. Me personally enjoy not having any kids, as we can pretty much do what we want whenever we want. If I wanna hang with the fellas I can and if she wants to hang with her gal pals she can. Freedom is highly under rated. Im lucky to have a cool 
wife who likes her time to herself and when we are together. That's where trust comes into play. Alot of couples have it all wrong as they think they have to be stuck up each others ass 24-7, im just like really dude you need to get a life lol. Any way sorry about the book I just wrote, just kickin some bulljive on here. Peace
wife who likes her time to herself and when we are together. That's where trust comes into play. Alot of couples have it all wrong as they think they have to be stuck up each others ass 24-7, im just like really dude you need to get a life lol. Any way sorry about the book I just wrote, just kickin some bulljive on here. Peace
Buck Fifty
Well-Known Member
Buck Fifty
Well-Known Member
cachsux
Wah
With the gas powered Fleshlight of course.
oldngray
nowhere special
S
serenity now
Guest
I think I saw that video.
uhh.......while I was surfing.....accidentally........I couldn't find the "stop" button.....
BSWALKS
Fugitive From Reality
That's what she said
gingerkat
Well-Known Member
I can't believe I opened that...well, at least it's "lightweight and easy to use" lol
Now I know my wife wants a jack hammer for xmas!
Notretiredyet
Well-Known Member
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