Divorce vs legal separation

[UpstateNYUPSer(Ret)]

When my ex and I divorced she agreed to take on a larger portion of the marital debt if I agreed to relinquish any claim to any equity that had been built on the house. I kept my vehicle, she kept hers. We split the credit card debt equally.

If you can try to use your attorney for most of the "grunt work" as it will save your ex money. I tried to get my ex to have my attorney draft most of the paperwork but she insisted that she have hers do the separation agreement. She spent $6K that she didn't have to spend.

 

[UpstateNYUPSer(Ret)]

If you two can work things out yourself you shouldn't need a attorney since there are not kids things shouldn't be that difficult. Again go to the probate website in your area and read how to file for a divorce. One person can file or you both can file together.

No kids involved? Go to arbitration.

 

[doodoobrwn]

If she could get a mortgage to buy the house and pay me the equity I had in it before we got married I wouldn't. I'd go buy another 3 bedroom house and move on. But she can't and I don't make enough to hold 2 mortgages and pay child support. The house is in my name only i brought it before we got married.

We have 2 kids 7 and 9 so that complicates things.

Kick her ass out if she can't afford some place to stay that's her problem fight for you children and keep your house regardless of the circumstances the kids love the parent who makes the most money so they'd probably be way better off with you and dude she's definitely screwing someone else if she can just get $3000 like that

 

[UpstateNYUPSer(Ret)]

Kick her ass out if she can't afford some place to stay that's her problem fight for you children and keep your house regardless of the circumstances the kids love the parent who makes the most money so they'd probably be way better off with you and dude she's definitely screwing someone else if she can just get $3000 like that

www.youareamoron.com/doodoobrown

 

[doodoobrwn]

www.youareamoron.com/doodoobrown

 

[doodoobrwn]

www.youareamoron.com/doodoobrown

Good try man....

 

[UPSGUY72]

When my ex and I divorced she agreed to take on a larger portion of the marital debt if I agreed to relinquish any claim to any equity that had been built on the house. I kept my vehicle, she kept hers. We split the credit card debt equally.

If you can try to use your attorney for most of the "grunt work" as it will save your ex money. I tried to get my ex to have my attorney draft most of the paperwork but she insisted that she have hers do the separation agreement. She spent $6K that she didn't have to spend.

I haven't seen my attorney yet I have the free consultation the 15th. She already been to her attorney 3 or 4 times and I'm sure she has talked to him by phone a number of times. I know she put a $3000 retainer down and could end up paying upwards of $6000. If I have to use my attorney that I had for years It will cost me about $1500.

I told her we could figure things out ourselves and just have the attorney write up the agreement but she isn't the brightest bulb on the street. Child is set by mass laws so the attorney can't change it. She has a pretty good paying job not as good as mine but pretty close so she be responsible for half the marital debt. are 401k or about the same and I was going to assume more of the credit card debit if she would give up rights to my 401K that seems to be a sticking point. She also can't qualify for a mortgage so that's another sticking point.

 

[UpstateNYUPSer(Ret)]

Good try man....

Why in the world would upsguy want to throw his kids out on the street? In the vast majority of cases, the kids are often better off with their mother and, from what I have learned about upsguy over the years, I see nothing that would change that.

When I got divorced I made sure that the kids had a nice place to live and that they were with their mother, which was a promise I had made to her in the event something happened during the marriage.

 

[UPSGUY72]

Kick her ass out if she can't afford some place to stay that's her problem fight for you children and keep your house regardless of the circumstances the kids love the parent who makes the most money so they'd probably be way better off with you and dude she's definitely screwing someone else if she can just get $3000 like that

She either got the money from her boss who is a millionaire or her father who retired. I can't kick her out there are laws. I know she isn't going to find anyone to co sign for her as her father is retired on SS and her mother doesn't make enough.

 

[UpstateNYUPSer(Ret)]

I haven't seen my attorney yet I have the free consultation the 15th. She already been to her attorney 3 or 4 times and I'm sure she has talked to him by phone a number of times. I know she put a $3000 retainer down and could end up paying upwards of $6000. If I have to use my attorney that I had for years It will cost me about $1500.

I told her we could figure things out ourselves and just have the attorney write up the agreement but she isn't the brightest bulb on the street. Child is set by mass laws so the attorney can't change it. She has a pretty good paying job not as good as mine but pretty close so she be responsible for half the marital debt. are 401k or about the same and I was going to assume more of the credit card debit if she would give up rights to my 401K that seems to be a sticking point. She also can't qualify for a mortgage so that's another sticking point.

First of all, the divorce should not cost you a penny in legal fees if you use a Teamster approved lawyer. If you do decide to use your own you should be entitled to a reimbursement of a portion of the fees paid. I think we get $400 but that may have gone up.

Second, if she wants the house, I would agree to continue paying the mortgage if she agreed to take on all of the marital debt and to leave the 401k's and your pension alone.

 

[doodoobrwn]

Why in the world would upsguy want to throw his kids out on the street? In the vast majority of cases, the kids are often better off with their mother and, from what I have learned about upsguy over the years, I see nothing that would change that.

When I got divorced I made sure that the kids had a nice place to live and that they were with their mother, which was a promise I had made to her in the event something happened during the marriage.

I telling you what I know he needs to keep his kids I went through a divorce with my parents and I wish I would've stayed with my mom due to her being the head of household I was very unhappy with the living conditions with my dad due to him being spoiled by my mom, you have spoiled her tough love works

 

[UpstateNYUPSer(Ret)]

"Tough love" is sending your kids to bed without dinner, not throwing their asses on to the street because you can't stand their mother.

 

[box_beeyotch]

Moral of this thread: don't get married and this will never be of concern.

 

[Package_Donkey14]

How do you find a teamsters approved lawyer?

 

[realbrown1]

My wife is trying to divorce me right now. Depending on you state probate rules she could stay on your health insurance if she wants until she gets remarried if thats the agreement you came up with on the separation agreement you signed.

And if you get re-married, UPS pays for your new wife and your former wife?

I don't think so.

 

[UPSGUY72]

And if you get re-married, UPS pays for your new wife and your former wife?

I don't think so.

No if either remarries the other would be off it.

 

[Brownslave688]

I know there is a difference between divorse and legal seperation. I've been told to anticipate being ordered to pay for 1 years of health insurance for her. Was just wondering if agreeing to a legal seperation instead of a divorse would save me from paying for that coverage.

I'd fill her out an application for a different ups hub and tell her there's your insurance.

 

[rod]

Never say never in a divorce----it will come back to haunt you every time. It sounds like she has a jump start on the lawyer thing so I would say "hang on for the ride because this ain't going to be pretty". What you think you are going to get and what the judge decides usually are 2 totally different things. I have never been divorced (married 44 years)------ I am just telling it like I have witnessed it going down for many of the divorces I have know over the years. One friend actually had his ex haul him back to court (lose a days pay) fighting over a rake a hoe and a shovel.

 

[UpstateNYUPSer(Ret)]

How do you find a teamsters approved lawyer?

Call your union local.

 

[clean hairy]

If a person signed up for the Hyatt Legal Plan, I believe their Attorneys handle Divorce.