Discussion in 'The Archives' started by browncow, Sep 17, 2002.

  1. browncow

    browncow Guest

    Exploring the Link between Gratitude and Attention
    by Gregg Krech

    It is rare to meet a person whose life is full of gratitude. Many people don't truly appreciate what they have until it is gone. And having lost the opportunity to be grateful, they simply find another reason to be disappointed.

    If you wish to cultivate gratitude you must develop a practice. Without practice, there is no development of skill - only an idea. You cannot become a grateful person just by thinking that you want to be grateful. Sometimes we are engaged in a practice, but we don't think of it as a practice. For example complaining. Complaining is a wonderful practice if you wish to cultivate disappointment, resentment and self-pity. Have you ever tried this practice? It is quite effective. Each time you complain you get better at complaining. It is like learning to play an instrument.
  2. browncow

    browncow Guest

    Coping with a chronic complainer

    There's no precise, clinical definition of a chronic complainer. But as anyone who's had the misfortune of spending even a few hours with one of these people can tell you, they're united by at least one common trait: the belief that they've been hard done by and a firm faith in their right to let everyone they come in contact with know just how poorly the world has treated them. While it's possible to tell complaining friends and relatives that you're not interested in hearing them drone on and on about how wretched their lives are, it can be a little harder to use this type of candor when dealing with a co-worker who keeps inviting you to join her in a private 'pity party.'

    Contrary to what is probably your most immediate inclination, it's best not to let the chronic complainer know exactly how much you dislike her incessant whining. While telling your best friend that you're tired of hearing her complain about her love life might seem like a good thing to do (it's certainly honest!), you have to be very careful not to offend her in the process. And considering the personality profile of the average complainer, this isn't quite as easy as it sounds.

    According to mental health and behavioural experts, the chronic complainer shouldn't be treated with malice (no matter how annoying she might become!). Above and beyond everything else, she wants to feel loved and to be accepted by those around her. In clinical terms, many chronic complainers can be described as 'socio-affective recognition addicts,' people who complain for the purpose drawing attention, feeling appreciated and being valued.
  3. browncow

    browncow Guest

    Quit complaining and reinvent yourself

    Nobody owes you a job. Face it. You will only stay employable if you have skills that are up to date and affordable. You can't hide behind a job description or a union contract. The reality is that, within 15 years, only half of you will be in full-time traditional jobs. Manpower Inc. is now the largest employer in the world. It's very likely in the future that you could be a contract employee, leased, freelancing, consulting or in any number of other arrangements.
  4. robonono

    robonono Guest

    Nice posts "browncow".

    These would appear to apply to the "Saint".