Non sequitur
Well-Known Member
I stole this from another forum but I thought the sh-thouse theologians would appreciate.
- I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
- Don’t wrestle with pigs. You both get dirty and the pig likes it.
- Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason
- I was educated once and it took me years to get over it
- Why waste your money looking up your family tree? Just go into politics an your opponent will do it for you.
- When I was 17, my father was so stupid, I didn’t want to be seen with him in public. When I was 24, I was amaze at how much the old man had learned in just 7 years.
- If you don’t read the newspaper, you’re uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you’re mis-informed.
- Do not complain about growing old. It is a privilege denied to many.
- Worrying is like paying a debt you don’t owe.
- The older I get the more clearly I remember things that never happened.
- Never miss an opportunity to shut up.
- It is better to be an optimist who is sometimes wrong than a pessimist who is always right.
- The trouble with the world is not that people know too little; but that they know so many things that just aren’t so.
- Never argue with a fool, onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.
- Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.
- There are laws that protect the freedom of the press’s speech but none that are worth anything to protect the people from the press.
- If you tell the truth you don’t have to remember anything.
- Temper is what gets us into most trouble. Pride is what keeps us there.
- Nothing spoils a good story like the arrival of an eye witness.
- A gentleman is someone who knows how to play the banjo and doesn’t.
- A lie can travel half way round the world while the Truth is still lacing up her boots.
