St. Patrick's Day

[floridays]

An Irish daughter had not been home for over three years.
Upon her return home, her father yelled at her, "Where have ye been all this time?
Why did ye not write to us? Not even a line! Why didn't ye call? Can ye not understand what ye put yer ol' mother thru?"
The girl, crying, replied, sniff....sniff.... "Dad, I was too embarrassed for I became a prostitute."
Ye what?!! Out of here, ye shameless hussy! Sinner! Ye're a disgrace to this Catholic family, so ye are."
"OK Daddy, as ye wish... I just came back to give Mommy this luxurious fur coat, a cheque for 2 million pounds and the title deed to an eight bedroom mansion.
For me little brother Shamus, this solid gold Rolex.
And for ye, Daddy, the sparkling new limited edition convertible Mercedes parked out front plus a life membership to the Limerick Country Club."
She takes a deep breath and continues, "And an invitation for ye all to spend New Year's Eve on board me new yacht in the Caribbean."
"Now what was it ye said ye had become?" her father asked.
The girl, crying again, said, sniff...sniff... "A prostitute Daddy." sniff...sniff.
"Oh! Me goodness! Ye scared me half to death girl! I thought ye said ye had become a PROTESTANT! Come here and give yer ol' Dad a big hug."

Can't beat that.

 

[moreluck]

The warden catches Seamus leaving the vicinity of the reservoir with a bucket of fish.

"Aha! I've caught you poachin' fish red-handed," says the warden.

"What do you mean, red-handed?" says Seamus.

"You've got a bucket full of 'em right there. You can't talk your way out of it this time."

"Oh, you don't understand," says Seamus, "I've not poached a thing. These are me pet fish.

I bring 'em to the reservoir once a week for exercise.

After they've had a good swim, they come back to the bucket and we go back home."

"Do ya expect me to believe such a tale?"

"I can prove it." say Seamus.

So they walk back to the reservoir and Seamus dips the bucket in and the fish swim away.

They stand in silence for 20, 30, 40 minutes...no sign of the fish coming back to the pail.

Ha, ya lying rogue! shouts the warden.

"Where are your fish?"

"What fish?"

 

[moreluck]

 

[moreluck]

Happy St. Patrick's Day !!

 

[oldngray]

 

[moreluck]

For a holiday, Mulvaney decided to go to Switzerland to fulfill a lifelong dream and climb the Matterhorn.

He hired a guide and just as they neared the top, the men were caught in a snow slide.

Three hours later, a Saint Bernard plowed through to them, a keg of brandy tied under his chin.

"Hooray!" shouted the guide. "Here comes man's best friend!

"Yeah," said Mulvaney. "An' look at the size of the dog that's bringin' it!"

 

[moreluck]

What have Irishmen and Jesus Christ got in common?

The both lived with their mother until they were 33 and neither had a job.

 

[moreluck]

"Well, Mike," said the doctor. "I can't quite diagnose your case. I think it must be the drink."

"Sure, that's all right, doctor," said Mike.

"I know how you feel. I'll come back when you're sober."

 

[moreluck]

 

[oldngray]

 

[moreluck]

 

[moreluck]

 

[Old Man Jingles]

Got my shirt ready for tomorrow and my order for 4 dinners of corned beef, onions, potatoes and carrots from my favorite local restaurant.

 

[oldngray]

 

[moreluck]

 

[moreluck]

Happy St. Patrick's Day !!!

 

[rod]

We will be doing a local St. Paddys Day parade at 1:00 then everyone comes to my house for a big bon-fire for an afternoon and evening of drinking and cornbeef and cabbage. Done that for years. Tomorrow is suppose to be 40-45 degrees. Perfect weather to keep the beer cold and the fire hot. There will be a lot of peeing in the woods tomorrow.

 

[moreluck]

Colcannon

Recipe By:Marc Boyer
"This is a recipe from County Mayo. It is traditional Halloween fare but good anytime! Kale can be substituted for cabbage."
Ingredients

• 1 pound cabbage
• 1 pound potatoes
• 2 leeks
• 1 cup milk

• salt and pepper to taste
• 1 pinch ground mace
• 1/2 cup butter

Directions

1. In a large saucepan, boil cabbage until tender; remove and chop or blend well. Set aside and keep warm. Boil potatoes until tender. Remove from heat and drain.
2. Chop leeks, green parts as well as white, and simmer them in just enough milk to cover, until they are soft.
3. Season and mash potatoes well. Stir in cooked leeks and milk. Blend in the kale or cabbage and heat until the whole is a pale green fluff. Make a well in the center and pour in the melted butter. Mix well.

 

[moreluck]

We will be doing a local St. Paddys Day parade at 1:00 then everyone comes to my house for a big bon-fire for an afternoon and evening of drinking and cornbeef and cabbage. Done that for years. Tomorrow is suppose to be 40-45 degrees. Perfect weather to keep the beer cold and the fire hot. There will be a lot of peeing in the woods tomorrow.

Rain predicted, but that doesn't affect the eating of corned beef and cabbage and all the fixins!

 

[Old Man Jingles]

We will be doing a local St. Paddys Day parade at 1:00 then everyone comes to my house for a big bon-fire for an afternoon and evening of drinking and cornbeef and cabbage. Done that for years. Tomorrow is suppose to be 40-45 degrees. Perfect weather to keep the beer cold and the fire hot. There will be a lot of peeing in the woods tomorrow.

Sounds like fun.
I hope you use good wood for the bon-fire.